tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-46580871743732048672024-03-04T21:21:00.987+01:00Valentin RozmanMy Desteni process support for self-realization: Writing myself to freedom by focusing on my breath, stopping the mind and inherited behaviour patterns, getting aware of my unconscious thoughts by bringing them here by writing, taking full responsibility for all of my emotional reactions by self-forgiveness of all accepted and allowed beliefs, ideals, and definitions and applying self-corrective application to direct myself as one and equal with all living beings and do what is best for all.Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.comBlogger285125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-48701039162913541722023-10-01T12:44:00.001+02:002023-10-01T12:44:15.682+02:00Day 212: Challanges of the arborist profession<p>It has been more than one year since I started developing myself as a climbing arborist. Tree care is mentally and physically one one of the most demanding rope access variants and my body had to go through a lot of adjustments. Muscle pains were a constant and the most persistant pain is in the small joints of my palms. Several months ago I experienced also a major back pain after s long period that took quite a while to diminish. And recently it came back aga recently due to additional stress factors. The first occurance was related to exhausting job of high cherry tree reduction and underestimating the charge for it. Also I was at that time not aware that the tree saddle can be adjusted much more ergonomically in order to eleviate the pressure at my lower back.</p><p>A week ago I got a new saddle that was suppose to be much better however it did not feel that way where wearing it. Sure it offered a lot of options for custimization in order to attach different tool holders however the texture of the inner padding was much more smoother and slippery. Thus there was less friction between the saddle and my back, causing the weight of the saddle to press on my hips instead of being distributer equally around my belt region. I did some additional adjustments recently that should correct the issue so I will see how it feels in the future climbings. That was the first contributory factor for reacurrance of the lowe back pain.</p><p>The second factor however was of a mental origin due to my decisions in terms of future development of my arborist career. One point is the cost of arborist equipment and my constant increasing investments. One can start climbing trees with basic tools that cost just several hundred euros. However considering the veriety of jobs that and arborist can face, it requires one to have larger arsenal of equipment that is aligned with professional standards that costs tens of thousands of euros. And most of it needs to be replaced every several years if not sooner due to war and tear, legislation of due to manufacturer instructions. It is equally with the knowledge and training. One can get some information from free or low-cost sources however the professional body of knowledge of arborists is vast and constantly expanding. Professional courses, trainings and certificates alse cost a lot of money.</p><p>Currently I am attending a 5-days aborist course at a middle school that is 2 hours of driving away. Since the classes start at 07:30 every monrning I decided to reserve a room at their hostel which was the cheapest way of lodging available. We are done with 2 days of lessons and there was a day off between the day 1 and 2. Instead of returning home I decided to stay for the intemediant day. Now I am back home since there was a 3 days of pause before we are to continue. So if I calculate the cost of the course alone and add the costs of lodging, food and travel it sums to a significant monetalty investment. Not only that but while I am attending the course I also am not able to work for profit and thus there is also the cost of loss of potential income. And the practical part of the course includes physically exhausting exercises of climbing and pruning trees that also take tall on my body, requiring me to rest for at least day or two after the course. Consequently my mind in producing a lot of thoughs of concers and worries that contributed to my current experience of the back pain. <br /><br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing for my mind to produce thought like: “The arborist course is a waste of time, energy and money since you already have all the knowledge thay you require to exectute jobs that the clients ordered.” instead of realising that I do not know what I do not know and I definitely already gaind very useful knowledge after attending just first 2 days of the course. I commit myself to when and as my mind is creating doubts about investments in professional training to constantly gradually invest in becoming a better professional considering the available savings.</p><p>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing for my mind to produce thought like: “You are already a middle-aged man and it does not make sense to star with arboriculture due to your body slowly becoming weaker and weaker.” insetad of realising that I am in relatively good shape and am getting old very slowly. I commit myself to take on loads aligned with the capacity of my physical body and to have enough rest while stopping and b reathing every time my mind starts worring due to loss of income in time of rest.</p>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-30975663721837323912023-07-11T05:23:00.000+02:002023-07-11T05:23:11.782+02:00Day 211: Finally got a laptop replacement<p>It has been one month since I visited the <a href="07.07.2023 Join Sunny and the Field Messengers for the REAL News! Paige shows us the impact of the Riots in France, Rick takes us to Anthem Cars and Coffee, a classic car show in Arizona, and then we enjoy a scenic Tour on the Duke in Alabama. It's Discoveration Friday, and we are learning about Convergent and Divergent Logical Thinking. In World News: Africa Malaria Vaccines; Japan Digital ID Issues; IRS Inheritance Tax Change; CDC Chestfeeding Infants; and more! https://www.unitednetwork.tv/videos/07-jul-23-news">Planet of Health</a> and got diagnosed with energy blockage in the bottom part of my human physical body. I was prescribed certain essential and cold pressed oils to take couple of times per day and a specific vegan diet. Two weeks later my back pain significantly diminished however it still did not go away completely. A day before yesterday while I went around the Maribor city suburbs on foot it looked liked the back pain was completely gone however the next day the pain was back in the morning while I was still in bed. Yesterday I decided to finally invest in a used laptop computer in order to have a comfortable enough tool to restart writing in this blog. Now I plan to write more regularly so that my unconscious mind patterns are processed effectively.</p><p>If I go back in time and look at the the events before my back pain occured I can see that it was related to several incidents. One was my general decision to start working as a climbing arborist that involved hard physical work in tall trees doing pruning or complete removal of a tree. In relation to that point I have been experiencing muscle pains due to new body movements however they were soon gone as the muscles adapted to such forces. More concerning thing was the chronic pain in my finger joints that started last year after doing very demanding hedge trimming for several weeks. At the end of November 2022 the joints on my fingers became so swollen and painful that I had to rest for the whole of December in order to regain normal movement. Thus in the beginning of 2023 I was very careful to slowly introduce strain to my fingers in order not to cause any permanent damage. However after doing heavy physical work with my hands the pain reoccurs and persists up to 2 weeks or more after I stop with such work.</p><p>The second incident was a specific job where I had to remove one cherry tree that was 10 meters tall, make another similar cherry tree half of its original size, and reduce several other beech trees. The weather in time of project execution was very unstable and it offered only small windows of time when the rain was not falling. So I did the removal of first cherry tree one afternoon and reduced the other cherry tree the following week. Just after I completed the reduction that was the time when I started to experience current lower back pain for the first time. I hoped that the pain will be gone after a night of rest and that next day I would be able to continue with finshing the project. However the next morning the back pain persisted so I decided to have a talk with the client. I wanted to renegotiate the fee since I realised that my quote was several times lower regarding the quantity of time or work needed to complete the project. The meetring resulted in client's decision to stop the project and I was payed for the so far completed part much less than I wished for. If I look at the thoughs that was going on in my mind during that time that eventually resulted in my back pain I can describe them like this:</p><p>1. I see that a climbing arborist work is very physically demanding. In recent years I have been working much less physically exhausting tasks since I mostly worked with computers. I will be 50 years old this year and I wonder if my body will be able in time to adapt to much more phsycally havy tasks.<br /></p><p>2. I see that my fingers get painful already after couple of days of hard work and they take weeks to heal. Will this situation in time improve and my fingers will get more resilient? Will change in my diet contribute to decrease or complete removal of pain in small joints?</p><p>3. I see that investment in arborist knowledge and equipement demands time and money. Will it be worth it, and is working with trees something that I am pasionate enough to do it for many years to come? Or will I loose the interest if some better opportunity comes along?</p><p>4. I see that quoting tree jobs is quite tricky since one similar tree can take several times more work to trim or remove that the other due to situation that can not be identified by just observing it from the ground. What to do when the actuall work necessary is far greated that originally predicted?</p><p>5. I see that in tree work weather is a significant factor that limits the time available to work on trees. Will I be able to earn enough in days of good weather? Will I get enough jobs in winter? Should I also work on trees while raining like they do in some other, especially northern countries?</p>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-63787541866360846452023-06-07T16:48:00.002+02:002023-06-07T16:48:31.223+02:00Day 210: Restarted writing<p style="background: transparent; color: #0e101a; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span data-preserver-spaces="true" style="background: transparent; color: #0e101a; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">It has been almost 2 years since I last supported myself with writing and I see that things accumulated to the point where I need to look at my situation and make some resolutions. I did start with a blog post last year during the plandemic, however, I did not have enough motivation to finish it. One of the contributing factors for not writing sooner is that several months ago my laptop computer got damaged beyond repair so only my desktop computer is available now. I tried to write on it however being in a sitting or standing position is so unpleasant for me that I can not do proper self-reflection. I also tried writing using pen and paper however I found it similarly odd and ineffective. I now finally created a solution where I am in a similar relaxed position as using a laptop computer while using a desktop computer. So the things that I need to address are related to a drastic change in my professional career where I switched from working behind computers to doing manual jobs in people's gardens. In the summer of 2022, I started trimming hedges and I slowly transitioned to bigger trees. The new type of job came with many uncertainties and concerns. One of them was observing the capacity of my physical body to do manual work. While I considered that I gave myself enough rest between jobs I started to experience massive pain in my palm joints on both hands at the end of November. <br /><br /></span></p><p style="background: transparent; color: #0e101a; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span data-preserver-spaces="true" style="background: transparent; color: #0e101a; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">Since besides the pain my joints also were not closing smoothly it was a very unpleasant feeling grabbing thing and I became worried that I permanently damage my fingers. Luckily after resting for the whole of December the pain slowly diminished and the functioning of the joints became normal again. Thus in January 2023 I slowly started to increase loads to my fingers and observed how they would respond. Sadly the pain came back after doing manual work only for a couple of days and persisted for up to two weeks. Such is the situation until now despite already making some dietary changes that should result in betterment. In February I did research about the causes of pain in small joints. What I found was the information explaining that humans after certain age produce 1% less collagen every year which is necessary for the regeneration of cartilage. So I started to take liquid collagen supplements in the form of ampoules every day that I purchased in a local cosmetics shop. Until now did not experience any noticeable improvement in my joints becoming more resilient so I searched for different options. A clerk at the city pharmacy recommended me some pills with glucosamine that should be more effective and I am looking forward to the effects.</span></p><p style="background: transparent; color: #0e101a; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br /></p><p style="background: transparent; color: #0e101a; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span data-preserver-spaces="true" style="background: transparent; color: #0e101a; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">Yesterday I also went to a holistic center called </span><a class="editor-rtfLink" href="https://www.blogger.com/#" style="background: transparent; color: #4a6ee0; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;" target="_blank"><span data-preserver-spaces="true" style="background: transparent; color: #4a6ee0; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">Planet of Health</span></a><span data-preserver-spaces="true" style="background: transparent; color: #0e101a; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"> for overall body situation analysis. They are using a special method where at the same time a temperature is measured on the left and right side of your neck, from the left and right armpit and the belly button. After 3 minutes of measurement computer prints 4 pages of data where around 150 parameters are being evaluated. If levels are normal they are colored green, if they are too low, they are blue, and if levels are too high, they are colored red. Then the therapist explains the results in simple terms and makes some questions. The results showed that my blood is pretty good, and that division of my cells is very fact however that I am not digesting and eliminating very well. Also that the temperature in the lower part of my body is too high which also explains the manifestation of lower back pain a couple of weeks ago which is also the reason why I came for a diagnosis. After receiving also some other helpful feedback the therapist recommended starting using some of their products which were cold-pressed oils and high-quality essential oils. I got detailed instructions on how to apply those oils whether by ingesting them pure or mixed with water or rubbing them onto my skin on certain areas. Besides that, I also got extensive nutritional instructions that included a specific vegan diet. Starting today, I am now changing my eating habits to even healthier with the expectation that it will result in me being able to handle physical body strains much better.</span></p><p style="background: transparent; color: #0e101a; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br /></p><p style="background: transparent; color: #0e101a; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span data-preserver-spaces="true" style="background: transparent; color: #0e101a; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">However since I realized how the biggest contributing factor to inner imbalance and consequent pain is mind patterns, I am now going to look also into this dimension of my existence. So the general result of the plandemic for me was losing trust in the government even more and thus my willingness to obey laws diminished even further. It is not that I am breaking laws that I see beneficial for public order and safety however I do not have the will to study every single new law and follow it since I even do not possess the capacity to remember them all. Thus I find myself in a position of constant danger that someone would at any time charge me with breaking some law and they would take my money or possessions or put me in jail. As a result, the only effective defense I see is to have as little in my bank account and own as few things as possible. Thus I am here also limiting myself in terms of being able to work commercially so I have to find other ways of covering my needs.</span></p>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-7915205904742855932021-10-02T10:50:00.009+02:002021-10-02T15:42:35.726+02:00Day 209: Too much on my shoulders<p>I have been making myself busy as far as I remember and I never get bored. In the initial years of my life, it was my parents who directed most of the things that I was doing, also because we had our own family business. Later I decided to break away and express myself as a professional creative in the field of visual communications. After relationship conflicts made me start reflecting on myself my priorities changed dramatically. In the last couple of decades, I have become more and more selective about what I do and what are the expected outflow consequences of my actions. I carefully decide how to spend every single moment of my life and do my best to contribute to changing this world into what is best for all life. However, a couple of weeks ago I started to feel pain in my shoulder area which is the indication that I fell out of my usual inner balance. So the purpose of this blog post is to gain awareness of what is going on inside of me and to make necessary corrections in order to regain inner harmony.<br /><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/biting-off-more-than-you-can-chew-life-review" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="560" data-original-width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5a41gwVJtpHkcmeoAxZLIshPCpfmU9b7OO3r2r3TLmE5P1CL0KrNadIPqrEHHmPT2q5XuE6uuoEs_nJt6jw_2Q7t7ZsM8IRM1rl3WZWoaKav1ql4ql93noDwrThok5cSH4Ps3zKIu9Q4/s16000/0209.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p>About a year ago I joined a global movement that resonated with me greatly. Amongst all of the organizations that discovered so far, I estimated that it has the potential to bring the biggest positive change to this world. So I decided to make myself useful in the best way I could considering my abilities. I started to develop a local chapter for that organization which involved the creation of a website and pages, channels, and groups on several social networks, developing a CRM system, and building a mailing list. A lot of work was also with translation from English to Slovenian language. That organization is producing daily news report videos in the length of around 15 minutes and to translate just one of them and to publish it on our website as an article and to then share it on the social networks, takes me around 6 hours. And there are also long Zoom videos that I translate and are from one to even two hours long which takes me a couple of days to translate.</p><p>Just in terms of translation, I wonder about the impact and the point of doing such work. It is hard for me to estimate how many Slovenians will benefit from my translations and how it would impact my nation in the long term. The population of our country is just around 2 million which is relatively small compared to some countries where our whole country would fit just in one district of one of their cities. This alone makes me wonder about the point of us having our own language and why do we not adopt English as our main language. In regards to this, some say that the Slovenian language is one of the oldest if not the oldest language on this planet, very similar to Sanskrit and that all the other continental languages developed from it. However, since we are all now communicating globally with increased speed, different languages have become points of separation. And those of us who are in non-English speaking countries have so much additional work to do and spend so much time just with translations that we have much less time to do other things. So just because some countries have implemented English as their main language, they can invest much more time in developing projects and can achieve more than others.</p><p>But there are also some benefits from doing translations. When reading, listening, or watching one integrates information just to a certain level. However if one is doing a translation of a body of information, they slow down, take information apart and assemble it again which results in the information being integrated and understood with much more detail and clarity. So while the translation is a time investment for me, I also personally benefit from that process and my awareness expands. Since there is so much information it is of course not possible for me to translate it all and I already experimented with creating a team of translators that would assist with that task. There were some members from or local chapter that volunteered to also do the translations however I took the responsibility of then checking the result of their work. However, the process of me reviewing the translations and performing the edits that I found necessary took me approximately the same amount of time like if I would do the translations myself.</p><p>The occurrence of pain in my shoulder area correlates with me being invited into a new translators group on Telegram where I would assist also with doing translation of the content on the new websites related to the global movement that I am now part of. So it looks like I have started to imagine how my workload would significantly increase and that it would definitely be over my capacity. And besides doing the translations, I am currently administrating our website, Facebook page, two Telegram groups, and a channel, writing new website content, doing the graphic design, programming of the online forms, maintaining the CRM system, managing email campaigns for hundreds of subscribers to our newsletters and translations, and many more. I am investing on average over 10 hours of productive work all 7 days of the week to move things forward and it looks like I am doing 95% of all the work in our local chapter group. I have invited others to assist and to take on any of the things that are required to be done but not many responded. Not only that but some even expressed their concern that I am trying to take over our local chapter and use it for my personal benefits which is definitely not true. </p><p>Other chapter members are holding onto many different excuses and justify why they do only as much or nothing as demonstrated so far. Some are busy with their regular jobs and family, some think that our mission is just to wait for the funding from the new global monetary system and then only engage in developing projects, some have concerns and doubts that the movement is legit and that what has been promised will actually be manifested. I cannot blame them since even I in the past joined many groups and movements that promised a lot and delivered a little. There are so many scams going on and we are in times where we are hearing almost nothing but lies on a daily basis from all the mainstream media. So I understand that many have trust issues and struggle with motivation to be part of some group and collaborate productively. Well from my perspective it is the responsibility of every individual to check all the available information, to make use of their intuition, and then decide whom to trust and whom not. I am ready for even the most trustworthy movement that I join to at some point fall apart and to eventually be exposed as deception. However, it makes more sense to me to at least contribute something to things that I currently see as most valid instead of wanting the proof and warranty that things are 100% reliable and that nothing can go wrong. They say a doubt can sink a ship so all the members need to maintain a high level of trust in order to be able to focus on what matters and move towards the goal.</p><p>Following the initial ranting and raving, I now progress towards the writing of the specific self-correction statements which I then speak out loud in order to shatter the crystallized mind patterns in my shoulder area that started to create friction and consequent pain in my human physical body tissue:<br /><br /></p><blockquote style="border: none; margin: 0px 0px 0px 40px; padding: 0px; text-align: left;"><p>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to focus on doing the translations by myself due to the belief that there is very little hope of finding high-quality translators to do the volunteer work instead of systematically working every day to find them. I realize that whatever my mind is creating as an excuse in order to keep me in the same pattern is pure self-deception. I commit myself to when and as I have a translation project to complete and my mind is producing thoughts like: “Better to do the translation by yourself since all the good translators are already very busy with translating other things and you will not succeed to get them on board as volunteers so best to wait until you will start becoming financed.” to stop and breathe. I then move myself every single day in order to send inquiries to translators and see how they will actually respond.</p></blockquote><blockquote style="border: none; margin: 0 0 0 40px; padding: 0px;"><p style="text-align: left;">I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to spend most of my time on the local chapter development projects tasks execution due to my enjoyment in combining my skill of graphic design, website development, and English language instead of developing skills of project management and delegating tasks to others. I realize that I am moving towards projects becoming larger and more complex so it is necessary to work on team building since it is not possible to do everything by myself. When and as my mind is producing thoughts like: “Just do as much as you can do by yourself and wait for others to find their own motivation to join the team and let them equally take initiative in researching what needs to be done and then work on tasks independently.” to stop and breathe. I then move out of my comfort zone of not wanting to communicate much with others, invest time in exciting others for the projects and direct them towards the practical development of the projects.</p></blockquote><blockquote style="border: none; margin: 0 0 0 40px; padding: 0px;"><p style="text-align: left;">I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define translations of uncensored news as a very important component for the organic growth of our mailing list and to mostly focus on sharing translation teasers on online social networks. I realize that there are more effective ways of expanding the email subscription base since a relatively small percentage of all the social network group members have subscribed so far. I commit myself to when and as my mind is producing thoughts like: “Just keep sharing the translation teasers on social networks and trust the fate that the right people will join.” to stop and breathe. I then slow down and take time to research best practices of how to create a big mailing list and measure the effects in order to find out what works best.</p></blockquote><blockquote style="border: none; margin: 0 0 0 40px; padding: 0px;"><p style="text-align: left;">I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use the technology as a buffer between myself and other people due to seeing others as not taking responsibility for their mental processes to the level of becoming able to communicate with me as one and equal. I realize that I am allowing my past traumatic experiences of being bullied and treated unfairly by others to hold me back from connecting with people on a more personal level. I commit myself to when and as I am considering working with others and my mind is producing thoughts like: “Rather communicate with the others via social networks and emails so that you can quickly block anyone that has become possessed by the polarised patterns of thinking.” to stop and breathe. I then decide to develop a more intimate relationship with people and maintain the high self-trust that I will be able to direct the communication by empowering others to align themselves with the principle of what is best for all.</p></blockquote><p style="text-align: left;"><br />For all who want to learn how to support themselves with writing, I suggest starting walking the<br /><br /><a href="https://lite.desteniiprocess.com/">DIP Lite free online course</a>.</p><p>And here are some links to supportive audios from Eqafe related to this blogs post that I also suggest you listen to:</p><p><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/biting-off-more-than-you-can-chew-life-review">Biting off More than You can Chew</a></p><p><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/under-pressure-life-review">Under pressure</a></p><p><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-my-life-as-a-bossy-perfectionistic-control-freak">My Life as a Bossy Perfectionistic Control-Freak</a></p><p><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/who-am-i-as-control-quantum-mind-self-awareness">Who am I as Control</a></p><p><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/developing-communication-and-expanding-relationships-life-review">Developing Communication and Expanding Relationships</a></p><p><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/everything-must-be-just-so-life-review">Everything Must Be Just So</a></p><p><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/avoiding-people-life-review">Avoiding People</a></p><p><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/lead-as-an-example-in-your-business-the-soul-of-money">Lead as an Example in Your Business</a></p><p><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/physical-communication">Physical Communication</a></p>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-17805688476412388302021-07-23T11:25:00.009+02:002021-07-23T11:57:32.583+02:00Day 208: Female attraction and me<p>I have already written a lot about my relationship with females. And the pain in my right testicle that reoccurred yesterday after a very long time is showing me that it is time to look deeply into this point again. I can already conclude that the reaction of the body is the result of my increased communication with three women in recent days. That triggered a lot of thinking about the possibilities of a relationship with any of them and how would it influence my life. In such relationships, I find things that attract me and things that I do not like. And it is also about the prediction of how my life would change according to my observation of other people that entered relationships and experiences in my past relationships with women. The major decision here is whether to have kids or not at my current age and the habit of living alone.<br /><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/relationship-success-support-with-agreements-facing-the-reality-of-self" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="381" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjw4JgBZjtqgYO6XLSXfxLEW7KQR67VQPuN3yL1H8raH_goo7JGTNix9mCovVx0BSOEBcvDmcLur2u3w2TxcVfJu8V26ioNW833nF980n5WllUSvRYUPOeG1go758If9HlnxCdBp1PTvwg/s16000/0209.jpg" /></a></div><br /><p><br /></p><p>The first thing is that I do not have a strong desire and mission to be a father in terms of having my own human offspring. I could say that the primary reason for that is that I do not identify myself very much with the physical body that I am incarnated in. While some consider their own children as part or extension of themselves, I see kids pretty much as separate beings. I see how kids in the first months and years after they are born need a lot of attention and would redirect the attention from what I am currently doing. And since I am making myself as useful as possible to make this world the best place for all I wonder if having children would significantly decrease my ability to function in such ways. So currently I am functioning more from a position of a holly father meaning that I treat every living being in existence as one and equal, as part of me or as my children. So from the position of awareness that all that can exists is me, I am primarily a father to my creation as one and equal. From that perspective, I have no desire or need to replicate myself even more or to create additional parts of myself in separation from myself. I enjoy solitude and simple life where I can rest and relax any time I desire. So I see any relationship with a woman as something that would create a disturbance of my peaceful life.</p><p>Some would argue that it is important for every real man to create a family. Some try to show how it is possible to be a father to human children and at the same time create a relationship with own children from the perspective of oneness and equality. Yet I see that this is only possible if there are certain preconditions existing, where one has a certain kind of mind, ability, and motivation to be a good provider. And also the environment with a lot of economic opportunities plays a role in that. So my current position and location, my past, my structural resonance, my physical environment, and also the current global pandemic are far from ideal parameters for me to engage in a role of a human father. I however am active at a project that is expected to manifest a system that will remove the lack of any basic necessities and then I would definitely reconsider experiencing myself in raising a human child.</p><p>There certainly are temptations in regards to women since I am experiencing myself in a male human body that has been programmed to respond to the opposite sex. Sensations such as the experience of orgasm and physical touch definitely create thoughts and imaginations of how it would be if I had sex with a woman again. However, I also see how any sexual act with a female would then create a bond that deepens with every additional sexual act. That can then trigger things as possessive relationship, jealousy and all kinds of drama that I definitely do not want. So I would certainly be up for a relationship with a woman that treats me as one an equal, that is emotionally stable, that possesses a high level of common sense, and that fully trusts me and never suspects me of anything that I actually have not done. Interestingly I have not met such a woman yet and all that cross my path are far from such ideal.</p><p>But then since all are part of me and if I see some woman in a struggle, I of course definitely want to assist her the best way I can. This especially goes for the females that live in my physical proximity and that are my good friends and colleagues. I understand their struggles and support them with listening, counseling, and coaching. With any of those females, I imagine how a relationship with them would be since some have engaged in a conscious relationship with men for the purpose of supporting each other to grow and expand. However after being in two relationships that later three years, I know how slowly people change, and if both are not fully committed to removing all points of separation, the conflicts occur on a regular basis. So I definitely do not want to compromise myself again by entering into a relationship with a woman that just wants to stay as she is, unless if she has already sufficiently become whole and gained high self-awareness.</p><p>From how I understand that women function they are much more emotional and internalize all experiences, especially sex. After all their bodies play the role of soil where new life grows. Men are much freer since they just eject seed and there is no much consequence of sex on their physical bodies. However, the woman can become pregnant which results in a massive bodily transformation that takes 9 months, and then they are also responsible to feed the baby with their milk for months and years. So it is logical that women treat sexual intercourse much differently than men. They also had to suffer monthly menstruation pain and bleeding and have constantly count the number of remaining eggs. And I see that women have also a stronger drive to experience themselves as birthing and raising babies.</p><p>In an ideal world, I would definitely like to see a system implemented that would secure the safety of survival and excellent health for women and men so that both parents could fully dedicate themselves to raise kids at least for the first key 7 years of their offspring childhood. It is definitely my vision and mission to create such a world and hopefully, it will happen sooner than later. Actually, my desire is for all living beings to co-exist in harmony and abundance. However, I am aware that I am just one of the billions of beings in existence and that I have a limited capacity of transforming this world into the best place for all. So in order to make the best use of my abilities and to leverage all my potentials with utmost effect, I must carefully select what to focus on.</p><p>I have assisted the women that I have been in an intimate relationship with, women that I became friends with, and women that live and have lived in my close proximity. I spent a lot of time talking with them on the phone and during long walks and all of them did make some progress. And I also gained new perspectives by listening to their struggles and attempts to break free from their addictions and obsessions. However, all had so strong and deep patterns that it was impossible for me to imagine being with them in a long-term relationship. I realized that I would compromise myself if I would persist in wanting to save them regardless of the costs. I discovered that also I have a lot of limiting points to transform within myself and that the most important thing is to take enough time in order to work on my own personal process of transformation.</p><p>Within this, the main challenge for me is defining my relationship to my male human physical body. Because I see how it wants to express itself sexually and produce offspring. The question is how to make a deal with it in order for it not to feel sexually suppressed and to make it consider all the perspectives that my decisions are based on. And I also need to question to what extent limiting my sexual intercourses with women is based on my suppression of myself as a being and to what level I am justifying my current limitations as an excuse for my decision to live a life of solitude and dedication to a higher purpose. It definitely is a challenge to actually make any decision about anything since once a decision is made, a new outflow of events for the whole existence is being set.</p><p>Thus it all boils down to a question of how much to care about anything in existence. One extreme is to care about everything and everyone and to be careful not to even kill the tiniest insect if possible. And the other extreme is to not give a fuck about anything considering that existence is a constant interchange of creation and destruction. So there would be no use to create an attachment to anything physical since it will eventually be destroyed. And since I somehow have entered this physical human body and I am not able to simply leave it and go somewhere else, I am faced with decisions on how to best endure until its expiry date. It is a strange game that I as the creator, creation and the created am playing with myself however it looks like that there is no way out but to take full self-responsibility for what is here.</p><p>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing me to ignore the sexual attraction of my human physical body towards the females and to not direct it towards setting a clear and exact relationship between my body and the bodies of the females. I realize that there is no such thing as a wrong or right decision and that there are only consequences and the turmoil of not being decisive instead of directing every single part of myself based on the principle of what is best for all life. I commit myself to when and as I am faced with many options to take enough time to compare what might the outflow of events be and then to make an informed decision without looking back ever again or worrying that I made a wrong turn.</p><p>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to when and as I see a female physical body to blame it as responsible for the creation of the attraction due to projection of my own sexual desires and addiction to the orgasmic sexual experience. I realize that women are equal beings that face their own challenges related to their own body and sexual system that can be equally triggered by me as a male and they could equally blame me for simply just existing as a male. I commit myself to when and as I meet any human regardless the sex and my mind would analyze them as potential sexual partners, to stop and breathe. I rather consider them as one and equal with all their conditions that are connected to their human and non-human experiences.</p><p>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to blame destiny for bringing a specific type of woman into my proximity and to see the woman mostly as a burden for men since men need to provide for them at least during the sensitive months of pregnancy and early childhood of the newborn kids. I realize that such a perspective is a projection of my own inability to better provide for myself and to generate more money. I commit myself to improve my self-care so that I would be able to comfortably potentially enter into a relationship with a woman without having to worry about money issues. <br /><br />Suggested related educational Eqafe audios:<br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/relationship-success-support-with-agreements-facing-the-reality-of-self">Relationship Success Support with Agreements</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-difference-between-male-and-female-emotions-life-review">The Difference Between Male and Female Emotions</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-manifested-dimensions-of-conflict">The Manifested Dimensions of Conflict</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/relationship-success-support-with-agreements-facing-the-reality-of-self">The Emotional and Feeling Body System</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/reptilians-sex-and-relationships-in-existence-part-5">Sex and Relationships in Existence</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/reptilians-the-relationship-between-sexuality-and-money-part-102">The Relationship between Sexuality and Money</a></p>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-23263789471892666612021-02-04T17:53:00.002+01:002021-02-04T17:59:28.221+01:00Day 207: The independent yet united<p>In the last two months, I have discovered two big international groups that I identified as well organized and with solutions prepared on the scale of the whole planet Earth. One is called the <a href="https://allatraunites.com/">AllatRa</a> with a vision to transform the current consumer society into a creative society via the voting platform for direct democracy. And the other group is called the <a href="https://www.lifeforce.cc/">Life Force</a> which has its own social network app, weekly Zoom reports, and international media network. They report about the most important events in regards to war against the Deep State and the woman who is ahead of the Ground Command is also in charge of the Global Trust that will finance the international Restoration Plan. They are also much more aligned with the <a href="https://desteni.org/">Desteni</a> group that I have been a part of for the last ten years and also talk about the ancient enslavement of the human race by the Annunaki with Anu, Enki, Enlil, and Marduk on the top of the pyramid. So I was facing a decision on how much of my time to dedicate to research and participation in each of those groups and their projects. And I also had to decide what information from each of these groups to share in other groups in order for the members of all these groups to benefit from all the available information and knowledge.<br /><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-dependence-of-independency-life-review" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="560" data-original-width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjF3JvZzFhGGiUkMlvZczVoseomR2wH4d3biSHjxiGjCLrViVt9cokC-I3Kcky9hyphenhyphenvdfHynYdOjItD6jbHQDCFaIeDggZu0NBfLHSgmp5FwswH5RRwXMrQlFRjfsvOlKhrXm0eOS8YUCXg/s16000/0207.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">What I would like to see is for the members of all the groups that really want to make this world the best for all to unite and work as one. Because we equally share the same reality, the same planet, and use the same global money system. Primarily what I see as the most important is to learn how the mind works and how to transcend it in order to become a responsible human being. Here the Desteni group is leading the way with the <a href="https://eqafe.com/">Eqafe</a> online educational library and the <a href="https://desteniiprocess.com/">Desteni I Process</a> online courses. Yet the Life Force group with <a href="https://projectspeak.net/kim-possible">Kim Ann Goguen</a> as the new comptroller of the global money system is the group that is providing the digital infrastructure for the international collaboration on the local restoration project and all the necessary funds to realize it. And there are many who do not care to be part of any of these groups and rely on building their own businesses and a financial support system within the current global monetary system. <br /><br />So there are two extremes when in the first case one is wonderfully obsessed with a single idea and is completely blind to anything else that exists out there. And the other extreme is spreading yourself thin by researching everything, jumping from one group to another, not really participating in any solution, and disempowering yourself by feeling small and lost. When I look at myself I consider being somewhere in the balanced middle of the two extremes. I had periods where I was very into first and periods where I was in the second extreme and that was not good for me. I was in several cases completely dedicated to a single project in order to produce large benefits and I did have high successes however it sooner or later ended due to influences that I was not able to control. I had to make peace with the fact that things in this reality are unpredictable and that it is best not to have a strong attachment to anything in this world. Thus I like to live a more independent life where I experience a high level of freedom and also be united by collaborating with others on the projects that are best for all life.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I see the potentials of how I can additionally change in order to remove my current weaknesses and build up the current strengths. When living and working alone at my apartment I enjoy the protection from the cold, from the noise, and from the nasty people. Yet I see that eventually, I need to interact with other humans, sometimes even face to face, and here I see how my vocal expression still result in undesired results and misunderstandings. Partially due to a relatively small vocabulary and this is why I am consistent with using a special vocabulary building tool on a daily basis and why I am also working as a professional distributor for that tool. And the other reason for the volition of my core being not being translated into appropriate words and sentences is due to persisting inherited mind patterns of separation. And this is why I am also constantly working on stopping, analyzing, and replacing the remaining tendencies that are connected to pure self-interest.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Suggested related Eqafe educational audios to listen:<br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-dependence-of-independency-life-review">The Dependence of Independency</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-my-life-of-co-dependency">My life of Co-Dependency</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/asking-for-accepting-help-quantum-systemization-part-112">Asking for & Accepting Help</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-balance-of-entertainment-and-self-learning-quantum-systemization-part-160">The Balance of Entertainment and Self-Learning</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/secret-information-life-review">Secret Information</a></div>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-78290918085180422032020-12-19T18:02:00.002+01:002020-12-20T17:59:27.655+01:00Day 206: Divide and conquer<p>In recent weeks I have lost my motivation to do my business activities where doing in-house presentations to families with kids is a part of the sales process. I succeeded with executing initial online promotions in order to generate new leads however scheduling presentations was more difficult. And actually closing sales proved to be even more challenging. Government restrictions, enforcement of wearing masks, social distancing, having to stay in own municipality and curfew definitely created a lot of obstacles also for my business. And when the kindergartens and schools closed and parents were faced with taking full responsibility to raise and educate their kids at their homes, that created immense stress to most of the families. Many parents lost their jobs, many had insufficient experience with using computers and there were also some who did not have a proper computer at all. So the general attitude of families about my offer to visit them and present a new learning technology to them was procrastination and postponement, Some seriously believed that me visiting them would present a real danger of spreading the virus. All this made me also to spend some time doing research about what is going on in the world and when to expect an improvement in the social and economic situation. <br /><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/atlanteans-the-decision-of-division-part-18" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="338" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfWxCpHPzrvLq1yUzs9cxa8ml03qg10ZiY2AuukcX8ZBn8CdDpKhRIp4yAwm9fFIM6D-08lVm9n-UtKVxTfyvgqqd6mDqyhruqsHb8mkshubGWnJJKlJvc-KPuT2pThBMQ20oqFZhMzA4/s16000/0206.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;">What I discovered are many perspectives on the agenda behind the government enforcement of restrictions and mass media reports about statistics that have been proven false. There is enough evidence for a conclusion that we are witnessing a massive power struggle on a global scale. Beings who previously controlled humanity are gone and the remaining pyramid of their collaborators is trying to maintain their previous position and influence. Some have a goal to execute as many people as possible and enslave the rest since they see humans as worthless eaters. And there is a plan of eugenics to selectively improve the human race using genetics or also creating synthetic bodies that will serve as an immortal vessel for the consciousness. Movies are presenting us with the wildest possible scenarios of events and the functioning of society on this planet and beyond. There are warning about artificial intelligence taking over and the possibility of erasing all humanity together. <br /><br />Learning about all various potentials of threats one is facing a decision on what to do in order to prevent the unwanted outflow of events and how to create a desired future. Many are in the position of very little global influence while some are in powerful positions and able to leverage their actions with immediate effect on billions of people. I am happy to discover that the global system, including banking, has been taken over by a very <a href="https://projectspeak.net/kim-possible">intelligent woman</a> who has the best interest in mind for humans and other living beings. And that she is now preventing the use of financial resources that the Deep State has used to bribe the world governments and individuals in manifesting international feardemic. It is predicted that soon funds will be available for the global Restoration Plan where this planet can be turned into the best place to live and thrive. Each individual can now decide what role to play in this period of transition from a linear economy of consumerism to the circular economy of creative expression.<br /><br />What we must do to create a better world is to stop everything that separates us. Starting with turning off the media channels that are dividing us with the claim of an invisible common enemy that is out there and that only by injecting some substance in our physical bodies it can be defeated. Yet the only true enemy that has ever existed is within us and has become us. It is manifested as our mind as the voice within that is turning us against each other. It is the thoughts that value some parts of this reality as something more or something less and thus create inequality. It is the emotional reactions that blind and possesses us until we become zombies that destruct everything within and around us. It is a desire to experience the energy that evolves into addictions, driving us into creating all sorts of friction in all possible ways. And thus while we are the one what is the problem, we are equally the solution.<br /><br />In this age of information overflow, one must decide how much time to spend doing research and expanding the frame of reference in order to gain the best situational awareness possible so that their actions will result in consequences that are best for all. And this is quite a tricky operation due to all the fake and opposing information that are hard or even impossible to cross-reference. Also just doing the research can be a distraction and addiction to itself that we can use as an excuse to neglect our own lives and personal process of change. Thus the safest way of investing own time is perfecting self by walking free online course like <a href="https://lite.desteniiprocess.com/">DIP Lite</a> for example. A balanced way of facing outer and inner challenges is the best way. The current world is a result of collective past decisions and if we want to manifest a better reality, each one of us must change our thinking and behavior patterns. The more individuals will work on self-transformation, the quicker will be the change in the physical living conditions of the global society.<br /><br />Related recommended educational audios at <a href="https://eqafe.com/">Eqafe</a> website:<br /><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/atlanteans-the-decision-of-division-part-18">The Decision of Division</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/distractions-life-review">Distractions</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/suppression-escaping-yourself-atlanteans-part-224">Escaping Yourself</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/it-is-time-to-change-reptilians-part-150">It is TIME to Change</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/filing-our-mind-finding-ourselves-reptilians-part-220">Filing our Minds, Finding Ourselves</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/media-hypnotism-quantum-systemization-part-54">Media Hypnotism</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/how-information-processing-disempowers-reptilians-part-221">How Information Processing Disempowers</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/secret-information-life-review">Secret Information</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/mental-hoarder-life-review">Mental Hoarder</a></div></div><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/information-transfer-reptilians-part-411">Information Transfer</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/wanting-to-know-before-you-start-journeys-into-the-afterlife-part-95">Wanting to KNOW Before You Start</a>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-64543824073107929392020-10-25T16:30:00.006+01:002020-10-25T16:31:36.099+01:00Day 205: Dangers of the Martyr Complex<p>The natural process in life is expanding, pushing the envelope, increasing our awareness, abilities, and capacities. Sometimes one can push themselves too much and from the starting point of the ego which then reflects in form of pain and whatnot. And this has also been my recent experience where I allowed myself to be enveloped by the Martyr Complex. Doing best for all is a trick mission that can quickly slip into a self-victimization character. When being in a group where the vision is to remove all points of separation from existence, the task can feel daunting, human life-span short and that then translates into great urgency and time pressure. Taking self-responsibility of all of the existence requires a decision about how to make the best use of available time to manifest the change out there while maintaining a balance in personal life so that personal power is not being compromised.<br /><br /></p><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/a-martyr-for-my-brother-life-review"><img border="0" data-original-height="560" data-original-width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9G_Vke9y4bzs6YN-h3Q0mVreEQy8bzBTDSP3oqqgAdon2nVZ_ZghnjUzAgYx6dvpqVNsBbPrNFv6-TkwjEPvFu4xn-urkjxchaj0qYvjODx9IRwhA1xVrWwzXbLTYVNeeMimc9VrBmlc/s16000/0205.jpg" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I am glad to be part of a group with the vision of improving the living situation on this planet for all living beings equally. And that I am a distributor of new educational technology that has the potential of empowering its users and making them more aware and capable of responsible living here in harmony and abundance. It is a great satisfaction to be part of individuals that impact society positively. At the weekly online meeting, our leaders motivate us with mission statements, visions, and executions plans. The objective is to create urgency and make us move towards at least reaching a minimum weekly goal. Some individuals are capable of moving themselves effectively since they have transcended the resistance to a sufficient level. However many are still in the beginning stage of the process and still influenced by emotions. So it is not easy to come with a universal approach that would be effective for all group members at their different location points.<br /><br />I have been conditioned in the past by living and working in the environment of my parents into being someone that requires to be moved by others using emotions. However, I have been walking not the path towards achieving self-movement for many years and made significant progress. Nevertheless, I have to be careful about the emotional pressures of others in order not to sacrifice myself too much and fall and consequently fall out of balance. I learned that one is able to help others effectively only if one has helped itself first and gained proper stability and capacity. A balance in personal life on all levels is suggested to be achieved and maintained at all times before one attempts to engage in the transformation of the global system. That includes establishing sufficient and regular money income, developing their own vocabulary, increasing processing speed, and gaining emotional stability. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">While working myself on these points I have noticed many resistances to change. In terms of sleeping duration, I learned that <a href="https://desteni.org/desteni-material/blog/questions-and-perspectives-sleeping-only-4-6-hours-required">humans require only 4-6 hours of sleep per night</a>. With that information, I have started to go to bed with a self-commitment to go out of bed immediately when I wake up naturally or after no more than 6 hours of sleep. I have experienced waking up after sleeping only 4 hours and recently I woke up after just one and a half hours. Yet whenever I would wake up and see how much time it only passed since I fell into sleep, my mind would immediately start creating doubt that I am rested enough. It created thought of fear that this can not be and that brain damage could develop if I allow myself to sleep so little. I do additional 15-minute naps during the day however my mind would calculate all the naps and add it to the total time of a daily sleep in order to reach the sum of 8-hour daily norm. During every nap, it created intense dreams that resulted in mental tiredness and decisions to continue with snoozing several times in a row. And I have become deeply disappointed about that.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Additionally, I also relapsed into watching short videos before I decided to take a nap. For example, after I would work with a computer for a couple of hours, I would go to my bed to take a rest. However, instead of just setting a timer on my smartphone for the alarm to wake me after 15 minutes, I got enticed with watching short movie clips. My mind has been justifying that I would relax even more if I watch some comedy gags or movie trailers that are no more than 3 minutes long. However, after I would watch the first one, I would not get enough kick out of it, and since YouTube is a master of offering clips that would interest you the most, I would continue with watching the second one, and then the third one and so one. So instead of only 15 minutes of planned rest, I would spend up to half an hour, sometimes even more, before the actual nap. And there would even be cases when I would watch some clips after the nap. It is like the mind would drive me into spending an equal amount of time that I saved by sleeping less with indulging in entertainment and thus showing me that sleeping less does not pay off. This is of course also something that I want to fix in order to decrease the wasting of time.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Now besides the pain in the neck and in the lower back, there is also a third pain that started to occur. It felt like it originated in the middle of the back and branched very narrowly across the left side of my back. It would shoot whenever I would work with the vocabulary building software that I am a distributor of in cases where I would make a mistake at typing the word from a default integrated word list wrongly. So it was a very specific pain connected to a very specific action which I found very interesting. I concluded that this was a consequence of self-judgment within anger, connected to the character of self-perfectionist. And shortly after I realized that and became aware of this point of limitations, the pain started to decrease and does not come up anymore.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I am now also in the process of listening to the supportive Eqafe audios that I listed at the end of my previous last two posts of this blog. I was able to relate to the explanation of a stiff neck to be a consequence of feeling trapped in a situation where I do not see any exit from and that I do not see any way back from where I currently am. From one perspective this actually is an existential fact since we all currently are experiencing a manifested consequence of our previous decisions and we can not go back into the past to manifest a different present reality. However, what we are able to start making better decisions at this moment that will manifest a better world in the future. And also after realizing that fact one can not go back to not realizing it. So from one point there actually is no way back and the only direction we are able to move is forward and in terms of awareness towards increasing its size.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I see the need to change how I handle mind resistances and the application of breaks. Napping seems to be the activity where I give power to the mind. So I am looking to reduce or replace them with some other activity. I learned that mental tiredness is best remediated by some kind of physical activity. So I will be experimenting with walking, running, exercising, and some other activities in order to make the most of each day.<br /><br />Related educational audios from Eqafe to listen to:<br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/stuck-the-soul-of-money">Stuck</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/unlocking-yourself-quantum-systemization-part-71">Unlocking Yourself</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/from-overwhelmed-to-breakthrough-the-future-of-consciousness-part-56">From Overwhelmed to Breakthrough</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/a-martyr-for-my-brother-life-review">A Martyr for my Brother</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/stuck-in-absolutes-the-metaphysical-secrets-of-imagination-part-56">Stuck in Absolutes</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/bringing-yourself-down-when-others-are-down-quantum-mind-self-awareness">Bringing Yourself Down when Others are Down</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/compromise-and-commitment-relationship-success-support">Compromise and Commitment</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/routine-sets-me-free-life-review">Routine Sets me Free</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/space-environment-routine-self-definition-part-1-life-review">Space, Environment, Routine, & Self Definition</a><br /></div>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-88780467580847841552020-10-20T10:38:00.001+02:002020-10-20T10:38:13.801+02:00Day 204: Directing myself to do what matters<p>There has been a major shift in my starting point, priorities, and focus. What I realized is that so far I have been doing activities where I would in the eyes of others look busy, diligent, and organized. That means that I have been doing a lot of documentary photos of all the events that I attended and other things that happened in my life. I would then spend a lot of time to download the photos from my phone, edit them in the most professional way, renamed and organized the files, and then upload them to my Facebook profile. I found great pleasure in taking pictures, making them perfect and sharing them with others so that they can also get some useful information and for them to have a reference for what I have been doing. Years ago when I worked as a professional photographer others paid me to do the shooting and editing, however in recent years I took pictures only for my personal interest. Eventually, I came to the conclusion that continuing the old habit like this is something that I am wasting my potentials by and that I am not adding much value to this world. It was mostly about presenting myself to others in order to play a certain character and to receive recognition from them. Now I have changed this point in terms of restraining myself from taking photos of every single thing that attracts my attention. And if I take some photos for the sake of documenting some event for the possibility of having to prove to others that it happened, I simply download the photos to my computer and keep them in a raw unedited form.<br /><br /><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/pain-and-process-part-1-what-matters-in-matter" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgabWFh8Tsp6CovuU-owE72cs0AO9ezQc-6q2h62GADKQOy5b_FBGQV07myQhwHJiYVJFCNAuhRZQ4vu9GgQ3PEQ2wVXRpZM3nN-Dm3nl8RTngzUNsGIOsMIn4ltoSiMoVSdBJPZO6Upww/s16000/0204.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />The next point that I looked at was the time I spend on social media, attending hangouts, participating in some groups, and watching movies. I noticed how quickly I get drawn to watching something, especially in form of moving pictures which creates a certain feeling of satisfaction by discovering something new. And how participation in social groups makes me feel noticed, accepted, valued, and part of something that will make a difference in this world. Yet the amount of digital content and online groups is increasing every second so I had to prioritize my involvement in order to make the best use of my limited time. I decided to increase the focus on my business of distributing new learning technology and using it also myself on a daily basis to increase my capacity for processing information and increasing the quality and quantity of my vocabulary. So I defined my mission to perfect myself by developing the skills of communication and influencing others and also showing others how they can do the same in order for as many people in this word to become highly capable and responsible in order to bring forth a world that is best for all life.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">In recent weeks after using the said learning technology regularly for at least 2 hours per day, I noticed a substantial increase in my focus, clarity, determination, will, and bravery. What also started to happen is that I would wake up naturally after sleeping only around 4 hours. Initially, my mind would immediately produce a thought convincing me that humans need around 8 hours of sleep so I made myself continue sleeping for the additional 4 hours. However, I learned before that the human physical body requires only around 4 hours to rest, and the additional time of sleeping only results in the mind regenerating itself and thus gaining more power to distract and suppress us. And I also learned how the words leaders and the most successful people sleep very little, some even just 2 hours and then doing short naps during the day. So I decided also to get out of the bed immediately after I would wake up naturally, no matter what duration of my sleep has been. I have been experimenting with different ways of taking charge of my physical body and to actually get out of bed and fully wake up. It has been challenging to get out of such an appealing comfort zone like a warm cozy bed and I was not always fully successful. However, I am pushing myself to cut down the time of my sleep to as little as possible in order to have more time in a day to be productive.<br /><br />What I also noticed is how often I check the time and to what extent I allow it to influence me. When doing business and collaborating with others time certainly is a factor that needs to be considered. We do measure time in days which are then sliced into hours and minutes. Thus some consider time as their most valuable asset since each of our lives only so many years and we can achieve in one lifetime only so much. Many successful people use the <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Time_management" target="_blank">time management system</a> where every single activity is being scheduled in slots as small as a couple of minutes. While I was doing creative work time was not so much of an issue since the deadlines were quite long and the main objective was to come with a unique creative solution that was not so much valued in the time spend to produce it but in effect that it produced. And this is why I had resistance to organize my life based on time. Even with sleeping, I noticed how by just looking at a clock I am already giving my mind the information in order to calculate the duration of my sleep and based on then create a feeling of being rested enough or needing some more sleep instead of me communicating with my physical body and directly seeing it had rested sufficiently. So in the morning I now refrain from checking the time immediately. And when I create my first daily log entry I am careful about my mind not to create any comparison and estimation if I have slept enough or not.<br /><br />An additional point was developing a habit and support system of following up with people and directing them in the long-term in order to achieve a specific objective. Previously I defined myself as an introvert, I did creative jobs where I needed a quiet and peaceful environment in order to concentrate on designing and programming with computers uninterrupted for hours. And now my mission is to influence and change others which means frequent and persistent communication with many individuals which is the exact opposite of what I have been used to do. This again pushes me intensely out of my comfort zone and creates a lot of resistance. It makes me have to decide about many more things that are far less predictable since every mind of other humans is a world of its own. I have to evaluate every individual on many levels and then decide when in by which means, using what word and exposing them to which information would result in directing them towards increasing their awareness, self-responsibility, and capacity. Each person is with a unique history of experience that shapes them and on at different location points. And it takes many years for everyone to grow and expand into an exemplary human being. So I am developing and applying a system of making a lot of notes in regards to every individual that I communicate with and then to follow-up with them on a regular basis.<br /><br />Now what I have to be careful about all of this is to maintain a balance of self-care and care for others in order not to lose my personal power. The manifestation of pain at points in my spine is a reminder that I have gone too far from the track. Recently some pain has manifested in my lower back. And even a more prominent pain manifested in my neck. The contributing factors for this can be the increased time spent calling people on the phone in a standing position where the weight of my hands creates much more pull comparing to my usual way of working in a sitting or partially lying position. However, I am familiar also with the <a href="https://desteni.org/desteni-material/blog/veno-structural-resonance-part-2-phase-12" target="_blank">back neck point structural resonance</a>. It explains how the pain in that area is connected to the ability to change things and stand up for yourself. And I am able to track back the start of pain developing in that area especially when some older lady that just became my Facebook friend called me via Messenger video and started to engage in an extensive and long conversation without consideration of my time and what I was doing. I find a direct unannounced video call not very considerate and intrusive and it was a new experience that I had to respond to.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">While my objective is to increase communication with other people I am making sure to be as considerate as possible. So when I call somebody on the phone, I immediately ask them how they are, where they are, and what they are doing. This gives them the opportunity to explain if it is a good time to speak and enables me to decide if I should continue the conversation and for how long. Other people usually do not call me with exception of my father who calls me on the phone a few times per month. And usually, he wants me to immediately or very soon to do some design work for him end eventually pays me for that. However, when others call me I can not tell so sure what they want from me, for how long they want to speak to me, and what would be the result of communication. I see how I prefer for any call to be scheduled with me in advance by firstly contacting me via social media or text messaging which is less intrusive and does not disturb my own schedule. While previously I had my phone turned on all the time, I am now also turning it off completely when I need to focus on something like writing this blog post.<br /><br />Here are some related suggested educational Eqafe audios for listening:<br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/stiff-neck-what-matters-in-matter">Stiff Neck</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/stiff-neck-practical-support-what-matters-in-matter">Stiff Neck Practical Support</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/pain-and-process-part-1-what-matters-in-matter">Pain and Process</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-history-and-purpose-of-sleep-reptilians-part-599">The History and Purpose of Sleep</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/do-beings-on-the-other-side-sleep-reptilians-part-600">Do Beings on the Other Side Sleep</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/mental-tiredness-vs-physical-tiredness-atlanteans-part-61">Mental Tiredness vs. Physical Tiredness</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/mind-asleep-mind-awake-kryon-my-existential-history">Mind Asleep, Mind Awake</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/why-do-i-wake-up-in-a-mood">Why do I Wake Up in a Mood?</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/do-you-only-rest-when-you-sleep-quantum-systemization-part-134">Do You Only Rest When You Sleep?</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/mind-feeding-routines-feeding-mind-quantum-physical">Mind Feeding Routines Feeding Mind</a><br /></div>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-64225167177523838442020-10-04T13:47:00.003+02:002020-10-04T13:47:41.746+02:00Day 203: When nobody is looking<p>Currently, I struggle with motivating myself to do some tasks that I determined would be the best use of my current position and potentials and would contribute greatly to creating a world that is best for all. The tasks where I do not experience much of resistance is investing up to two hours of my time each day in the morning to work on perfecting my vocabulary. And 6 days ago I also added the task of reading aloud one post from the blog of <a href="http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com/">Bernard Poolman</a> from the oldest post onward. That is of course additionally to my other tasks of morning routine like drinking herbal tea with zeolite, speaking gratitude statements, and doing the <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8RMuXIZAtA">Five Tibetan Rites</a> before I have my fruit salat for the breakfast. However, when I proceed to do my business-related tasks I find myself in the difficulty of focused and consistent movements.</p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/lethargy-looking-ahead-atlanteans-part-216" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="591" data-original-width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTgoAKQ9e4kHFg9WFC1nejFXMzijYvQMSkY9TBgEZ-KlYPP-IQgLeqLDiesqOyF295tuEvhSj5jPOJDIv313d1cRcApR3HHPxPVW2355PJPSYd8kJdAdLnnwCeBOgqEHrLT8nfb8_XgbE/s16000/0203.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />I have a long list of things that I plan to do business-wise in my <a href="https://nirvanahq.com/">Nirvana</a> productivity app. But when I look at the list, I already face the challenge of deciding what to do next. I noticed that the sole fact that I manage my task on the computer is already something that creates a specific feeling of intangibility and indefiniteness. I have been using computers as my main tool for decades. And I like it from the perspective that I can store and retrieve extremely vast quantity of information and share it with others all over the globe. However, it also makes me less grounded and is attracting my curiosity to research all the available information that I have access to by using it. I am currently observing my level of addiction to using social media and watching videos and I am not happy about my current state in regards to that. I am looking into how to ground myself more and one way is to work using analog tools. I have purchased a set of new notebooks that I am using now to place my thoughts onto paper with a pen. So far I have been writing my process blog post exclusively in a digital format to an online blog like this one. And now I plan to do additional and preliminary writings also to my paper notebook.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I learned that there is a big difference between writing by hand and typing words using a keyboard. Specific neural pathways are supposed to be formed and information imprinted strongly into the brain when writing with a pen to paper. This is because a more complex and natural movement of hand and fingers is being used where the hand is pulling a pen in all sorts of directions with different speed and pressure. Typing words on a computer is far less expressive since one has to target and hit a specific key with a specific finger with the same force in order to type the words. The keyboard is a superior writing interface to a pen and creates more discomfort and anxiety. Yet the downside of writing by hand is that information can not be copied, backed up, stored, retrieved, and shared so quickly and easily and it consumes physical space. Nowadays hybrid options are available like touch screens that enable handwriting with a stylus, digital paper pads, and electronic pens that record handwriting on paper and convert it into a digital form for conversion into typed text. I will be experimenting with these options in order to see what works best for me.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Besides the challenges of using specific tools for my work, there is an even deeper layer of contributing factors that slows down my movement. It is about my primary self-definition, my life purpose, and the personality character that I have developed into. I feel deep shame for functioning as someone who is addicted to impressing and shocking others by sharing secret and advanced information while not actually integrating it to the level of full comprehension. I feel so stupid because I am listening, watching, and reading so much of different information yet I am incapable of uttering it to others in a way for them to comprehend me. And I find my reactions of envy and spite towards others evil to the point of not deserving to live. I have been so defined by relationships to others in a negative way that I am finding it hard to function on my own, motivate myself, and be sincerely driven by the principle of what is best for all life. What also needs to change is my relationship to the money and to create stability in using all possible means of exchange.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">In general, I see that the development of digital technologies has contributed to me becoming more restless and my mind stimulated since it is basically its external manifestation. Being used to others telling me what to do or not do, I lost my will and courage to express myself creatively. While currently reading a book by a Slovenian author with the criticism of the public educational system, I have realized that I have not been suppressed only by my family environment but also by having to endure the torture of forced schooling. And now with global <a href="https://plandemicseries.com/">plandemic</a> terrorism, the challenges that we face have become even greater. After watching some documentaries recently about the development of robots, artificial intelligence, and <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deepfake">deep fake</a> technologies, I am a bit concerned about what the future will bring. There are new threats emerging along with the progress of technology and it is becoming increasingly difficult to recognize and neutralize them. So it also I question how much time per day to spend with learning about the increasingly complex and fast-moving global society and how to successfully and in time adapt to it in order to survive.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Since I live and work alone in my apartment I am from time to time wondering what to do in order to be more motivated to do things that I find tiresome. But when considering the options of getting a cat, a girlfriend, or a co-worker, I also see the downsides of someone being with me in my apartment. While someone else would add to the dynamic of my relationships, they would also make it more complex and disturbing. Recently I have been experimenting with accountability partners where I asked some of my peers to meet me online in order to support each other with doing what each of us wants to do. That did give me more confidence however it also added to the complexity of my work environment. I started to ask myself how much if at all I require some outside stimulation to move me into executing what my business goals are. The conclusion has been that ultimately it would be best for myself to develop the ability of consistent self-movement and to use the tools of writing to remove all the limitations that prevent me from becoming someone like that.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">All that I need to do is to continue releasing myself from the attachment to positive and negative energies of the mind. That translates to end seeking any kind of outside validation of what I am and doing and to genuinely do what is best for all life, even when nobody is looking. I need to develop pristine self-expression and take proper care of all aspects of my private and business life. I have to increase my focus, ground myself more, and restrain myself from all kinds of selfish temptations inwards and outwards that consume my precious life potential.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Suggested related Eqafe audios to listen:<br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/lethargy-introduction-atlanteans-part-212">Lethargy: Introduction</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/lethargy-domino-effect-atlanteans-part-213">Lethargy: Domino Effect</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/lethargy-a-physical-experience-atlanteans-part-214">Lethargy: A Physical Experience</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/lethargy-the-gifts-within-atlanteans-part-217">Lethargy: The Gifts Within</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/lethargy-looking-ahead-atlanteans-part-216">Lethargy: Looking Ahead</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/lethargy-self-forgiveness-atlanteans-part-215">Lethargy: Self Forgiveness</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/self-forgiveness-on-the-experience-of-lethargy">Self Forgiveness on the Experience of Lethargy</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/why-we-create-fear-instead-of-solutions-life-review">Why we create Fear instead of Solutions</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/self-judgment-and-sudden-tiredness-quantum-mind-self-awareness">Self-Judgment and Sudden Tiredness</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/empowering-yourself-instead-of-depending-on-others-quantum-systemization-part-168">Empowering Yourself Instead of Depending on Others</a></div>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-26561491531769184012020-09-24T09:51:00.010+02:002020-09-24T09:53:22.042+02:00Day 202: The point that I am walking<p>This post is in regards to feedback of my peers in one of the chat groups that I am part of. They have shared their perspectives about my sharing of my findings and found them as imposing and not aligned with the purpose of the group. I noted an explanation of how the context, position, and location of walking and sharing a point is a very tricky part. And how it is best to share a point only after one has walked it completely and has manifested results as the proof of the validity of the point is a solution that is best for all. I learned what points some are walking and that it takes many years, up to 14 or even more, to complete with a point. So it is best to walk a point privately and refrain from constant sharing of our discoveries and realizations in regards to that personal point to others until it becomes mature enough. That begs the question of what the point that I am actually walking in this life is?<br /><br /><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/why-your-weakest-points-are-your-greatest-strength-life-review" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank"><img alt="Why your Weakest Points are your Greatest strength" border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="357" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfXF8rPLY3lzsppMGQ7A5uRT9gkLD_-tUb4LDNhux1z7GpMJS9nrxHNx7HavCGG3c7moHqDvdctwiRydbcGNeOEFJjGaWwTp3r8oxZe6jEwqwFAOj4ajBVmG_bJ5PEfVOSmxo4D1z9zi4/s16000/0202.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /><br />The core experience in my current life can be explained with the events that happened as observed during a guided therapeutic regression into my previous life. I found myself in a female body that has been publicly executed by hanging in front of a mind-obsessed crowd. The reason why they found me as not worth living was their belief that I have become impure after one of the invading Viking has raped me. At that time I had a boyfriend who resented me for letting myself hanged while remaining silent. And the reason why I did not defend myself by speaking out was that I did not see any point in it. At the end of the regression session, I connected that the violent Viking that raped med has in my current life incarnated as my father and my formal boyfriend incarnated as my younger brother.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Using the vision of my previous life I was able to realize the relationships in my current life where I have actually been suppressed by my father in terms of having to do exactly what he demanded from me and not being allowed to speak back or I would experience the wrath of his anger. And I moved about of the house of my parents and left my younger brother behind without any previous notice to him while until then we had a pretty close relationship. I was basically unable to solve my situation by using words since I had a poor vocabulary and an extensive amount of accumulated fear. And at the same time, I perceived myself as someone with high intelligence and very advanced in terms of intellectual capabilities. So I concluded that if there is nothing wrong with me, there must be something wrong with all other humans in general.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Now I am realizing that while I was able to excel it was only in an environment where I used my mind and thinking process and computers or related digital technology. And whenever I was in an environment demanding to use the voice mechanism of my human physical body to communicate with other people I failed miserably. And since my father has been constantly pushing me to excel in things in order for him to be proud of me, I lacked to recognize that such an attitude is only effective in relation to him personally. So whenever I would apply the personality of excellence within relationships to others it would be perceived as superiority and met with envy or disimprovement. Thus I am slowly but surely discovering the actual points of limitation and separation and transforming them into what is best for me and others.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Another perspective on my relationship with my father is in terms of money. Even when I finished secondary school and got employed by my father I did not actually receive a salary and I was not taught anything about how money works. It was my father who went out and bought all the production equipment and material, he was the one who delivered the products to our clients, my mother would be the one who issued the invoices and my father would then manage all the money. If I wanted something for me personally or for our business I would have to go to my father and ask him to do the purchase. And he would then deliver the purchased items with great pride and good feels like it was his personal donation to me or to our company.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">So the point that I am walking is foremost becoming vocal and speaking out without any fear of what others might think or say. Then it is speaking in a way where I do not perceive me as superior and thus try to diminish others but to speak to others as equal which means the development of compassion, empathy, active listening, asking questions, and telling stories. In that regard, I am also realizing how ineffective my vocabulary is so I am investing at least one hour per day to rebuild and expand my vocabulary, especially in the English language. Since I am living and working alone there is no much opportunity during a day to actually speak to anyone so I see the need to practice speaking more and I am looking for a way of developing this skill to a sufficient level.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">In terms of money defined as the measure and store of intrinsic value, I am actually working on comprehending what I value of something is and how to measure it. And in terms of currency defined as a volatile circulated medium of exchange, I am actually surprised why humans would even use a form of money that is volatile instead of using a medium of exchange that has a stable value. So when combining values and words we come to agreements and legislations where I again wonder about the existence of the mechanisms that enable to enforce a unilateral (un)agreements while the legislation is at the same time defining such act as a punishable crime. So I am discovering tricks and traps of the court and comprehending their game in order be able to use the words to protect myself effectively against anyone that wants something from me against my will.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">While I am also to a minor extent following the development of <a href="https://keshe.foundation/">the new plasma technology</a> and what is happening behind the scenes of the global politics, including the economic shutdown, I am according to my personal point focusing mostly on the core reason for humans to think, communicate and behave the way they do. Which boils done to words, their definitions, and energetic attachments. Because we can express ourselves with speaking and writing and comprehend reality only according to how large our vocabulary is, how good we know all the definitions of the words, and to what extent we have removed any positive or negative polarity from the word we know. When those foundations are perfected, one is able to defend itself against any written and spoken word and also defend the one that is not able to defend themselves. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Some think that laws must be obeyed, regardless of what they say, yet there are effective ways of refusing to accept any law by using the same argumentations that laws argue their own existence and validity. Each of us is an equal creator and a word of someone cannot be more powerful than the word of anyone else. So each is responsible for what they accept within themselves and allow them to continue to exist and the only reason why someone would not do that is self-dishonesty and self-disempowerment. I learned that any fear is just an illusion and each time one is giving in to any kind of fear, they give their personal power to the illusion and thus make it stronger. This is also why I have decided to not wear the mask because I have done my research and realized that it does not protect me or others from viruses and diseases. Demands to wear masks are based on invalid fear and thus my point is also to walk without the mask at any time and bravely face all the fears that challenge me.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">The advanced level of the language that I am studying for the same reasons is the <a href="http://dwmlc.com/">Correct Quantum</a> language that is currently being used with great effect by: <a href="https://lastflagstanding.com/">Russel-Jay: Gould</a> for the liberation of this world. Many things are happening behind the scenes where others are walking their points towards completeness and are are just now coming out to the public. Some think that what they do is ineffective because they do not show any proof for it, yet the reality is that many have abused what they showed so far and thus they have became more careful about what they show and what not. They are perfecting their point and placing protection mechanisms in order to prevent others to use it in a harmful ways. Many of them have also been under heavy attack, mockery and even assassination attempt. A lot of them died because they were not able to protect themselves successfully. So it takes a lot of courage, dedication, time, persistence and alertness in order for a powerful point to be fully developed and eventually delivered for the benefit for all.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">When all these points will be fully developed and deployed, I see the world were written and spoken words will be allowed to used only to establish equal agreements based on what is best for all life, I see the abundance of any chemical elements and all kinds of energy, I see vast improvement of mental and physical human health with increased longevity, I see mutual collaboration to clean this planet from all pollutions, I see new ways of space travel and nourishment of the human body where transcend limitations of times, space and matter. I see expansion beyond most of people are currently able to imagine. And I plan to play a significant part in that process by expanding my inner world which will then result also in expansion of the outer world. I am expecting to face a lot of inner and outer resistances on many levels however these are challenges that I am looking forward to since overcoming them will fill me with deep satisfaction.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Suggested related Eqafe audios to listen:<br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/why-your-weakest-points-are-your-greatest-strength-life-review">Why your Weakest Points are your Greatest strength</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/creating-purpose-reptilians-part-371">Creating Purpose</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/your-purpose-in-process-reptilians-part-372">Your Purpose in Process</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/atlanteans-missing-the-point-of-ourselves-part-41">Missing The Point of Ourselves</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/why-is-the-mind-so-seductive-reptilians-part-216">Why is the Mind so Seductive</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-nature-of-process-demons-in-the-afterlife-part-53">The Nature of Process</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/stand-your-ground-life-review">Stand Your Ground</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/when-your-process-gets-trolled-reptilians-part-505">When Your Process gets Trolled</a></div>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-62667389410514402582020-09-13T17:12:00.003+02:002020-09-13T17:12:39.242+02:00Day 201: Lack of motivation to live my life fullyI have been reading, hearing, and watching stories of great success in the lives of others for many years. Stories about the people who were born as poor, who struggled with their low self-esteem, yet they then transformed their lives and become very successful and rich. I have been part of groups where they are teaching principles of success yet I wondered why somehow all that knowledge does not stick with me. Why does it simply not rub off and influence me into also becoming someone who develops my own business projects that generate a lot of money and why I have not created my own family?<div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/motivation-life-review" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Motivaton" border="0" data-original-height="560" data-original-width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGl8A-fwbFz1iGACZIV0W76lVMc_sQVGkAnewjMQfC1_KSbNbQK6-a7ewZljIXWqNtqMuAb0EKuJDDahK8zhuSei7THVT0-OjVF6YhU3CipJ9rQZeCM7Wjtcqk1PaY6LQb_Mbps11tZ6A/s16000/0201.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">In current times of the coronavirus feardemic, I am observing how confusion about what is actually going on is increasing. There are pressures to war mask and some are predicting forced vaccination, transition to use of only digital currencies, and implementation of a totalitarian state where everyone will constantly be tracked and monitored, like in China. And some fear that the 5G technology will be used to significantly depopulate the human race. These certainly are dangers that make living not very pleasant and many are becoming more and more depressed. Also, I am wondering what to do since the world is changing drastically and I have to make decisions about what to do in order to face all the challenges.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">A few months ago I have started to work as a distributor of new learning technology. It is a high-ticket product and I have been wondering how successful I can be with selling it considering the current global economic situation. Distributors have been handed a presentation book that we use to explain to prospective clients the relationship between vocabulary and success in life. And I have also been using the tool for myself in order to rebuild and expand my own word treasure. I am each day spending at least one hour to progress with the integration of the word lists that are arranged by levels and correspond to the grades of the public education system.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Integrated word lists include many words that are familiar to me and also words that I have absolutely no clue what they mean. For each word, I check the definition in several dictionaries in order to learn every context of its use. This activity made me realize that some words have very little or just one definition and some have over 50 possible meanings in indifferent situations. It takes quite some time to progress with the integration of words and I wonder if it is worth investing so much time in learning words with such perfection. Because who knows how ofter if ever there will be an actual opportunity to read texts or to communicate all the words that am integrating by expressing all of their possible definitions.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Words are being used more frequently with some meanings and less frequent with other meanings. Existing words are being used in new ways and thus their definition list is being expanded. Some words are being used less in some contexts which makes them archaic and their definitions obsolete. And there are new words being created on a constant basis according to new discoveries, new technology, and other progress in human society. So languages are a living entity that perpetually transforms and thus mastering them is a neverending process. And that makes learning it a bit annoying when approaching it with a tendency to just learn it once and for all and check it permanently as done.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Actually, I came to realize that such an approach is the core reason why I lack motivation in my life. Because whenever I make a decision there is a need for me to determine the outflow of events and thus estimate if the decision is aligned with what my goals are. Yet even setting goals is something I actually am avoiding due to so many options available out there. And in that sense, there are possibilities that I currently am aware of and there are all of the endless options that I even can not imagine that are possible to be manifested. Besides that things and possibilities that currently do not physically exist can be also created if only I come with new ideas and then engage in action to turn them into something tangible.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Thus life is a constant process of discovering what exists, what has existed in the past, defining and making sense existence, looking for own position in existence, defining yourself, realizing your past, current, and future influence on the existence, deciding about your purpose, vision, and mission, engaging in actions, stopping and reflecting on self, loosing, searching and finding self again, remembering and forgetting, expanding and contracting, exhaling and inhaling, creating and destroying, and then doing it over and over again in the perpetual cycle since existence is one and it can be in no other way that constantly inverting itself. And this is also why a torus is its best geometrical representation.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">When asking myself about what to do, there are two basic options. One is doing something where I influence the world outside myself and the other is doing something where I influence my inner world. I realized that for the most part of my life I wanted to influence the world outside myself, especially some members of my family due to my specific relationship with him. I got used to doing what that individual tells me what to do since I would then also get the things I wanted from him. And I was raised to be innovative and inquisitive in order to positively impress that man and others by presenting myself as someone how is more advanced than others.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Yet while excelling at things there was consistency and depth that were lacking. It was never about genuinely being attracted to doing something and then developing the skill to the level of high mastery in order to become a valuable expert who solves problems of other people. It was more about just craving for recognition from others and creating a superficial public image of someone who is worthy of being admired. Instead of experiencing a sustainable fulfillment by perfecting myself, I was hooked on short-term energetic experiences of good feelings created when others would praise me. Which consequently also created periods of feeling low, heavy, and tired as the energetic polarity. I realized that the only solution for myself is to priorities my own self-development in order to be able to truly excel in life. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">And when identifying what is the thing that I need to develop within myself in order to be more effective, I learned that it skills of self-expression and directing others through communication. I remember the storyline that came through when I did my first guided hypnotic regression to my first past life where I was in a female body. I got hanged by the crowd of peers who labeled me as impure after someone invading Wiking raped me. And I just let others hang me decided to remain silent due to losing hope in any kind of success by trying to convince them to change their anger-possessed minds by using words. And that is why I have been holding such deep sadness inside myself all these years since I did not see any way of how to make others comprehend and accept me as I am.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">However, when progressing on my path of self-awareness I realized that a coin has two sides. While expecting from others to treat me nice and with compassion, I asked myself what was my attitude towards them. And I realized that I did actually care for others and their lives. I lacked the social skills and ability to see others as one and equal. My whole life was just about displaying myself better than others and wanting to be praised. No wonder I was often met by being judged by others since I have been doing exactly the same towards them. So I could say that it was myself that I am actually sad about since I did not develop the skills and awareness about how to live in this word effectively and to see others as part of myself. I have made a lot of improvement about that yet there is much more to do.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">During introspection, I discovered that my communication skills are actually not so excellent as I perceived them to be. Sure I am able to read, speak, and write in Slovene and English language and I comprehend German and Croatian language well. Yet I realized I am lacking a lot of the basics knowledge about grammar and I could not even spell in English. Those poor foundations are what disabled me in being an effective communicator and to identify and correct mistakes in my writing and speaking. So I am now basically starting from scratch and learning every respect of what a language is and how to use it with utmost perfection. It is like I am with the age of 47 going into the first class of a primary school and discovering what is a verb, a noun, and other terms of linguistics.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I see that many adults who decide on a relationship and get their own children have the opportunity of reliving their primary school education experience while assisting their kids with their homework. Having kids is thus helpful for adults to refresh and improve their primary school knowledge, including core knowledge of the language. And since I do not have children of my own, I am disciplining myself to in a similar way rewalk my basic education since the public schools did a poor job of guaranteeing perfect integration of all subjects, leaving me inadequate in language, math, and many other skills. I am motivating myself on a daily basis to fill the holes in my core knowledge so that I will be able to stand and perform more confidently, with the ability to express myself with words and achieve my goals.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Recommended related educational audios from Eqafe:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/motivation-life-review">Motivation</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/reptilians-how-language-substantiates-the-mind-part-1-part-72" target="_blank">How Language Substantiates the Mind</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-nature-of-words-reptilians-part-183" target="_blank">The Nature of Words</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/encoding-communication-and-programming-relationships-part-1-quantum-systemization-part-29" target="_blank">Encoding Communication and Programming Relationships</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/we-do-not-even-see-ourselves-life-review" target="_blank">We do not even See Ourselves</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/mask-of-innocence-life-review" target="_blank">Mask of Innocence</a><br /></div>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-43323511852357131182020-08-30T19:52:00.003+02:002020-08-30T19:53:42.746+02:00Day 200: Increasing my capacity to care for others<p>In the past several weeks I experienced increased resistance to writing. One of the factors for that was my focus on doing business-related activities. Then what limited amount of remaining time in a day was my new commitment to rebuild and expand my English vocabulary by investing at least 1 hour per day doing that. Additionally to that my good friend asked me if I can help him to move. He sold his parent's house and bought a small farm with an old farm building. The new house owners wanted to have it emptied completely by the end the month so I assisted him with loading and transporting all the furniture and the rest of belongings to a new location or to a dump yard. During the time when he was the driver and I sat next to him, we had long talks about how to best educate children since he got a daughter that will soon become 1 year old. And we also talked about many other topics, like politics, since we both share the interest to improve the situation in this world via a peaceful democratic process. So after each day of assisting him, I also needed additional time to physically and mentally compose myself enough to return to my daily routine. <br /><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-all-i-wanted-was-to-be-cared-for" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="357" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCI_6LmUnPWoAz-2O3Zc5DcT6wiwMWCG8NHpPZS0Vd1hAR70M-7p3TPo3lqwTmy3xYFKpUtBxx4RZdbqE1yP3dxRKO7ilJX8O3OiCMNa47PHf4O1ljoBcECbc-uDnvjarGnHyojpCcyR0/s0/0200.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I admired my friend that I assisted to move for his passion and commitment in regards to provide for his child and for his business vision. He invested the money from the sale of the house into a farm and a nearby organic orchard and wants to make a living as a fruit producer since he is also a vegan. Currently, he travels to work in nearby Austria since the salaries there are double comparing to Slovenia. And he arranged to work 10 hours each day so that he works only 4 days per week which allowed him to spend a full day more with his daughter and her mother. However, since he is aware of how crucial it is for parents to be there for their children in the first years after birth, he plans to quit the current job soon and focus fully on his farm and the family.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">In regards to raising children in the best way possible, I have a lot of theoretical knowledge about that and I am looking for ways how to benefit others with it. From one perspective I would like to become a father however I do not like all that it takes in the current economic and educational system to deal with everything necessary to practically succeed in that perspective. As a child, I experienced a significant abundance of material things however there was a great lack of emotional stability and equal communication between my parents. I noticed how I have difficulties to move in terms of the business and money generation due to the inherited mind patterns and energetic addictions. So the ideal way for me to become a parent at the current state would be if I would be a stay-at-home dad and my wife would be taking care of the finances. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">However, just in case if some girl with a perfect business mind does not magically appear and want to have children with me, I am committed to continuing overcoming my current limitations and maybe even reach a state where I take care for the income and thus more confidently invite some female to create a family with me. So I am consistently pushing myself with doing as much of sales activities as possible and reading books and watching videos about how to become even more effective at sales. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Related Eqafe interview:<br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-all-i-wanted-was-to-be-cared-for">All I wanted was to be Cared-for...</a></div>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-25703155740664823812020-07-31T06:28:00.001+02:002020-07-31T06:28:50.595+02:00Day 199: Excitement about my new missionDuring my last 20 years of the personal growth process, I have been constantly searching for a solution to impact the world positively. I initially started by offering personal counseling and therapy services to individuals. However, I realized that with one-on-one sessions I would be able to impact the lives of only a small number of individuals so I was searching for better solutions. I was looking for a way of how to multiply my limited time to support a much bigger number of people worldwide. I joined different groups of people where we were collaborating on different transformational projects. And the group that excites me the most after all of these years is called <a href="http://desteni.org/">Desteni</a>. <br /><br /><div><br /></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><span style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/excitement-introduction-atlanteans-part-117"><img border="0" data-original-height="591" data-original-width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgn9lMgo9e_WfKmaN-I8gjgp63P9jNtsD56kWiEVX7YcKYuS_3ByHTuWiFKsk1_0ZbjBY1GbzwcktX8m2gHbMUkNVRf1uyPDCEX9quDdmX4kFn0QaF-WHUcdf5WPkuzAD5KIBINIXVH3ng/d/0199.jpg" /></a></span></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><br />The cool thing at the Desteni group is that they have created <a href="https://desteniiprocess.com/">Desteni I Process</a> series of online courses, including the <a href="https://lite.desteniiprocess.com/">DIP Lite</a> free course that can support thousands of people around the globe. And this is also where I learned how to effectively transform my thinking and behavior patterns by applying a very specific witing like demonstrated in this blog. I have been sharing links to Desteni resources with great excitement for many years however I have recently become even more excited about another solution that I became a part of. It enables me to take care of the financial part of my life while transforming the lives of people in their core. And it is so very simple yet effective solution for global transformation that many can not even grasp how it is possible that it produces so powerful results. I have started to apply is also for myself on a daily basis and am being consistently educated about it on a weekly basis. Since I see such great potential in as many people using it as possible, I became highly driven to share it with everyone, especially to a specific group of people who can benefit the most from it.<div><br /></div><div>That solution is motivating me to the level where I in recent days started to wake up naturally in the morning after sleeping only 6 hours or even less. For example, I woke up today at 4 am already and completely refreshed. I have realized that I have a limited time in this incarnation and want to use it as effectively to bring solutions to this world. I get up with great excitement about my new mission to empower people and invite them to also become a part of a global network of people who are dedicated to make this world the best place for all living beings. This mission also enables me to grow additionally since it gives me incentives to talk to other people. And talking to individuals that I do not know is something that many are not comfortable with. Parents usually tell their children that they should not talk to strangers and such belief is often transferred to the adult phase. Communicating with other people, especially via public speaking is one of the biggest fears that many have. And I have come a long way in recent years to transform it to the level where I am now very comfortable with speaking to anyone, even if I have never seen them before.</div><div><br /></div><div>However, what I started to notices in regard to my new project is that I started to become restless due to a perception that time is very precious and limited. I can not even imagine how until recently I have been able to live a relatively relaxed life with having our personal basic needs met and moving only so much to additionally make some slow progress in terms of my life coaching services that I started to offer early in the year 2020. I was actually searching for something that I could do for the benefit of others however I felt the lack of motivation to develop my services to a proper level. I have been craving for some kind of collaboration with others where we would create a synergistic effect. I am part of some global groups where we communicate on a regular basis however only via the internet and mostly just by texting. And such collaborations have not been able to provide me also with a source of income for me so it was basically only a volunteering way of participation. And now I am part of a project that has great potential to also generate a lot of revenue for me and we are communicating and supporting each other in a much more intense way via weekly Zoom video meetings.</div><div><br /></div><div>When one has found something very exciting there is a danger of creating an imbalance in daily life. And I have also started to see how I am getting restless and wanting to produce better results every single day. I am aware that when starting a new business one has to be very focused and dedicated in order to grow it to a sufficient level where it can be sustained with much less input of time and effort. And this is actually what I am good at since whenever I find something interesting, I dedicate myself to it fully and am very persistent with consistent movement towards achieving selected goals. I learned recently from a successful businessman that a crucial part of staying focused is a decision to say NO to a lot of things. In the early stage of life, it is good to say YES to lot of things in order to get many experiences and to thus find out what excites you the most and towards what you want to dedicate your life to. However the more you get experiences, to more things that distract you from your selected path you need to say NO. Highly successful people thus say NO to 99,99% of offers since they see the importance of staying laser-focused on directing themselves towards developing their own business.</div><div><br /></div><div>I am now in a stage in my life where I have tried out many things and am have discovered what I want to dedicate my life to and have selected my life purpose. So when I got introduced to a project that I am now focusing on, it highly resonated with me. It excites me to the level where I now even have to be careful not to invest too much of my time in it and to prevent a burn-out. While I am highly driven to produce results, I also learned that I can not be effective in the long-run if I compromise my personal mental and physical health. I am now managing my daily schedule so that I have sufficient rest and fun time. Because yes, we all have a limited time yet all the existence is nothing but a game that I as part of a creator am playing with myself. And bullying myself by blowing the perception of urgency to act out of proportions would result only in compromising myself. </div><div><br /></div><div>Here are some fine related educational audios on that topic if you want to contemplate more about it:<br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/excitement-introduction-atlanteans-part-117">Excitement series</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/an-ordinary-woman-part-1-life-review">Highs and Lows of our Experiences</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/building-your-business-the-soul-of-money">Building Your Business series</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/swept-away-death-research-part-1">Swept Away</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/self-forgiveness-on-the-experience-of-excitement">Self Forgiveness on the Experience of Excitement</a></div>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-63494305874877318492020-07-13T10:52:00.003+02:002020-07-30T09:23:51.120+02:00Day 198: My 20 biggest fearsI have become a part of a group where I was given the challenge of writing down 20 of my biggest fears and writing the related self-forgiveness and self-corrective statements like I learned to do so by walking the awesome <a href="https://desteniiprocess.com">Desteni I Process</a> online courses. I have already made a list using the spreadsheet app and here in my blog, I am now going to break them down and remove all the limiting believes that became a part of me and that create the friction between my mind and the physical reality at this moment that results in the creation of the energy called fear.<div><br /><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-living-fear" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="357" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLXPABFe2dyP_BmAfsi19MPfEFUnXaQw91RGPo7jfxLFq1EPZDDCLTw4IQFdJV_pqF5N9Yq4JcqXU8UtBvfiFjjMtkYgTRSFO1A3rzfJHkXOVzmU1Cv3zz3ETQqYz9qRMQOIl1q89uLWA/d/0198.jpg" /></a></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><ol style="text-align: left;"><li><b>Fear of food shortages and people starting to fight for it.</b><br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about the possible shortages of food in the future due to the effects of the global shutdown of many economic activities. I realize that I can not know what will happen in the future and if such a shortage will not happen in my lifetime. I commit myself to stop any thinking about the negative future scenarios however also to do everything that is in my power to prepare myself for food shortage by having enough food stored to survive at least for several weeks.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of dying and realizing how many things I have not realized while being in a human physical body.</b><br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear to die instead of realizing that whenever I think of dying I do not allow myself to be present here and to actually live. I commit myself to in every single moment anchor my awareness by focusing on my breath and respond to every single situation breath by breath. And to live this life within the realization that my current physical body is just a temporary vessel for my expression that I will exit when the time for that comes.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of forced vaccinations that can result in a decrease in my health.</b><br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being vaccinated without my consent and that the vaccine will have a negative effect on my health. I realize that I can not know what a specific vaccine that would be injected into my physical body will consist of. I commit myself when and as the moment comes when I will be forcefully vaccinated to use my ability to prevent any emotional reaction to it and thus lower its negative influence to a minimum.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of only digital currency being on disposal to use and someone taking away all my currency.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that the government will remove the cash from circulation and that only digital currencies will be available and thinking that that would increase the danger of others taking away my currencies very easily in a moment. I realize that despite currently cash still being available I actually like the comfortability of paying with digital currencies, preferably just by using my smartphone and thus not needing to walk around with a heavy bulky wallet filled with paper and coins. I commit myself to whatever happens in the future in terms of means of exchange to keep my focus on my breath and find solutions for myself to be able to survive and do business with others.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of having a toothache and being forced to get my COVID-19 test before being allowed to visit the dentist.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself that I will have to go through the current protocol of having to first go into a COVID-19 doctor's office to be tested for the new coronavirus before I will be allowed to visit a dentist. I realize that when and as I actually need to go to a dentist to call all the holistic dentists and ask them if they require me to be tested for the coronavirus. I commit myself not to think about the things that are actually not relevant for my current needs and to focus on things that currently matter while focusing on my breath and remaining here.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of implementation of 5G network and is being used to make me less able or even killing me.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that the implementation of the 5G technology will be able to be used to limit my mental and physical capabilities or even to kill me if some would declare me as a threat to the system of social control. I realize that I can not be sure what the 5G actually is and what influence will have to human physical bodies, and specifically to mine since we all have different predispositions and genetic structure. I commit myself to in the case of 5G implementation, to observe the possible influences of such technology to my mind and physical body, and to then only respond in order to remediate any negative effects.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of being forcefully chipped and having access to food and currency only if I am chipped.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that someone will insert a chip into my body without my consent and that I will then be tracked all the time or prevented access to food or currency in case if I do not obey the controllers. I realize that I do not know if such an event will actually take place and what kind of chips might be used. I commit myself to stop thinking about such negative possible scenarios since while I spend the time in my mind creating such images, I miss being here in reality and am thus wasting my potentials to create solutions that are best for all.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of my landlord knocking on my doors and starting to yell at me.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that my landlord will knock on my door and demanding things from me by yelling and projecting negative emotions onto me. I realize that while that might happen and I could experience the discomfort of such emotional relationship, I am able to direct such event with calming the situation down, explaining my current state, comprehend the needs and find a solution that would be best for me and the landlord in the short and long term.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of being forced to accept to start living with a new flatmate.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself that the landlord could insist on me moving into another part of the flat and to accept a flatmate. I realize that I am able to communicate with my landlord in order to achieve an agreement where I do not get a new flatmate and that I am projecting negative experiences of living with my previous flatmate that was very disturbing onto the imagination of the possible new flatmate. I commit myself to stop any thoughts and imaginations about the possible new flatmate and direct myself aligned to what is actually here in this moment.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of my car breaking down and not being able to execute distant personal meetings.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that my car would break down and that I will become less mobile which would decrease my ability to execute business-related activities. I realize that my car currently runs well and in case if some part of it breaks, I am able to get it repaired in a reasonable time. I commit myself to stop thinking about what in regards to things I possess or use might break and to rather focus on my breath in every single moment, be thankful for what I currently have, and make the best use of it.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of executing my professional activities the results not turning out being as I imagined.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing that I will not be able to succeed in achieving my business plans. I realize that I have been projecting my past failures into the future while not realizing that at that time I had many more fears which I later processed and that now the professional circumstances have changed a lot since then. I commit myself to engage in my professional activities with persistence, consistency, and willingness to learn which will definitely lead to becoming more successful in my profession.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of realizing that the selected business model would not be optimal for expected results.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to doubt that the current business model is the best in order to achieve the targeted results instead of realizing that it is constantly being developed and perfected. I realize that the best for me in order to find out if the business model will produce desired results is to practically test it and then realign it if necessary. I commit myself to focus on practical business movements and to remove my internal points of separation in order for my personal influence while applying the business model to be as small as possible.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of becoming overwhelmed when my business team grows significantly.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to imagine how my business team will in time grow and how I will not be able to handle directing every single business member. I realize that I am trying to use the limited capacity of my mind to predict the outflow consequences of my participation in the business instead of allowing myself to see in what way things will actually turn out and then respond to the situation in real-time. I commit myself to refrain myself from the overuse of my mind for prediction of the future and to have trust in myself that I will find a solution to every possible challenge that I will face.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of someone using any law to obstruct my personal and business activities.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that anyone will use any of the many laws that exist in this world and apply them to prevent me from achieving my personal and business goals. I realize that I am learning how the legal system works and have already found very effective ways to protect myself from any legal attacks. I commit myself to stop any thought that creates doubt about my ability to respond to any legal influence towards myself and to face them breathe by breath, word by word until all legal threats in regards all and any living beings are removed completely.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of missing the opportunity to have my own children and raising them in the best way possible.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that in this lifetime I will not make it to have my own children and that I might regret this fact someday. I realize that while I can not know how long I will live, I still have enough time to create a family and also the financial conditions for it, especially if I decide to focus on my business. I commit myself to accept any outcome in regards to the idea of me having children when and as I face the moment of death of this physical body of mine since every decision I have made so far about that has been made based on my best judgment according to the situation and environment that I found myself in.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of my marketing activities resulting in much fewer sales than anticipated.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that despite my best efforts I will not be able to with sales make such earnings as I wish to due to current global martial law, economies being shut down, people losing jobs, and having less money than ever. I realize that no matter how bad the economic situation is there will always be the ones who have enough money and interest for the product that I sell so it is just a matter of finding them and making a presentation. I commit myself to find ways to achieve my goals regardless of the economic situation if I decide to focus on the opportunities and potentials instead of finding excuses for feeling desperate.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of the government coming with some crazy restrictions that would harm the economy even more.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that our government will implement even harsher restrictions that will diminish the economy even more since they have announced the 2nd wave of the coronavirus outbreak and are again forcing us to wear masks in the closed public places. I realize that I can not have much influence on the decisions of our government however I have the power to decide how I respond to it. Thus I commit myself to whatever measures they will be implementing to remain calm, composed, protect my integrity, breathe effectively and move step by step in order to survive and collaborate with others into creating a world that is best for all.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of something unpredictable happening that would shock me to the extreme.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that something will happen that I can not predict and is similar or even more extreme than the current coronavirus global event. I realize that unpredictability is a nature of life since, despite the physical world enabling us a pretty stable platform to operate, the outflow of the consequences depends on the actions of billions of other people and the rest of living beings. Thus I commit myself instead of looking at the unpredictability of life with fear, to look it with excitement and anticipation of the surprises that make life fun.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of realizing that I have realized very little comparing how much there is to realize.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that whatever I decide to do, it will be based on my very small state of realization comparing to how much there is to realize about anything that exists. I realize that comparing my current me to my potential future me is the act of diminishing myself since I am constantly growing and expanding and there will be always something more that I can challenge myself with. I commit myself to stop competing for my current self with the imagination of self in my mind and to rather focus on defining my current weaknesses and making them stronger.<br /><br /></li><li><b>Fear of discovering that there is no point in doing anything since it is all just a game of illusions.<br /></b>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that I will someday come to the realization that there is no point in doing anything particularly since the existence and life is a subject of interpretation and there is no absolute meaning to anything. I realize that only the mind can have such conclusions of giving up and making no sense due to its limited capacity of comprehension and represents separation from the life that is here. I commit myself to instead of using the mind to direct me, to anchor my awareness in the physical, see the state of the physical, decide how I would like it to become, and they move into transforming it into what is best for all life.</li></ol><div><br />And here are some additional supportive educational audios from the Eqafe website:<br /><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-living-fear">Living Fear</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/reptilians-my-fear-companion">My fear companion</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/reptilians-the-power-of-fear-part-90">The Power of Fear</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/why-we-create-fear-instead-of-solutions-life-review">Why we create Fear instead of Solutions</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/money-fears-the-soul-of-money">Money Fears</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/stop-in-the-name-of-fear-life-review">Stop In The Name of Fear</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/fear-at-the-top-the-soul-of-money">Fear at the Top</a></div><div><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/don-t-want-to-make-a-mistake-life-review">Don't Want to Make a Mistake</a></div></div></div><div id="gtx-trans" style="left: 195px; position: absolute; top: 3063px;"><div class="gtx-trans-icon"></div></div>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-8620934530563340252020-06-28T13:54:00.008+02:002020-06-30T10:30:54.537+02:00Day 197: Changing my response to conditions that pressure meIn relation to my previous blog post, I am here continuing with looking at the accepted and allowed believes that I am limiting myself and losing my personal power with which is also being reflected in my still slightly persistent lower back pain. So when I am looking at the timeline of the back pain starting to occur, I see that it relates to me starting offering my coaching services in January 2020 which I decided for exactly with the starting point of empowering myself and being able to establish a more reliable source of income for myself. I created my business website, placed signs about my new services to office windows and the main building entrance, and started to discover what marketing strategies would work best for that line of business. There were three coaches who contacted me which coach new coaches how to be very successful at the coaching business however I did not want to focus on doing international online coaching like they are doing it. I wanted a real human connection and thus planned to go out and personally visit the local business managers and offer my coaching services to them.<br />
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Just when I had a plan to start going out on a daily basis and presenting myself to potential clients, the coronavirus shutdown occurred and my plans went down the drain. Many businesses in my local area closed down and I could not reach the owners as I initially intended. I considered the personal approach as something that would establish rapport much more effectively and I find online communication much more limiting in that respect. And the global shutdown was also something that was new and created a lot of insecurities in the lives of people. I considered coaching as a tool to support others at looking and finding solutions in themselves easier. However, I felt like I would not be able to help others during the corona situation effectively since their inner world became very unstable. It looked to me like my coaching services for others would be a waste of their and my time because the global situation out there has been constantly changing. Thus any solution that my clients would come to based on the coaching with me could soon become outdated. This is why I rather focused on doing my own research about what I and others could expect in the future based on the hidden global political agendas that were not reported in the mainstream media.</div>
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In other words, I used the global shutdown to retract, to be still, and to observe what the future will bring. However, I noticed now that some took different tactics and have seen the coronavirus crisis as a business opportunity. Slovenian business incubators even had lectures with titles like: “Never Waste a Good Crisis“ and encouraged the creation of startups that would focus on solving the new problems created by the global shutdown. Some people have thus worked on import or production of face masks and some have developed solutions in terms of how to work and study from home for example. Many have reacted to such activities with disgust since they treated the government measures as an act of war on people and everyone that would make a business out of it as an unethical war profiteer. And I also did not want to be seen as that. Even when I posted on my Facebook profile that I am offering a free initial coaching session to everyone who needs to find a new economic solution for themselves, most people placed a strong negative comment bellow it. Thus I saw others as being in shock and due to their fear of survival and that it was pointless for me to try to talk to them with common sense.</div>
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I was also influenced by the suggestions of other coaches never to execute a free coaching session. They saw it best as only to have a short free preliminary chat with a potential client in order to see if they are a good fit. And when offering free coaching others would not see it a valuable and would also not be sufficiently actively involved in their part of the coaching process in order to have the desired effect. I considered that since I have already in the past years produced over 500 vlogs that people can use for free to support themselves that it is fair that when I have professional coaching with others to be paid and thus fairly compensated for all my past efforts. I even had a perception that by me calling my contacts and offering coaching to them I would only disturb them even more and that leaving them in peace would be best to do. Because being left alone by others and having a quiet time is something that I personally enjoy as the necessary healing process after the period in my life where I suffered a lot.</div>
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My general perception was that many people have lost their jobs, a lot of businesses have closed, even permanently, and that there is a general panic going in our society. Yet I saw also that many kept their jobs, some businesses have flourished more than ever due to increased demand, and new jobs have opened as the response to the corona crisis. While many people are not much picky in terms of what kind of work they do, as long as they are able to perform it and earn good money with it, I am not so very used to work just to get me bye. One reason for that is that I have been employed by my father right after secondary school and after that, I have been self-employed and have been doing what I preferred. So the decision to do some work that does not resonate with me was from my perspective an act of giving up on myself and becoming a failure. And I was also concerned about what would others think about me if they notice me working some common and low-paying job. However, considering the current much more drastic global situation I am wondering if I should look for other opportunities just to generate sufficient money for the rent and food. Yet from another perspective maybe the corona lockdown has been enforced exactly for the reasons of population self-diminishment and giving up on doing what my life mission is would be their victory and my loss. <br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to perceive the coronavirus shutdown as an act of war on people and anyone that created profit by it as an immoral war profiteer. I realize that I am unable to know what were all the contributing factors that resulted in our government ordering us to stay at home and to wear a mask and what is the real agenda behind it. I commit myself when and as I see a massive change in a social situation and my mind is producing thoughts like: “This must be a result of the satanic global elite wanting to enslave humanity even more and kill us as many as they can so you must not participate in that plan in any way!” to stop and breathe. Instead of going into a self-victimization mode and refusing to accept the new reality, I rather see the new opportunities that have opened up and decide how to make the best of it for me to apply my personal potentials in order for the outflow of my actions to be best for all.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to financially rely on my father and expect that he will always find a way to get enough money for me in case if I am in financial trouble since he was able to do that all the times before. I realize that also the situation in his life can change dramatically like it actually did due to coronavirus shutdown and that eventually, he will die someday, so relying on him is not a sustainable option. I commit myself when and as I think about the possibility of not having enough money to cover for my monthly expenses and my mind is producing thoughts like: “You can always count on you father to get the money since he is very capable and proud and will never allow you to starve.” to stop and breathe. Instead of counting on my close relatives to assist me, I rather establish additional sources of income and create financial reserves in order to be safer in case of even more drastic unpredictable situations than the current global shutdown.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to live my life with the attitude to demand from others to provide a stable and reliable social system where I can relax, enjoy and express myself without fear of survival or going into a self-victimization tantrum whenever I notice that my current level of living comfortability has been even slightly diminished. I realize that I have become quite spoiled and also attached to what I have and experience on a daily basis instead of taking life more lightly, like a sort of game, where we all leave our human physical bodies eventually anyway. I commit myself when and as I notice my comfort zone being threatened and my mind is producing thoughts like: “I demand freedom, safety, and a guaranteed survival since I am entitled to it!” to stop and breathe. Instead of acting like a child, I man up, take care of my survival according to all the available options and do best to make this world best for all, allowing myself to enjoy the experience and live relaxed, without emotional attachment to anything.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to continue using memories of my past negative experiences and traumas to limit my expression and ignore all the abundant opportunities and potentials that are available to me. I realize that by stepping out of my comfort zone there is so much more that I can do and achieve. So I commit myself when and as I look at life and my mind is producing thoughts like: “The past is what you are and do not even try to do anything that is not a reflection of your suffering and trauma!“ to stop and breathe. Instead of constantly projecting what has happened in the past onto what is here, I end all projections and live my full potential.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be afraid of having a lot of followers and pupils, believing that I would not be able to handle the number of their comments, messages, and the influence of their opinions, especially the negative ones. I realize that this has been the reason why I have not expanded more in terms of executing lectures, seminars, and talks and have rather kept my business services small. I commit myself when and as I plan my business activities and my mind is producing thoughts like: “Keep it small so that you will be able to manage all the interactions with every client personally since other people are not reliable in terms of collaboration on the projects.” to stop and breathe. Instead of fearing to work with others, I learn how others are able to successfully run big operations so that also I will be able to direct a team of people for the mutual benefit.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be outraged and shocked by experiencing consequences of the coronavirus global shutdown due to the belief that humanity has reached so high level of awareness and that we are being so connected via the internet that surely no global catastrophe can ever happen again and we will be able only to increase the quality of life for all living beings on this planet. I realize that changes are the only constant in life and that I also like to innovate and experience new things, especially the ones that challenge me and help me grow. I commit myself when and as I look towards the future and my mind is producing thoughts like: “Look what kind of misery the humanity has caused in the past so be very afraid what will happen in the future.” to stop and breathe. Instead of looking into the future with fear, I decided to look at it with excitement in the anticipation of wonderful surprises that destiny is entertaining me with and making my life incredibly interesting.</blockquote>
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Related Eqafe educational audios to listen:<br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/under-pressure-life-review">Under pressure</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-waiting-for-my-life-to-happen">Waiting for my Life to Happen</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/what-are-you-waiting-for-reptilians-part-564">What Are You Waiting For?</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/taking-feedback-personally-quantum-systemization-part-158">Taking Feedback Personally</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/practically-working-with-failure-and-success-reptilians-part-573">Practically Working with Failure and Success</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/tension-in-working-environments-relationship-success-support">Tension in Working Environments</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/working-friendship-reactions-relationship-success-support">Working Friendship Reactions</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/bringing-yourself-down-when-others-are-down-quantum-mind-self-awareness">Bringing Yourself Down when Others are Down</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-greatest-challenge-is-you-quantum-mind-self-awareness">The Greatest Challenge is You</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/sharing-responsibility-vs-abdicating-responsibility-quantum-mind-self-awareness">Sharing Responsibility vs Abdicating Responsibility</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/practicing-responsibility-sharing-quantum-mind-self-awareness">Practicing Responsibility Sharing</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/losing-our-passion-for-life-in-routines-quantum-systemization-part-174">Losing Our Passion for Life in Routines</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/adapting-to-having-less-money-the-soul-of-money">Adapting to Having Less Money</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/working-through-your-blame-the-metaphysical-secrets-of-imagination-part-62">Working Through Your Blame</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/chasing-the-dream-the-soul-of-money">Chasing the Dream</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/i-don-t-want-to-be-an-employee-the-soul-of-money">I Don't Want to be an Employee</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/who-am-i-in-resistance-back-to-basics">Who am I in Resistance</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/uncertain-future-quantum-systemization-part-125">Uncertain Future</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/work-and-play-the-crucifixion-of-jesus-part-92">Work and Play</a>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-10651801397188954922020-06-17T16:23:00.001+02:002020-06-17T18:03:15.839+02:00Day 196: The mind blowing failures out of proportionIn relation to my previous two blog post, I will be here looking at some more related limiting beliefs that I am obviously still holding to. I estimated that in the previous post I hit the target and that I will be able to successfully release the lower back pain, however, it is still persisting. I also went to a mountain hike over the weekend that usually assists me at decreasing the back pain however it did not have much of an influence. During the hike, I have been listening to <a href="https://eqafe.com/">Eqafe</a> supportive educational audio on the topic of <a href="https://eqafe.com/searches?utf8=%E2%9C%93&q=victim">victimization</a> that I listed at the end of the previous blog post. That assisted me a lot to become more aware of the mechanism that the mind uses to trick us into applying the personality of a powerless victim. So with an enhanced perspective, I intend for this blog post to be even more effective in addressing the core issues for the lower back pain.<br />
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<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/self-awareness-steps-for-the-elite-introduction-part-1"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYuhyphenhyphenuZPviuDEEKjj_SZ3V1bVbUSf8CgFErrQUNT6wHyN4aSjCfSVCCHBqqdGJy2uz4T1bqteB_WnzqA72wQyXReiT_BCn5jNjS1P-IBPpinOTfdWjhICVk-i5wmtVxYHdFBE7ozqI_a0/s1600/0196.jpg" /></a></div>
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A major point that I became aware of is how I have been conditioned into a lifestyle where I do not have to think much about the money and where my survival is more guaranteed that in many other countries. First influential experience is, of course, my childhood where my parents took care that we had enough food on the table, I was raised in a peaceful post-word-war-II era with a socialistic system where the needs of every one were taken care of very good and cheap credits to build houses were widely available. My father progressed with the climbing of the corporate leader, became a part of the steel factory management, and then also developed the family business that has been very profitable and enabled us to build our own house. I had resources available to enjoy all kinds of sports and got my own car. The problem, however, was the relationships that eventually forced me into moving away with my girlfriends in order to maintain sanity and prevent additional degradation of my physical health.<br />
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However even after my girlfriend and I started to live in our rented apartment, my parents insisted on taking better care of the finances. Since they saw me paying our apartment rent with the salary that they gave me as wasting of their own money, they bought a small apartment on a credit and forced me and my girlfriend to move there as a much better investment of their money. And after I decided to start my own business due to continued conflicts in our family business work environment, they additionally forced my girlfriend and me into moving to a new larger apartment where they took care of the credit. They justified that decision as giving me my inheritance in advance as an act of equality in relation to my brother who after I moved out of our house had the whole flat available for himself. So while I started to build my own business, I had no monthly rent expenses, and thus I was able to invest most of the profit into business and develop it more easily and faster than most others. This also enabled me to take enough time for my personal growth after my girlfriend decided to leave me and move away due to all the mental pressures from the side of her and my parents.<br />
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When the financial crisis hit also our country in 2008 and I started to accumulate debt for the first time in my life. I decided to sell my apartment and move with my new girlfriend to Ljubljana. This was also the first time of me having a lot of liquid capital from the sale of my apartment so I allowed myself to live with much greater monthly expenses than ever before. Initially, I built my businesses mainly around my personal interests of survival, maintaining a small circle of family and friendship relationships, and self-expression. And especially after discovering <a href="https://desteni.org/">Desteni</a> in 2010 and visiting their farm in South Africa, my focus has become creating the biggest positive social impact possible no matter the cost. I also looked at the money from selling my apartment as a form of blood money that has been accumulated on the cost of the suffering of myself and many others. So all my following activities were a form of repentance to balance the bad karma of many generations within my bloodline. It was not my plan to spend all the savings from the sale of my apartment however all the sequence of events sadly lead to that.<br />
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For example, I wished for my girlfriend to assist me with the development of the Equality Store for the international sale of wearables for promotion of the <a href="https://eqafe.com/p/equal-money-future-of-money-volume-1">Equal Money System</a> however she decided to compensate her bad self-image with staring to attend the school of cosmetics in order to somehow feel more pretty. I decided to earn money by restarting my photography business for the duration of my study of psychology however the tsunami hit Japan and the delivery of the photo studio equipment took 6 months instead of expected 3 weeks. After my girlfriend finished her study, we created a mutual business where I executed personal counseling and she did the classic massage therapy. Until her outburst of envy towards my female classmates, death threat by her ex-boyfriend towards me, and Desteni's decision to end global promotion of the Equal Money System resulted in my decision to end the relationship with her and move to the city suburb. All the multi-level marketing opportunities that I engaged afterward and that looked so very promising at the beginning also all crashed down after a couple of years.<br />
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In the year 2013 when I moved to Maribor city, I finally spent all my savings, and I had for the first time in my life ask for the social support money. I felt very embarrassed about that since I considered that as an act of personal failure. In the following period until this day, I engaged in several business projects where I wanted to positively influence the global situation and where the project leaders promised me a lot of financial compensation for my work. Despite my best efforts, it resulted in no earnings in fiat currencies and a lot of earnings in non-exchangeable digital currencies. I definitely could at that time generate sufficient fiat currency if I had accepted working for a minimum salary, working something that I did not like, or moving and working in another country. However, I simply refused to make such a compromise and decided to focus on combining my passion, freedom of expression, and changing this world into something better for all living beings. I just can't figure out why fate has placed so big obstacles for me and tried to force me into giving up.<br />
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Like why just after I decided to return to offering personal services in form of a Life Coaching this year, the global Coronavirus shutdown happened which is very similar to the global financial recession occurring after I just started to offer my personal counseling services in the year 2008. It is like the matrix is preventing me from assisting others to raise their awareness by shutting down the economy of the whole world. And also why I got seriously injured when I started to become the leading moneymaker as the PIRS business directory salesman, why the Bitcoin collapsed right after I started to make profits by investing in it and why the Spurt and Equality Keys currencies have still not become convertible, which looks like the matrix is trying to prevent me from generating income in any kind of currency. And why only girls with conflictual personality came into my life instead of some girl with a business-oriented mind and strong emotional stability contacting me with a desire to be in a relationship with me which looks like the matrix is preventing me to create a family and raise the children that would with their high awareness present a threat to the current global system. I could go on with even more examples of my efforts being sabotaged by dear Mrs. Faith but let's leave it with these. Let's do now some correction of my thinking pattern as taught at the <a href="https://desteniiprocess.com/">Desteni I Process</a> online courses:<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto memories of the past experiences and to define myself with them instead of releasing myself from the past and making the best use of all the potentials that are available to me. I commit myself when and as my mind is producing thought like: “If you want to know what you are and what you are capable of, just look at your past and know that such will also be the future.” to stop and breathe. Instead of projecting my past into the future, I live every moment as a fresh start and expand myself by learning new skills, improving current capabilities and tapping into many available resources to multiply them to create a world of abundance where we all live in harmony, mutual support and collaborate as one and equal.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to copy the personality of self-diminishment and self-victimization from my parents and use it as a valid manipulation and survival method instead of realizing how harmful such character is since it contributed for my mother to totally ruin her physical health and eventually committing suicide. I commit myself when and as my mind is producing thoughts like: “It is very useful to show to others that you are week and incapable of taking care of yourself since they will feel sorry for you and help you to survive in this cruel world.” to stop and breathe. Instead of taking away my full power of creation as an equal in this world, I take charge of my life and stop the harmful pattern of victimization from transfering itself into the next generations once and for all.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to justify my envy and spite towards others by being a Slovenian national since our culture is to pull each other down and not allowing anyone to stick out and to succeed more than others. I realize that while in some other countries there is a more supportive environment for personal and business growth, I can still challenge myself by continuing living here and redefining what it means to be a Slovenian. I commit myself when and as my mind is producing thoughts like: “Be aware that you are part of a very small nation with a slave mentality who has little to know leadership character so you also behave like that.” to stop and breathe. Instead of defining myself by my nation or its general mentality, I decided to live free of any labels and direct myself by the principle of what is best for all no matter where my permanent residence is located.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to look at my past relationships and business experiences as a collection of failed attempts to achieve success due to not being married and having own kids yet and spending all the money from the sale of my apartment instead of becoming at least a millionaire by now. I realize that whatever my previous decisions were, they were all a result of my awareness and circumstances at that time that assisted me to grow and to become a better version of myself. I commit myself when and as my mind is producing thought like: “Look at many others in your age, like your younger brother who has a wife, two daughters, and a stable business, or look at Elon Musk who created a multibillion dollar business, so better be ashamed of who you are.” to stop and breathe. Instead of comparing myself to others of my age, I change my relationship to my memories of the past into something much more supportive for me and others.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing for my mind to ignore most of the positive experiences and achievements in my past and to for the most of time serve me only the memories of the negative experiences and achievements while at the same time blowing them out of proportions instead of realizing that number of positive past events and its effects far more exceed the negative ones. I commit myself to when and as my mind is producing thoughts like: “Just remember how many times in the past you started something and you failed so it is fair to see yourself as a loser.” to stop and breathe. Instead of focusing on the negative past memories, I consider all the events that happened in the past as the equal and natural outflow of the consequences, not of just my decisions but of all beings in this world combined.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to see myself as an insignificant individual with a very limiting mental capacity that is not able to handle the complexity of this world. I realize that experience of overwhelmingness is a result of me going into my mind and overthinking things that I face instead of becoming equal with every singel challenge and using mathematical precision to break it down and walk it bit by bit until I take full ownership of it. I commit myself to when and as I face a challenge and my mind is producing thought like: “Just look at how complex this thing is, imagine everything that you will have to do to handle it and how you are incapable of coming to a complete solution in your mind.“ to stop and breathe. Instead of using the limited capability of my mind to face a challenge, I use the support of the physical to write down all the components of the challenge, collaborate with others, delegate tasks, and use all the available resources to tackle the challenge until it is completed.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to lose interest in increasing my mental capacities, gathering new knowledge and enhancing my capabilities due to a belief that I am already quite old and that the capabilities of my brain will from now on only slowly diminish. I realize that no matter how old I am, I can apply many mental exercises, use the tools like <a href="https://www.techno-tutor.com/">TechnoTutor</a> to increase my processing power and my long-term memory, assist myself with eating healthy food, taking supplements and breathing pure oxygen, so there are many potentials that I have not tapped into yet. I commit myself when and as my mind is producing thought like: “You are on the half path of your life and you will from now only become older with only lower capacities that you currently have.“ to stop and breathe. Instead of allowing to project the negative future in my mind, I make the best use of all the possibilities to increase my mental capacity and allow for new discoveries and potentials to assist me in expanding myself even more that I can currently imagine. </div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to justify losing my interest in participaton of doing anything particular in this world due to seeing it as very unstable and unreliable with all the constant wars, financial crises, global pandemics, and possibly even worse catastrophic events in the future. I realize that the only constant in existence is change and that whenever I become attached to a certain form or pattern and project it in the future, I create an expectation and fear of change and loss that eventually results in a disappointment. I commit myself when and as I observe this world and my mind is producing thoughts like: “Look at how unpredictable this reality is and whatever you decide to do, there is a great probability that you plains will fail, so why even bother trying to do anything.“ to stop and breathe. Instead of being seriously attached to the expectation of a certain outcome, I take life easily, consider it more as a game where everything is constantly changing and where we all in time have to swap our bodies and expressions and where I am part of one as the life that can actually not be harmed by anything since there exists no one but itself.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for living the character of a responsible and serious person who demands to be taken seriously, expects others to be equally serious, and does not tolerate being laughed at by others. I realize that I have limited myself by such a character that I have used it to compete with my brother for the attention of our parents since he decided to live the character of a funny person that is skilled at extracting laughs from others as part of his survival mechanism. I commit myself to when and as someone is laughing at me and my mind is producing thoughts like: “Look at how they are making fun of you and bullying you, so resent to anyone that is not taking you dead seriously all the time.” to stop and breathe. Instead of holding onto my polarity extreme of a serious expression, I balance it by equally applying also the expression of relaxation, fun, and laughter towards myself and others.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to interprete anyone laughing at me as an act of attack on me and taking it personally due to my past experiences in the secondary school where some classmates picked certain parts of my body and made fun of them which resulted in me started to think that there is something wrong with how I look. I realize that I was partially responsible for others bullying me since they were responding to my low self-esteem and my self-perception of intellectual superiority however their decision of communicating their discomfort about that was a reflection of their lack of treating me as one and equal and a projection of their own insecurities and experiences of being bullied by others. I commit myself when and as someone laughs at me and my mind is producing thoughts like: “They are laughing for the purpose of bullying you so it is valid to feel uncomfortable and spite towards them.” to stop and breathe. Instead of allowing for words, sounds of actions to have influence over my emotions and self-image, I join laughing with them since some even say that a laugh a day keeps the doctor away and even I actually enjoy watching comedy on a regular basis very much.</div>
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Some additional related supportive educational audios from the <a href="https://eqafe.com/">Eqafe</a> website:</div>
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<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/self-awareness-steps-for-the-elite-introduction-part-1">Self Awareness steps for the Elite</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/a-chat-with-memory">A chat with memory</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/overanalysing-memories-life-review">Overanalysing Memories</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/friends-and-memories-quantum-systemization-part-34">Friends and Memories</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/physical-memories-reptilians-part-241">Physical Memories</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/my-life-of-constant-feeling-of-not-doing-enough-life-review">Always Feeling like 'I'm not doing Enough'</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/resentment-practical-support-atlanteans-part-134">Understanding Self Pity</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/haunting-memories-quantum-systemization-part-36">Haunting Memories</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/a-joker-life-review">A Joker</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/what-s-so-funny-quantum-physical">What's so Funny?</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/self-discovery-and-laughter-quantum-physical">Self Discovery and Laughter</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/sunette-spies-the-genuine-smile-of-laughter">The Genuine Smile Of Laughter</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/flexibility-and-flow-with-bruce-lee-the-crucifixion-of-jesus-part-100">Flexibility and Flow with Bruce Lee</a></div>
Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-9898030576150632662020-06-12T11:45:00.000+02:002020-06-12T11:45:54.748+02:00Day 195: Exposing My Justifications for Self-victimizationAs I have exposed within the previous blog post, I have been experiencing points of limitation that have been also reflecting in the slight back pain that has been persistent for the last couple of weeks. According to the <a href="https://desteni.org/desteni-material/blog/veno-structural-resonance-part-2-phase-14">Structural Resonance document</a>, the location of the pain indicates that this is related to the POWER point. As explained also in the 2-part educational audio <a href="https://eqafe.com/p/lower-back-pain-part-1-quantum-physical">Lower Back Pain</a> at the <a href="https://eqafe.com/">Eqafe</a> library, it is mostly related to patterns of judgment and suppression about the things that one sees within yourself. So whenever one compromises self, makes self inferior or less than, or creates a consequence or gives self up for something or someone, and through that diminishes the power of one's expression, the potential of one's life, and thus victimizes self, the lower back will flare-up. It is also a consequence of running from self, not having enough time for self, and being occupied with doing things for others. And not allowing self during the day to take time to self-reflect and change.<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-the-victim-of-judgment" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="357" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuz6yqjsMhn59zY1sOJMcUTjRj2M3uXV1rFpD0QQNsZnn9kP04N4_y9cmGrSg41IxmEH-8muzCSW3HvTADn6V8Jj_Zt1jbuCIiNrWuZQDdqqX6DEQXy8OX6D7A8bf1XmD9n-iUsFFQ8pM/d/0195.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div style="text-align: left;">So definitely I can look at the decision that I will be offering services of coaching as a possible point of limiting my self-expression. From one perspective I decided for the profession of coaching as the form of deliberate self-limitation since there are countless numbers of options for decisions in every single moment about what to do. Thus I feared that I will not be able to develop a business and consequently get enough money to sustain myself if I do not limit myself. This actually is not true since I do have the option to continue living on social support by continuing to be interested in every single thing that I stumble upon and be more of a curious researcher of life that is not focusing on any particular part of assistance. Yet during the coaching sessions, I am kinda performing such research since I am listening to life experiences of others and thus learning about new things and expanding myself.<br /><br />I can say that what I find the most limiting in the coaching business is the scheduling process and all the stress related to that. So the first phase is to inform others about my service and attract them until they decide to order it. The next step is to book a meeting. And whenever I have something in my calendar there is the need for me to be prepared for that event. Since time is a very intangible thing and also relative, it requires regular attention of time-measuring devices. So instead of being relaxed here, I have to compare the booked time with the current time displayed on a clock, calculate the time difference and estimate how many things I will be able to do until it is expected from me to execute the coaching. Due to my desire to be punctual a not wanting to miss or forget any scheduled meeting, I become restless and can not fully focus on things that I also want to do besides the coaching.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">This restlessness or nervousness increases especially with the scheduled time approaching. If I have nothing scheduled during a day I, for example, eat whenever I am naturally hungry, rest when I get tired, and for as long as I wish and do whatever I feel doing at any specific moment. And when I have meetings scheduled I have to plan all activities so that I am not so hungry during coaching sessions and also not too full to distract me from being able to perform as coach effectively. Also, I am seeing how the weather or low atmospheric pressure makes me more sleepy and tired. Since coaching sessions are booked at least hours if not days or weeks in advance, I can not tell how good will I feel at the time of having to perform coaching so I can not assure to be the best that I can be during each coaching.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Next, there can be many issues also from the side of coachees. Like they forgetting the scheduled meeting, them not feeling well, or being late, or in some times also arriving too early. So this also creates the need from my side to send reminders to clients, check the situation from their side before the meeting, and becoming prepared a bit early before the scheduled time. And then if they are late I also become nervous, disappointed and angry end even more if they do not show up at all. So all this planning and worrying disturbed my inner peace and does not allow me to stay relaxed. It was less stressful when I did a creative work and by getting one client, I could do just one job for them for hours, days, weeks, or even months. A business of coaching is quite different since sessions are as short as just half an hour and usually not more than two hours long. So I have to meet many clients in one day to be fully booked.<br /><br />And while the design work was something visual, the coaching is a form of inner transformation that is much more intangible. It requires me to listen and remember what others are telling me, process what I have heard, decide about my response, and repeat the whole process over and over again. The fear here is that I will forget the information and not be able to effectively execute the reflective part of the coaching. So I take notes during coaching which I do by hand in case of life coaching and in the form of typed computer notes when executing online sessions. And while some other forms of conversational supports are a more one-time thing, coaching is usually a long process that is being performed in several sessions within several weeks or even months. Thus it requires me to remember or to keep records about the coaching related to the previous sessions so that I can assure that goals set in the initial coaching session are being reached.<br /><br />This is also why many coaches do not charge their services by the hour but offer different packages. They are finding out what the needs and desired goals of the prospective clients are and then they estimate what package would fit them best. Such shaping of services is something new to me and I have yet to learn the benefits of it for me and the clients and how to apply it also into my coaching practice. There were also some coaches that contacted me in order to teach me how to succeed and earn a lot as a coach however no one resonated with me and I found their approaches something that I did not want to use. Most rely on international video coaching from their homes and using social media to get the clients. However, I got a bit tired of sitting in from of computers for long hours and prefer to meet clients in person so I planned to personally visit the potential clients in my local area. And just when I was to go out to do that, the Coronavirus quarantine started to be enforced, so I became quite frustrated about how unpredictable events are preventing me to execute my plans over and over again.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Then I also wanted to connect with other coaches in Slovenia in order to pick their brains and learn what business model works for coaching best for our nation. While the existence of a coaching method has been something that I discovered just recently, I was surprised for how long it has been used in my country and what level of standards have been established for that profession. A coaching society of Slovenia has members claiming that one can simply not perform as a good coach without having training that took at least a couple of years and regular supervision. I considered having performed very well as a coach for my past clients since many had so deep breakthrough moments that surprised even me. And I have many years of other kinds of studies about how the mind works, including measurable progress at my personal process of inner transformation, so I had high confidence in my abilities. However, after reading about how others are defining a coaching profession, my self-esteem in that area dropped a bit.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Throughout my life sequence of events developed me into becoming quite self-reliable in terms of learning the necessary knowledge to be able to do what I desired. And I also did not need any confirmation of my peers in order to gain sufficient self-confidence to work in certain areas. However, I noticed that what I lacked were depth and connections. In my life, the environment and people in my surrounding changed quite frequently so I learned how to function independently. And many experiences with other people were pretty negative so I also learned that others can not be trusted. I do fear that if I join any professional association, others will again start to limit me and influence me negatively. This is the reason why I prefer to work and also to live alone since I have already enough work with facing my own mind and lack the capacity and time to be able to also address the point of separation in the minds of others. Or so has been my justification for living in my current comfort zone.<br /><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left;"><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define my chronic feeling of sadness and heaviness as disappointment and powerlessness as the result of seeing others as being possessed by their minds to the level of not being able to comprehend me and seeing me as one and equal. I realize that I have been, and still am to a level, possessed by my own mind and thus equally unable to fully comprehend others and treat them as one and equal. Thus I am actually sad about how I am possessed by the mind and not yet sufficiently being able to direct others to completely drop their possession which is also what I want for myself. I commit myself when and as my mind is producing thoughts like: “There is no use of trying to release others from their minds since you are not capable of doing that so best to just protect yourself by living in isolation.” to stop and breathe. Instead of feeling sorry for myself, I look at my achieved progress of releasing myself from the mind and what progress was made by others and continue to walk the process of supporting myself and others towards the total release of any mind possessions in the whole humanity.<br /><br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define others as individuals who will sooner and later hurt me due to becoming blinded by the energy of their minds and emotions and that this is the reason why it is best to develop myself professionally alone. I realize that whenever others have harmed me it was due to my own separation within my mind that rendered me incapable of seeing and treating them as one and equal since I have been purely socialized and resonated superiority since this is how I have been raised by my parents who struggled with a feeling of inferiority. I commit myself when and as my mind is producing thoughts like: “Do not join any professional group since you will not fit in and they will not be able to accept you as an equal.“ to stop and breathe. Instead of fearing others and losing hope in advance, I join professional networks and take full self-responsibility about how others respond to my presence, words, and actions.<br /><br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to firstly get excited and uplifted about seeing the potential and after a while of doing that thing to lose the excitement soon after I face obstacles and challenges of moving towards that direction. I realize that I have allowed myself to be directed by the good feelings of the positive expectations and thus experiencing strong highs and lows instead ob directing myself based on the principle of what is best for all and pushing myself through every kind of energetic resistance with dedication, persistence and firm focus. I commit myself when and as my mind is producing thoughts like: “You have the right to feel heavy since you have experienced disappointment so take sufficient rest to gather enough positive energy to move you forward.” to stop and breathe. Instead of allowing myself feelings of emotional tiredness, I take time to reverse-engineer the timeline of events that I have used as justificaton for such feelings and remove any energetic conditions so that I can be directed purely by the principles.<br /><br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to lose interest in moving myself and doing anything particular due to accepted belief that there is no stability in this existence, that it is just a game or a play without any firm rules and that no matter what kind of goal I set it will avoid me achieving it. I realize that while there are theories that everything is energy and vibrations and that there is nothing tangible, the physical world does actually stand the test of time and is here and quite stable no matter if I believe differently. I commit myself when and as my mind produces thoughts like: “This world is just an illusion so by doing anything in it you will just be trying to make this illusion real.” to stop and breathe. Instead of believing my mind what is telling me, I realize that the problem is that the mind which is an actual illusion is trying to turn reality into an illusion by constantly taking my attention away from my breath and from what is actually here. Thus I decide to ignore any thoughts that justify me not moving in this world and do as many movements in a day to make this physical world the best place for myself and all others.<br /><br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that others will use words against me and enforce to consider their words as more powerful since they have labeled them as a rule or a law. I realize that others can have the power over my words only of I react to their words with emotions and that I am able to stand and speak for myself and explain in common sense that all words have equal power. When and as I receive a letter or a message from anyone and my mind is producing thoughts like: “They are citing a law so I must fear the enforcement in order to avoid harmful consequences for myself.” to stop and breathe. Instead of assuming the power of others through their words, I take equal power of my words to respond to them and disqualify every point of assumed agreement with me which has not been established between myself and others as direct agreement within full awareness.</div><div><br /></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be a quiet guy who learned that silence is the best defense and that it is not much use of trying to explain others what I see and feel since they will not be able to comprehend me. I realize that while the words are symbols to whichever one can have a different definition and emotional energies attached, there offer a significantly clear form of communication that I can use to interact with others. I commit myself when and as my mind is producing thoughts like: “The ultimate power is being completely quiet since it is futile to explain anything to others by using words.” to stop and breathe. Instead of giving my power away and victimizing myself by projecting a negative income no matter which words I use, I do my best to use words to come to an agreement with all the others where interests of all involved are being considered so that we can co-exist in a bigger harmony.<br /><br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not being aware of the power of asking and using assumptions about what others think, say and do instead of cross-referencing things by placing questions until I am sufficiently clear about what the reality actually is. I commit myself when and as see the words and actions of others and my mind is producing thought like: “Use your intuition to create an explanation what is the reason and meaning for others saying and doing things and do not disturb and take their valuable time with unnecessary questioning.“ to stops and breathe. Instead of interpreting the words and actions of others in my imagination, I stick with the physical and verify the facts so that I can avoid being in a wrong state of interpretation as much as possible.</div></blockquote><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Some related supportive educational Eqafe audios:<br /><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-the-victim-of-judgment">The Victim of Judgment</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-the-taking-this-personally-victim">The 'Taking this Personally' Victim</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-a-victim-of-bullies">A Victim of Bullies</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/deliberately-sabotaging-my-own-change-part-152">Deliberately Sabotaging my Own Change</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/self-victimization-2013-the-future-of-consciousness-part-34">Self Victimization</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/self-victimization-stunts-your-growth-2013-the-future-of-consciousness-part-37">Self Victimization Stunts Your Growth</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/from-self-victimization-to-self-empowerment-2013-the-future-of-consciousness-part-38">From Self Victimization to Self Empowerment</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/victim-of-your-memories-2013-the-future-of-consciousness-part-39">Victim of Your Memories</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/it-s-too-late-for-me-the-future-of-consciousness-part-78">It's too Late for Me</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-consequence-of-suppression-quantum-systemization-part-143">The Consequence of Suppression</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-difference-between-speaking-up-and-voicing-yourself-part-1-life-review">The Difference Between Speaking Up and Voicing Yourself</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/victimization-vs-ownership-of-skills-life-review">Victimization vs Ownership of Skills</a></div></div>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-51305025820716991452020-06-06T16:26:00.002+02:002020-06-06T17:37:49.437+02:00Day 194: Allowing myself to be pushed to push myself to push othersIn January 2020 I took a certified Life Coaching course. I became very excited about how powerful the coaching approach is in terms of assisting coachees in a relatively short time period to reach very high awareness of their life situation, to identify the obstacles, and to find solutions to overcome them. I found coaching to be something that I can deeply impact others by while allowing me not to activate my past selfish character of wanting to feel good by impressing others with the amount of advanced knowledge that I acquired. The fact that coaches are not supposed to be people who give advice, consult or teach and that their main purpose is to only mirror coachees, felt very liberating to me. However, there are some aspects of the coaching business that I do not like.<br />
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I learned from one of the coaches who is teaching his Natural Enrollment Method that establishing trust is an important part of the process to get clients. And it takes a lot of time to build rapport to the level where others become comfortable with opening themselves to you as a coach. So while coaching is very powerful it also requires readiness from the coachees to be vulnerable and courageous for them to get the most out of the coaching process. There must be a willingness to change and investment of time and money from their side in order for the coaching process to begin. And for that to happen there is a requirement from me to initially invest a lot my time and money in order to present the power of the coaching process to them and also to present myself as someone who is highly qualified for effective execution of such services and that I am also someone who they can trust with absolute certainty in terms that I will keep whatever they share with me to myself.<br />
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In recent months due to the Coronavirus or Covid-19 global event, I found it hard to get enough clients for my coaching business. One factor was my own fears about how far the changes within society will go and how that might influence me personally in a negative way. So all the media information that portrayed the virus as something very dangerous and the quarantine and economy shutdown as something justified definitely distracted my ability to focus on running a coaching business. Instead of investing my time in promoting my services, I spent many hours in research what is actually going on behind the scene of supposed global virus pandemic. And I have been occupied a lot by sharing interesting discoveries about what is the most probable truth all over the social media networks. I also had doubts that I would actually be effective with my coaching services to assist others since the global situation has been changing very fast and has impacted everyone extensively.<br />
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What I also noticed is that with the coaching business I definitely am pushing myself out of my comfort zone and consequently I have been experiencing a resistance. A point that I find most challenging is the energetic addition to feeling good. A great number of my past activities have been driven by wanting to prove to others that I am better than them in terms of my knowledge and skills. Consequently, in order for me to maintain my status as a superior being, I did not allow others to reach my level of excellence. That manifested in the form of being envious towards others, analyzing their activities and exposing any of their imperfections, and bullying them for that. So while I am now pushing myself to genuinely assist others to become the best version of themselves, I sometimes experience energy lows due to the persistence of the previous wiring of my mind.<br />
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Coaching has also introduced a new dynamic to my life in terms of scheduling. Previously I have been working on projects where I did not have to be so strict with time. For example, when I was doing a creative job and someone ordered me to produce some design or a photo, those were projects that took days, weeks or even months to complete. So just one client kept me occupied for a long time and I had the freedom to work on the project whenever I felt inspired during the day and thus not having to look at the clock very often. And in regards to working for my father, I fit his needs the most if I am available for him as soon as he calls me and to work as long until what he needs from me has been completed. Thus I find it more comfortable if there are others who contact me and give me work because they know what to expect from me and I can take all the time that is needed for me to complete the works to a level that I am satisfied with. And I preferred to have as much free time as possible after executing my creative work until I would be given the next order.<br />
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At the business of coaching, there must be people who order the coaching services in order for themselves to be pushed out of their comfort zone. In order for this to happen something has to happen for them to motivate them into desiring to be pushed out of the comfort zone by the method of coaching. And for me to sell the coaching method in general and then me as the coach that others would want to hire, I have to initially push myself out of my comfort zone. So I am also pushing myself to be in groups of people like <a href="https://destonians.com/">Destonians</a> that push me to increasingly push myself to push others and thus we have become many who are pushing each other out of our comfort zones in order to break free from of our limitations and to expand ourselves as much as possible. Consequently, we would in time not push each other down anymore due to desire to be more than others but push others up to the level where we can coexist as equals and live our utmost potentials.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define my father as someone that I must maintain my relationship with my whole life since I owe him for raising me and that I have to take care for him when he will be older and less capable similar than he took care for me when I was a todler and also less capable of taking care for myself. I realize that my relationship with him is based on him wanting me to feel like I owe him by him telling me many times that I have not repayed yet even for the milk that he purchased for me in my childhood years. I commit myself whenever my father wants me to do something and my mind produces thoughts like: “I have to serve him fast and well since I owe him my life.” to stop and breathe. I then with gratefulness for what he has done for me consider how I can fulfil his current needs however without allowing him to extort things from me by diminshing me and making me feel bad since that is just his projection of his own lack of self-trust and feeling of inferiority as the consequence of his childhood experiences that include loosing his father at a very young age.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to consider opinion of my father as more important that opinions of others and consequently doing mostly things which I can impress him with. I realize that by me wanting to impress my father I am equally diminishing myself like he is diminishing himself by wanting to impress others and consequently I am responsible for this limiting pattern of selfish interest and energetic addiction to continue in our bloodline. I commit myself when and as am deciding what to do, and my mind produces thoughts like: “Do something that you will be able to impress your father positively as much as possible with so that he will be proud of you.” to stop and breathe. Instead of that I decide for activities where I consider all life as equal and that have a long-term consequence outflow that are best for all being in this world.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I would not be able to handle big projects since I get exhausted alreday by doing small projects, especially when I do design activities for my father. I realize that feeling of exhaustion comes from the negative energy of feeling heavy as the polarity of my desire for the positive energy of upliftment that is generated when I feel proud and as someone more after I have done something for my father and he then praises my work, especially in front of other people. I commit myself when and as I do things for other people, especially for my father and my mind it producting thougths like: “Do things in such a way that you will be able to feel good about yourself since positive feelings are what life is all about.” to stop and breathe. Within the realization of how any energetic experience, regardless if being negative or positive, is exhausting my physical body and eventually creating the feeling of polarity oposite, I decide for my starting point for doing anything to be creation of something paractical and tangible, that contributes to making this world a better place for all.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to present my advanced knowledge and computer skills to my father with intention to impress him and intimidate him in order to maintain my superiority towards him instead of realizing that I am by such attitude being the same kind of bully that he has been many times towards me in the past. I commit myself when and as I communicate to my father and my mind is producing thought like: “Show him that he is not able to grasp everthing that you are capable of knowing and doing so that he will be able to admire you.” to stop and breathe. Instead of that I decide when and as I communicate with him to become one and equal with him in terms of using vocabulary that he is able to understand and to also take time to teach him computers skills so that he can increase his capability of independently using the latest gadgets and devices. </div>
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Some additional related Eqafe supportive audios:<br />
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<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/pushing-and-pulling-time-kryon-my-existential-history">Pushing and Pulling Time</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/moods-ruled-my-life-life-review">Moods Ruled My Life</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/daddy-issues-life-review">Daddy Issues</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/despite-my-best-intentions-life-review">Despite My Best Intentions</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/my-life-of-absolutism-life-review">My Life of Absolutism</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/inequality-and-separation-in-your-mind-reptilians-part-345">Inequality and Separation in Your Mind</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/pride-reptilians-part-404">Pride</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/discovering-self-pride-life-review">Discovering self Pride</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/losing-self-value-through-validation-life-review">Losing Self Value Through Validation</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/asking-for-accepting-help-quantum-systemization-part-112">Asking for & Accepting Help</a>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-79684021928425418262020-05-30T17:32:00.001+02:002020-05-30T17:32:35.739+02:00Day 193: Tricks and Traps of being a Grammar Nazi Recently I read a finalized document with a list of words in relation to some projects created by other authors. Some words were singular and some were compound words of two singular words. However, all of the compound words were missing hyphens and thus they were grammatically incorrect. I then posted my observation to a chat group with the authors of the list and started to explain how using the hyphens is important in order to convey the message correctly and avoid misunderstandings. I compared writing words similar to the writing of mathematical formulas where if separators are committed, the final result of the formula will be different than expected. I attached a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hge24Nq4LOI">Quantum Language video</a> with a clear explanation of how low grammar skills make you vulnerable to manipulations from the legal system and how using the correct grammar can empower you.<br /><br />
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However, I was pointed out that I can not expect everybody to comprehend words in the same way as I do and that this is beyond my control. I rephrased their answer and what came out is that I was misunderstood because I started to explain the importance of using hyphens and presenting them as a mathematical equivalent instead of just simply explaining that I suggest some grammatical correction of the word list. When I looked at why I decided for a more complex explanation I realized that previous to that I have pulled up a recent memory where I noticed someone else also avoiding hyphens when writing compound words. So I associated both events and compounded it myself in my mind as something that needs to have a deeper explanation because I saw it as a repeating pattern. And I considered the list of words as a document that others will use to learn how to correctly write compound words and thus damage with long-term consequences would be created. Besides that, I already expected from the authors of the list to be more responsible in terms of using correct grammar so I emotionally reacted with disappointment and outrage.<br />
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What also came up in the further discussion was that during communication with other members in the groups one should not be so careful about every single grammatical mistake. Because members are from all around the world and each of them is on a different level in terms of language skills. So the point of working together is not to perfect the language but to achieve other the goal of the group that is beyond the vocabulary. That reminded me of the event where year are I have been speaking to a friend of my father about some advanced discoveries and I have perceived my way of communication with him as something that is very normal. However, he told me that he does not comprehend what I am saying, despite us speaking the same language. That surprised me since I could not see at that time how I did not make any effort to level my way of communication to match the vocabulary of the person that I am speaking to. In the past years, I already discovered that one of my characters or behavior patterns is trying to impress others with the advanced secret knowledge that I have gathered. And I have not been only sharing the knowledge for the purpose of impressing others and feeling good about my superior know-how but have also used more advanced vocabulary and grammar for the same purpose.<br />
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In a similar way, the legal system works since it uses vocabulary and grammar that is quite different than how common people communicate. They even have their own Black's Law dictionary where definitions of the words are different than in common dictionaries. My language research was thus also for the purpose of protecting myself from any legal attacks by others. However, I have never pushed myself so far to really excel at grammar, not in Slovenian, nor in the English language. Previously my motivation was self-centered and energy-based and I commit myself to change this. I commit myself to slow down and to perfect my Slovenian and English language skills for the purpose of better communication and collaborating together to bring a better world and to also use Quantum Grammar to effectively establish agreements and protect those who are not able to do so due to their weak language skills.<br />
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Additional supportive audios in regards to this blog post:<br /><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-value-in-vocabulary-life-review">The Value in Vocabulary</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-nature-of-words-reptilians-part-183">The Nature of Words</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/reptilians-how-language-substantiates-the-mind-part-1-part-72">How Language Substantiates the Mind</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/reptilians-language-the-sceptre-of-creation-part-1-part-70">Language: the Sceptre of Creation</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/encoding-communication-and-programming-relationships-part-1-quantum-systemization-part-29">Encoding Communication and Programming Relationships</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/interview-request-who-am-i-as-language">Who am I as Language</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/interview-request-equalizing-to-language">Equalizing to Language</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/interview-request-unconscious-effects-of-reacting-to-language">Unconscious Effects of Reacting to Language</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/is-your-communication-sound-secret-history-of-the-universe">Is Your Communication Sound</a>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-30058230321919609762020-05-18T10:13:00.002+02:002020-05-19T07:00:12.732+02:00Day 192: My greatest fearsWithin one of the recent chats of our <a href="http://desteni.org/">Desteni</a> support group for self-perfection, we were discussing how to face the emotional challenges related to the Coronavirus or Covid-19 global shutdown. It became clear that what the majority of people are afraid of the most is not becoming infected with the virus and becoming sick but something else. One of the biggest fears, in general, is, of course, dying however since the death statistics were not as bad as presented in public media, that was not the main issue. The main problems that people saw were related to a lack of food that could cause starvation and as it was also evident from popular memes, the biggest fear was lack of toilet paper, lol. Except that in Slovenia the product that people have purchased the most was actually the yeast. I am now also going to look at what my biggest fears for me personally are in relation to the recent global situation.<br />
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So as I wrote in my previous blog post, the biggest change for me was that the source of income from my father that I have been relying on was gone and thus I was not able to pay for the rent anymore. However, in relation to that, the actual fear was that the landlord would lash out on me with anger and thus disturb my inner peace with a projection of his emotional energy. Or maybe he would even demand that I move out of my current apartment. And this situation was also related to my feeling of shame and discomfort since several years ago I was also not able to pay for the rent for several consecutive months. I still owe him that money and occasionally the landlord still brings this point up and I feel uncomfortable about that. In a way, I did pay him for that missing rent however it was in the form of alternative digital currency that was expected to become convertible to fiat currencies very soon however that did not happen to this day. So regardless of him having the funds on his account he, equally like me, is not able to use it in a practical way. And also a girlfriend of the landlord that lives nearby has several months ago made an attempt to convince the landlord to make me move out due to her predictions that I will not be able to pay for the rent due to her false perception that my monthly income was far less than it actually was. Thus I am also uncomfortable that her predictions became true although the actual cause now is something very different and also she could not predict that. I have read that currently, one-third of the people in the United States can no longer afford to pay for the rent so knowing that I am not the only one with such a challenge does assist me a bit. And what I see is that beneath this feeling of shame and discomfort there is my old main pattern of fearing to be judged by others and not wanting to display any of my mistakes publicly. My father at the end of each year has been proudly announcing to the world that he is completely debt-free and I also wish to be able to say that however in recent years I was not able to do that.<br />
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What is also related to the lack of money is my dependency on social support money for the past several years that is also something that I am not proud of. Because of that my father is seeing me as a looser and has shamed me many times and I do not want to experience that ever again. However, I am not so much concerned about what my father says since I have realized that he is speaking from his own insecurities about himself that he compensates with a craving for attention from other people and the need to be recognized in public as a good person. And I also do not want money to be the main focus in my life since it is just an arbitrary means of exchange in ways that are hard to wrap the head around it. Some people are allowed to create money out of thin air in abundance while others are not allowed that and are even prevented to get it enough to support themself with it properly. Besides that, there are constant periodic financial crises that create worldwide depressions. So regardless of how much money someone has, it can all be taken away in a moment by some completely unexpected event. Consequently, I also do not want to be attached to money while I actually have always been able to find ways to have my basic needs met. And I am researching options and development of global events that have the potential to turn the money into something more stable and fair.<br />
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The next point that is also related to money and survival is the vaccination agenda and 5G network. I watched many documentaries that explain how the existence of coronavirus has been deliberately blown out of proportions in order to enforce mandatory vaccination. And that many of the cases where people got sick or even died were connected to the rollout of the 5G network that influenced the human body in a negative way. Then also how if we allow the vaccination agenda and further implementation of 5G, each of us could become controllable and enslaved even more. Or also prevented from accessing your own bank account and food if not complying with the controllers. And how the 5G has been weaponized and can be used to target groups or individuals to disable their body functions or even kill them. Also, we could see how in a relatively short amount of time governments have taken legal measures and public media has focused on spreading mostly negative news that resulted in people's movement becoming restrained and their sources of income diminished, in some cases to zero. So the underlying fear in regards to this point is about the same scenario to be repeated in the future even faster and with even stronger negative consequences for me and others.<br />
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Besides initial ranting and raving I now also going to assist myself with the writing of some self-forgiveness and self-correction statements that I learned at the free online course <a href="https://lite.desteniiprocess.com/">DIP Lite</a> that I also recommend to others:<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that due to the current state of almost all people in the world being connected via the internet and making friendships on social networks with thousands of individuals from all over the planet, we now comprehend how similar and interdependent we are and thus we will not turn against each other ever again. I realize that while there exist technical potentials to increase the speed of self-realization, the actual process of real inner transformation takes many years of diligent work and many are still in the beginning stages of this process. I commit myself when and as my mind is producing thoughts like: “I can now relax and have complete trust in the future of peace, happiness, and abundance.” to stop and breathe. I then rather keep myself open to any kind of event that might happen at any time and rely on my ability that I will always be able to find a solution to any challenge that I face in my life.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define someone controlling me as something bad and unacceptable due to my perception that I am free, that I need to stay free, and that anything that will limit my freedom has to be opposed with maximum force. I realize that each of us is already living within many physical, mental and spiritual limitations and that sense or state of freedom is relative and can be practically lived only with consideration of the outflow consequences of acts of every single individual in existence since we all share one existence and every action has its consequence. I commit myself when and as my mind is producing thoughts like: “Every restriction enforced by others onto me is wrong and I will fight it and protect my current freedom!“ to stop and breathe. I then rather take time to see why the certain new limitation has been established, if it is for the long-term benefit of most living beings and to see how many freedoms I still have that allow me to move, create, express and to provide for my basic needs of survival.</blockquote>
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to live the character of a victim due to all the physical, mental and spiritual limitations that I currently experience and that since I am not able to be aware of all the existence and control every detail of it I demand to be taken care of by someone who has more control since I am entitled to be so. I realize that while I am experiencing certain limitations I also have many options to overcome them and expand myself which would be a much better use of time and my potentials than not moving and staying in a state of self-pity. I commit myself when and as my mind is producing thoughts like: “You are so small, weak and insignificant so you have the right to be taken care of.” to stop and breathe. I then rather write down all my weaknesses and the options for becoming stronger in those areas and move effectively every single moment in order to become more able and respond to everything that I am facing in my life.</blockquote>
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In regards to this blog post, I also suggest listening to these supportive audios from the <a href="https://eqafe.com/">Eqafe</a> website where Every Question is Answered for Everyone:<br />
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<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-the-unpredictability-of-life">The Unpredictability of Life</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/atlanteans-who-s-responsible-for-the-enslavement-of-mankind-part-32">Who's Responsible for the Enslavement of Mankind</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/reptilians-how-i-justified-taking-control-of-existence-part-84">How I Justified taking Control of Existence</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/reptilians-justifying-control-on-the-premise-of-unity-part-88">Justifying Control on the Premise of Unity</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/when-the-creators-lost-control-reptilians-part-417">When the Creators Lost Control</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-my-life-as-a-bossy-perfectionistic-control-freak">My Life as a Bossy Perfectionistic Control-Freak</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/2013-the-future-of-consciousness-unpredictability-of-consciousness-part-1-part-11">Unpredictability of Consciousness</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/money-consuming-our-minds-the-soul-of-money">Money Consuming our Minds</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/master-of-war-life-review">Master of War</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/everything-must-be-just-so-life-review">Everything Must Be Just So</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/what-is-inner-control-quantum-mind-self-awareness">What Is Inner Control</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/veils-of-the-mind-freedom-of-expression-atlanteans-part-358">Freedom of Expression</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/what-does-it-mean-to-redefine-freedom-quantum-mind-self-awareness">What Does it Mean to Redefine Freedom</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/practicality-within-redefining-freedom-quantum-mind-self-awareness">Practicality within Redefining Freedom</a>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-56522887325833575452020-04-30T14:16:00.000+02:002020-04-30T14:16:08.050+02:00Day 191: I can no longer count on my father helping meThe new measures that I implemented in recent weeks, as described in my previous blog post, assisted me in calming down my heart area. Since I stopped spending many hours online following coronavirus related to mainstream and alternative news and long videos about all the possible background happenings, my mental state became sufficiently stable. I now have a routine of checking emails and social media messages only twice per day and I read national media news articles once per day, just to be properly informed about the economic and social changes in our country. I do daily planning of my activities and then I execute them one after another without any deviation. That assisted me in becoming very motivated to wake up in the morning, knowing that I have enough work for more than the whole day. And I get satisfaction from ticking off the tasks that I completed and reviewing the list of all completed daily achievements before I go to sleep. However, I noticed also one relapse that I see connected to a fear point due to some other new situation.<br />
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That new situation is the realization that my father is currently not able to assist me financially wise. In the last several years, I have been with approximately constant quantity doing some graphic design and administrative work every single month. And usually, he has been paying me for my executed work pretty regularly every single month. In February 2020 I worked especially a lot for him and I have been looking forward to the earned money. However, that is also the months when our government started to implement the lockdown and his clients did not pay him for the services that he charged. Consequently the following month he was not able to pay me. However, I then also assisted him by preparing the application for the extended financial limit on his bank account. I assumed that he will also pay for what he owns me when the bank will grant him the limit. So I waited and waited and then I called him to check the state of the application. I was quite shocked to hear from him that the bank approved the limit however he already spent all the money on his personal needs like extending the registration of the car and similar.<br />
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My father liked to play the character of a savior and has effectively assisted me a couple of times when I was in financial troubles. He is very ingenious and innovative however it looks that the current situation was also too much for him to handle since it is a massive global event that changed the situation in basically all the people on this planet. I often considered how I am relying on him saving me every time I am in trouble and how I also still was playing the polarity character of a victim just to keep some relationship with him as my father. And I often wished for some event to happen so that I could have a good reason to break this attachment to him and become more self-reliant. And now it seems that this global shutdown is exactly what I wished for and I actually am now very focused on developing my own Life Coaching business services that should generate sufficient source of income for me in order not to have to rely on my father anymore.<br />
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So I had been pushing my business point forward however I do not find it so easy. The most challenging point for me currently is getting clients. I have been studying any ways of how to get them and have invested many days of researching and testing methods and apps for booking and customer relationship management. I have thousand of contact in my address book, thousand of Facebook friends, and thousands of LinkedIn connections that I am able to use to get for marketing. The challenge is how to merge all the contacts to have a complete overview of all my previous communication with any of my contacts and how to systematically follow-up with each of them without anyone falling out of the sales funnel and to avoid any embarrassment due to forgetting any of my past communication with any of them. So far I could not find and CRM that is able to amalgamate all these sources of information and it seems that I will have to develop some kind of CRM system on my own. And then there are all sorts of decisions I have to make like assessing who would be most prospective contacts and to sort them for the purpose of sequential drill-down.<br />
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But the most disturbing thing for me currently is that I have not been able to pay for my rent for the past two months. The rent is being collected in cash by the son of the landlord that also lives in my apartment building. I am meeting him several times per month since he often works in his shed fixing his bikes and experimenting with housing construction using natural materials. Last month when I was not able to pay for the rent the son of the landlord expressed quite a lot of anger about being late with the rent because his father also urgently needed money. I felt very uncomfortable because of that and went into fear. I asked for government support in regards to the rent and I was approved however only for one month and I expect to get the money only the next month. So when the son of the landlord called me if he can visit me to collect the rent for this month I again went in fear about him becoming angry again. Luckily he comprehended the situation and he also showed no signs of resentment while I have been meeting him at the backyard where he has been doing extensive cleaning of the clutter from the attic.<br />
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The relapse that is probably connected with all this additional fear of survival manifested as problems with skin cracks between my toes, especially on my right foot. It seems that the circulation and energy flow through my legs again decreased to an insufficient level. I took care to walk a lot barefoot through each day and I even started to do barefoot hiking to the nearby mountain each weekend however it looks like that was not enough. So I decided for additional support in the form of toe socks which I already wore in the past. I ordered a dozen of such cheap socks from China and a couple of more expensive socks from local online stores that would get me through until the overseas shipment arrives. It is not a permanent solution however toe socks effectively prevent shin of the toes to press on each other the moisture between toes to accumulate there. I figured out that my week leg circulation is mostly genetic due to inherited fear patterns from my father. And my job has been mostly related to working with a desktop computer in a sitting position on a chair or with a laptop computer in a lotus sitting position on my bed with my legs crossed. So I do generally do a lot of mental intellectual work where my legs are still and I can not move them a lot. However, I have a plan for my Life Coaching services to be executed also in a standing position or while I walk around my office or even at the nearby path along the bank of Drava river.<br />
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I just heard today that the lockdown is slowly being lifter in our country. From today we are able to freely travel to other municipalities without going through the checkpoints with a special permit on their borders and also libraries and schools will start to open gradually with the beginning of the next week. Hopefully, also other businesses will start to be opened again and the financial transfers will get back to normal soon. I heard some predictions that the global economic situation will become even worse due to plans to completely collapse the current fiat financial system in order to then implement a completely new one that will be much better for all being on this planet. So let's see what will actually happen.<br />
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And here are some related suggested supportive audios from the <a href="https://eqafe.com/">Eqafe</a> webstore with basically Every Question Answered For Everyone:<br />
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<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/why-fear-feels-different-to-different-people">Why Fear Feels Different to Different People</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/money-fears-the-soul-of-money">Money Fears</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/why-we-create-fear-instead-of-solutions-life-review">Why we create Fear instead of Solutions</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-design-of-fear-of-loss">The Design of Fear of Loss</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/in-fear-of-the-future-life-review">In Fear of the Future</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/adaptation-and-survival-the-consciousness-of-the-crocodiles-alligators">Adaptation and Survival</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/internal-external-process-reptilians-part-337">Internal & External Process</a><br />
Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-88001433976718335682020-04-15T11:54:00.002+02:002020-04-15T11:54:47.441+02:00Day 190: Trying to be prepared for what could happen in the futureIn the last couple of days, I noticed how I have become increasingly anxious. This has been reflecting in the form of frequent heath arrhythmia and stronger tremors in the area around my heart. I had difficulties with relaxing enough to fall asleep in the evening and even though the day I occasionally had pressing episodes where my breathing became more difficult. Yesterday while I was sitting in the backyard garden and had a vegetable salat in the sun I felt like my heart was slowly giving up and I got scared about dying soon. I called a doctor on the phone and based on my answers to her questions she concluded that my heart is just fine and what I am experiencing is mind-related. Then I also borrowed a blood pressure measuring device from one of my neighbors. The results showed that my blood pressure and pulse are normal. That assisted to calm myself down pretty much, however, I realized that I need to take additional measures to protect myself from too much stress.<br /><br />
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During the coronavirus lockdown, I took a lot of care to handle the situation in a calm and peaceful way, paying attention to not overwhelm myself. I did physical exercises in the morning, took regular 1-hour daily walks, stocked myself with food and continued to work from my home. When I noticed the anomalies in regards to my heart I concluded that daily routine was not enough to ground me sufficiently so I went for a longer and more strenuous hike. I noticed that it assisted me a lot so I repeated it a week later and I decided to do it also on each of the following weekends. Additional measures were cutting down the time spent on social media, removing myself from online dating websites and focusing on my personal needs. I restarted to use the <a href="https://www.nirvanahq.com/">Nirvana</a> app that is a companion software of the <a href="https://gettingthingsdone.com/">Getting Things Done</a> methodology that I discovered years ago by reading a book about it. While in the previous months I did moderate planning of my activities, I have now with that app collected and organized all the projects, tasks and reoccurring events. It now helps me to avoid procrastination and laziness and it assists me in being much more productive each day so I am now much more satisfied with myself.<br />
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The following are the related statements of self-forgiveness, realizations, and commitments that I learned to apply at the free online self-perfection course <a href="http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/">Desteni I Process Lite</a> and I suggest you to also try it out to assist with directing yourself effectively:<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as the discoverer and sharer of the deepest life secrets. I realize that while digging for and forwarding shocking information made me feel good and useful to others, I lack within that to find a way to monetize it and to provide a stable source of income for my basic needs. I commit myself to when and as I look at my passions to ask myself about the core reasons for doing that and to then look at how I can turn it into a business or or doing it as a hobby while providing myself an additional source of income to at least cover all of my monthly expenses.<br /><br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I can protect myself from all negative influences the most by researching how things in this world work which means spending a lot of time watching all the available documentaries about secret societies, financial and legal system and every interesting fact that I stumble upon. I realize that there are a lot of contradictive theories that are all very concerning and absorbing all this information has created many fears and insecurities within me. Thus I commit myself to only occasionally follow the sources of information that proved so far to be the most reliable and are in a form that takes as little time as possible from me to digest the infromation.</blockquote>
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<br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that possession of a large quantity of information is the best way to protect myself from all the possible harm. I realize that while the expected result would have to be in me becoming more self-confident, the accumulation of information actually made my mind even more restless and every situation that I found myself in triggered a lot of thoughts about all kind of possible reasons why I am experiencing something and made me confused about how to respond to situations that I am facing in real-time. I commit myself instead of creating assumptions based on accumulated knowledge to rather ask people that I am meeting about what is their reason for doing something. And to also ask other people in the actual situations that I find myself in about what is the nature of any manifestation in my physical proximity.<br /><br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to build my stability on the information that I gathered in the past instead of realizing that any information that I possess can become outdated and that it could also be false in the first place. I commit myself to when and as I am facing a situation in my life and my mind is trying to assist me by fetching all kinds of supposedly related information that I integrated in the past or trying to associate the current event with any of my past experiences, to stop and breathe. I then rather face every single situation as something completely new and not even slightly related to anything that I know about or have experienced in the past by doing real-time research based on what I can verify by tangible evidence at this present moment.</blockquote>
And here are some additional suggested educational audios to listen from the <a href="https://eqafe.com/">Eqafe</a> website with Every Question Answered for Everyone:<br />
<br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/hidden-in-secrets-quantum-mind-self-awareness">Hidden in Secrets</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/secrecy-quantum-mind-self-awareness">Secrecy</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/don-t-ask-don-t-tell-quantum-mind-self-awareness">Don't Ask, Don't Tell</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/secret-information-life-review">Secret Information</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/technology-brainwashing-body-influence-the-quantum-mechanics-of-paranormal-events-part-53">Technology Brainwashing & Body Influence</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/self-image-and-fear-of-others">Self-Image and Fear of Others</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/life-review-living-fear">Living Fear</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/mental-hoarder-life-review">Mental Hoarder</a>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-67508477539382369832020-03-31T21:53:00.002+02:002020-04-15T10:13:43.064+02:00Day 189: How the new Coronavirus and Covid-19 influenced meWe are in the 2nd week of the new Coronavirus shutdown in Slovenia where we are not permitted to travel outside the municipality where we live, with some exceptions. The new government directive is that we must stay at home and go out only for shopping for groceries, occasional walks and to go to work if you are the lucky employee where the business has not been shut down. Now face masks are mandatory on all closed public spaces like stores for example. Public media present the picture of the situation where the hospitals are full of COVID-19 patients while those who have actually visited the hospital say that they are almost completely empty. I have noticed how I emotionally reacted in front of some people in this situation so I am going to do a few self-corrections.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react with anger when the security guard offered me to disinfect my palms in at the entrance of the store where I wanted to buy some groceries. Within that, I forgive myself for refusing to use the disinfectant with the justification that I do not know what its ingredients are and that it may actually harm me. I realize that the security guard has just been doing his job and that I could explain myself, accept or refuse his offer while remaining emotionally stable. I commit myself to when and as I visit a store and I am confronted with a new situation and my mind is producing thoughts like: “What the fuck is now this? How far will the forcing of things onto me go on? How more strict will the situation become in the future?” to stop and breathe. I decide to constructively analyze the situation, stay stable, ask questions about the reasons for the change, asses possible threats and then decide about my response while considering others as equals.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become annoyed when the grocery shop assistant told me to use the plastic gloves to pick the fruit and then me telling her that I do not believe in what public media is telling us about the danger of viruses. I realize that she was also just doing her job, following instructions of her superiors with thought that this will bring more safety. I commit myself to when and as someone tells me to do something in regards to virus scare and my mind is producing thought like: “I am allowing no one to command me and to tell me what to do!“ to stop and breathe. I then consider also the point of view of those who are telling me things and maybe decide to obey their suggestion since things like wearing gloves can not harm me and is a very small nuisance.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react with the fear when noticing how people have panicked and went on a mass grocery shopping. I realize that I allowed myself to be afraid of food running out and me having to starve while the government explained that they have food reserves that are enough for several months. I commit myself to when and as I observe compulsive buying in the stores and my mind is producing thoughts like: “Look how people are smart and stocking themselves just to be safe so learn from them and do the same1” to stop and breathe. I then rather consider trusting the government and buying for myself only what I need for the next several days since if I would overbuy, I would contribute to the store going out of items for those who currently need them.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to fear that the deep state members will use this fake coronavirus pandemic to enforce compulsory vaccination and that I will be chipped and become a slave where my health will also deteriorate due to vaccination and 5G network. I realize that I am creating such fear due to the projection of a negative future in my mind. I commit myself to when and as I notice the new events happening in this world and my mind is producing thoughts like: “Look at all the catastrophes that the deep state will certainly use for their depopulation agenda!” to stop and breathe. I then consider the possibilities of all kinds of scenarios, but pay attention to not overthink and rather remain calm and respond only to actual threats that manifest themselves in my close proximity that I am actually able to protect myself from in a practical way.</blockquote>
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Here are some suggested related audios to listen:<br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-evolution-of-viruses-reptilians-part-243">The Evolution of Viruses (Part 1)</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-evolution-of-viruses-part-2-reptilians-part-244">The Evolution of Viruses (Part 2)</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/fighting-off-viruses-reptilians-part-245">Fighting off Viruses</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-virus-and-the-body-reptilians-part-246">The Virus and the Body</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/mind-virus-versus-body-reptilians-part-247">Mind + Virus Versus Body</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-evolution-of-the-common-cold-2013-future-of-consciousness-part-44">The Evolution of the Common Cold</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/flu-fear-the-future-the-future-of-consciousness-part-79">Flu, Fear & the Future</a>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4658087174373204867.post-91779625253228608062020-03-04T15:10:00.001+01:002020-03-04T15:10:45.321+01:00Day 188: A balance between the inner and outerThis is a reflection on my current experience of myself in relation to recent events in my personal life and news about global events. The biggest points are engagement in online dating, dental issues, legal threats, developing my new business services, visiting the gym, inner transformation process, Coronavirus, U.S. elections, new Slovenian government, and the global money system.<br /><br />
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It has been about two weeks since I reengaged in an active online dating. I updated my existing profiles at some of the dating websites and created new profiles at most promising dating sites and apps. It has been a massive investment of my time and also some money to present myself in the best way possible to single women, to browse their profiles and like the ones that I found to be most compatible with me. With some that responded positively, I engaged in extensive online conversations, voice chats and in some cases even traveling and meeting them live. The process of weeding out all the fake scamming and phishing profiles has been quite frustrating and the percentage of those who actually responded was very low. In the chats with those that responded I learned many new things and had to make decisions in regards to the level of compatibility and predictions how my life in a long-term relationship with them would influence me personally and business-wise. And mostly I have been wondering about my motivation and expectations about wanting to be in a relationship in the first place or do I actually need to be in a relationship to achieve the effects that I expect from being in a relationship with someone else. For example how much would someone else contribute to me becoming more motivated in doing something and suggesting to me what to do in order to compensate my indecisiveness as a typical Libra? And to what level is dating possibly for the most part just a distraction from empowering myself on my own and becoming able to function without the need of being directed and approved by someone outside of myself?<br />
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The tooth pain and a visit to the dentist made me think about my current dental state, the future of losing even more teeth by getting older and the general role of the teeth for practical processing of the food and the social acceptance while smiling and thus displaying own teeth to others. For example, even though dating the feedback of the girls showed how much value they give to an outer presentation, including how the teeth look. And that also created concern about the relationship dynamic if the situation of my teeth would worsen a lot. Then I wondered about the national medical insurance, how our dental system works and the long waiting periods or high costs of dental appointments if deciding to pay it all by myself and the option to travel to Croatia where they have better dental equipment and much lower prices. I even considered if I could apply any of the other dental options that I heard about like stell cell implants for the extracted teeth to regrow or to initiate the process of growing the complete new set of teeth like some were able to achieve when transitioned to breatharianism. Or how the new plasma science that the <a href="https://www.keshefoundation.org/">Keshe Foundation</a> has been developing has a similar potential of directly providing the necessary energy that we extract by eating food and thus we would not any longer have the need to use the teeth for food crushing and consequently they would stay in perfect condition.<br />
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Some level of anxiety that I experienced in the past couple of years was also due to legal threats and discovering how the global system of money, religion, law, and enforcement works. Like how the birth certificates are being used to create fictions, value for the banking system, a life of bondage by the assumption of consent and expanding the monarchistic dictatorship of the Roman Catholic Church all over the globe by creating wars and killing millions of people. And how each one of us has the power of claiming own life by taking similar procedure that has been almost literally exposed in the <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jupiter_Ascending">Jupiter Ascending</a> moving and transitioning from using national languages that have been deliberately corrupted into babble into using the <a href="http://dwmlc.com/">Correct-Sentance-Structure-Communication-Parse-Syntax-Grammar-Performance</a>. I was glad to see that withing the current U.S. elections presidential candidate Andrew Yang talked so much about the importance of transitioning from the current system of consumerism, perpetual growth, and debt into making the quality of life as the primary objective by providing Unconditional Basic Income in form of a Freedom Dividend and finally enjoying the fruits of all kind of automation, robots and artificial intelligence that we have developed. Even the leader of the new Slovenian government has expressed plans to move in this direction and supposedly the global news obsession about the New Human Coronavirus, fake or not, could be the additional motivation or just a public distraction in order for the new global financial system to be implemented that would finally free the humanity.<br />
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With the development of computers and the internet, we are increasingly becoming connected and able to share information with anyone all over the globe in a matter of milliseconds. However, digitalization also presents the challenge of creating illusions and fake news so one needs to be very cautious about everything that is online. It is all a reflection of our own mind where we equally create parallel virtual worlds in our imagination where we hide and pretend and think that our actions there has no consequence. That can be addictive and if we apply the same principle also in this physical world that we all share, the result is the destruction of our life sources that has become more and more evident. Since what we can see out there is merely a reflection of what is within us, it is best for all to walk the path towards manifesting a <a href="https://eqafe.com/p/virus-free-mind">Virus Free Mind</a>. So while we can all satisfy our curiosity about what is going on in this world it is best to stay balanced and spend at least equal time walking the process of self-reflection, self-awareness, self-forgiveness, and self-commitments with the support of online courses like the completely free <a href="http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/">DIP Lite</a> course with experienced live buddies. And while we can not change the basic structure of our physical body and all of its characteristics that we inherited, we still can improve it by selecting a diet that would best support our physical body and exercising in order to stay fit the best way possible. Thus I also have improved my eating habits and increased the frequency and visiting the gym in order to make the best of all the potentials that I have within all the limitations that are beyond my power of conscious influence.<br />
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The field in my life that needs more movement has remained my business activities. It is interesting how I become excited about something like becoming a Certified Life Coach and imagining how offering such services would best fit my lifestyle and would support others the most and they observed how things are not moving as fast as I hoped to. There is a question of how actually I am influencing this world by my current activities and if there are actually positive consequences that I am not even aware of. Like is it more effective to be politically active out there, is talking and assisting others face to face personally or in group formation more important, should I blog and vlog more, especially in the English language, or is my inner process of transforming my own mind patterns the most important since it resonates on a subtle level and creates a ripple effect on all levels of existence? Well so far I am moving slowly but steadily in all those areas and I just wish that it will create a synergetic accumulative effect that would result in a better world for all as soon as possible. I definitely feel resistances in the form of physical tiredness and it is not easy to identify what portion of it is simply muscle tiredness from lifting weights at the gym, how much of it is the mental tiredness due to absorbing and processing an incredible amount of information on a daily basis, to what extend my awareness is just becoming more integrated with my physical body that is under influence of planetary gravitational force, how much the two teeth with root canals in my mouth contribute to the feeling of lack of energy, does the electromagnetic fields from all the cell towers, wifi networks, and other possible influences play I significant role in how I currently feel, and what am I able to do to feel more light, energized and productive. Anyway, I simply do my best in every single moment and make sure that I remain emotionally stable as much as possible within the realization that we are all in this together, that we are all one and that if I keep such awareness, I will be just fine no matter what happens.<br /><br />Suggested related supportive educational audios:<br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/balance-quantum-mind-self-awareness">Balance</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/creating-balance-in-change-relationship-success-support">Creating Balance in Change</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/give-receive-the-soul-of-money">The Balance in Support</a><br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-good-times-the-bad-reptilians-part-482">The Good Times & the Bad</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/in-balance-with-your-body-demons-in-the-afterlife-part-69">In Balance with your Body</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/creating-balance-while-changing-yourself-the-crucifixion-of-jesus-part-95">Creating Balance while Changing Yourself</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/the-trinity-of-dependence-independence-and-interdependence">The Trinity of Dependence, Independence and Interdependence</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/over-disciplined-and-overindulging-life-review">Over Disciplined and Overindulging</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/me-time-and-we-time-relationship-success-support">Me Time and We Time</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/when-you-change-when-you-don-t-reptilians-part-294">When You Change & When You Don't</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/split-into-two-worlds-the-future-of-consciousness-part-61">Split into Two Worlds</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/insecurity-insecurity-confidence-polarity-atlanteans-part-150">Insecurity-Confidence Polarity</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/my-intelligence-is-my-only-friend-life-review">My Intelligence is my Only Friend</a><br /><a href="https://eqafe.com/p/mind-made-choices-life-review">Mind-Made Choices</a>Valentin Rozman ENhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17883435370803104725noreply@blogger.com0