Day 132: Demolition of the invisible wall

Lately I have been bumping into invisible wall. I am not referring to a vertical structure that prevents me from accessing a specific location, but a mental wall, composed of a thoughts and emotions that prevents me from performing specific tasks that are needed in order to achieve certain business goals. These tasks are part of a direct sales activities and are such as generating leads, making phone calls, scheduling meetings, executing presentations, making sales, asking for referrals and following up. All these are simple physical activities that do not require big muscles, however they are strongly related to mental activities. Thus my challenge is to penetrate the invisible wall in my mind.

I have been engaging in many different sales activities in the past and I have been one of the most successful salesman, earning high commissions. So what has changed, what is now the difference? Well firstly the media is full of information about financial crisis. There are constantly reports about how government is facing a money deficit, how cuts and savings are necessary, how even banks do not have enough money, so constantly the media programming about how there is not enough money for even the basic needs of the people, let alone to be able to afford more valuable product like I am currently selling. Consequently my mind if producing thoughts that there is no point of even trying to make any sales since no one will buy as there is not enough money.

Secondly as one of the most prominent patterns is my accepted and allowed character that I play within relationship with my father. He wanted for others to consider him as a loving father that takes care for the basic needs of the family and protects his children from all the evil of this world. Thus me and my brother were not allowed to go out in the evenings and at weekends in order not to make friends with peers that possess bad habits and consequently start indulging in drugs and alcohol. And then he also started with family business where I have been executing work task on the computer as I have been instructed by him. So my life survival tactics have been developed in form of a person who is quiet, waits for instructions of others and then the money comes automatically and mysteriously as the reward for doing what I was told to.

The third thing is that I am selling a new product with high value that requires a lot of sales steps and managing a lot of information. Previously I did a small orders for just few clients and when there would be no orders, I would take break for several hours or even several days. I started to enjoy such free time where no one demanded nothing from me. Now I am developing a much larger business with network of hundred of salesman and many thousand clients that will need to be managed basically for all my life. This requires a robust information management system and a constant overview and situational awareness of all the business points in any time in order for the business to develop properly. So comparing to my previous life style, the new business venture looks like a suicide mission.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as character of obedient and humble person that waits for the orders from my father and immediately executes any given task and then stops moving after the task is completed. I realize that while I am still doing some tasks for my father and he is still consequently assisting me financially, such relationship is not supportive for my life and prevents me from acting as independent person and manifesting my own projects. I commit myself to live my own life as my father does not exist anymore and as he does not support me financially anymore and to generate my own sources of income by building my own business.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe the media news about the financial crisis and lack of money. I realize that media is focused on the shocking negative perspectives of society in order to generate attention and also to infuse fear into the public since the media owners have their own agenda that is not for the benefit of all. I commit myself to when engaging in sales activities to proceed with sales steps without any imagination about how much money the person that I am contacting currently possesses. My mind is not able to know the financial situation of any person before I actually ask them and receive a reply.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that by managing a large organization one will have less free time to relax and do fun things. I realize that any owner of a business is able to hire professional managers that can run the organization effectively and thus creating a lot of free time for the owners. I commit myself to when and as my mind would enter a state of overwhelmingness to breathe, slow down, assist myself with writing and move forward with digestible steps. There will always be ways to solve any problem if one moves with the speed of the physical breath by breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not to use the tool of speaking and writing whenever I bump into the invisible wall of my mind. I realize that the mind will constantly create new walls in order to prevent me from moving forward and that they will not disappear on their own in time, but will exist and persist until I face them meticulously and deconstruct them brick by brick, thought by thought until the mind runs out of bricks and then only will I be free to move anywhere without any limitations.

Day 37: Resistance to the new job finally overcamed

Today in the morning I had a meeting with a new interesting person who is also very in self-research and improvement. Two hours of conversation went by very quickly and I was to face again the next step of my sales activities. I was to restructure the presentation narrative and then also realign the presentation flip-chart graphics which I also did. I took me a lot of decision making how to design all the material for the best impact. In the afternoon when I was to go out and arrange in-house visits, the storm clouds accumulated and rain with thunder stoke from the skies.

At the same time as the storm raged, my mind lost its stability. A slight fear and dizziness appeared in my head and was disappointed due to estimation that I will not be able to execute the visits that I planned. I lied down on the bed and started to think about how long will it take me to even start the new job properly and when I would actually make the first sale. The whole process is takin so long, too long. I started to imagine how I will give myself another day to prepare myself even better for the presentation. I said to myself that tomorrow would be the day. However it turned out different.

After on hour of resting in the bed, my head became stable and the rain stopped. I still had about two or three hours left before in would become too late for the home visits. So I sad to myself that it would be the best to make some visits today and thus brake the ice even if I would achieve best results. Most important is to move forward and to gain as much practice as possible. So I dressed up, packed all the presentation and went on the road.

I targeted a small new neighborhood that I knew from before when I was searching for my own apartment in the town a year ago. I found the blocks very nice and expected a lot of young families to live there which is my target population. I started to ring the bells and made the talks. Many of them, about 70% were not even at home which is a usual percentage. I visited two blocks and then decided to stop for today. I did not manage to do any presentation, however I handed out couple of business cards and couple of people were willing to talk to me if I visit them at some other time which is also cool.

In the evening I had a chat with my mentor who evaluated my approach and corrected me for the better effect in the future. I realized how what I said created resistance in other people and what is best to be said in order to collect as much orders as possible. The main point in pre-presentation talks is not to give to much information, but just a little in order to create curiosity. I also met a girl who I found very attractive and now I am thinking if I should do anything to check if she is available and if I should try to  make a connection or if I should focus on business for now.

Anyway, I made progress and I am satisfied with my achievement. I will now push myself every day a step forward until I became excellent and very successful in sales. It is not just about money, what is cool about direct sales is that one develops communication skills and overcomes many fears and resistances that prevent oneself to fully express itself. Physically moving and making live conversation with others is an effective tool for self-realization. Thus I also suggest others to engage in sales activities and experience all the beneficial effects of direct marketing.