Day 119: Moving again

It has not been even five months yet since I moved to current small studio apartment and I have made a decision to move again. It was relatively nice to live here in the neighborhood of medium to high class people on the suburb of capital city Ljubljana with nature and hills nearby. However some points started to accumulate that resulted in decision to place myself in a new environment again.

The apartment was quite practical due to being very narrow and long, allowing me to have the business office in front and kitchen way back which was very nice for my business needs. However shortly after I moved in I noticed that roof was leaking, the internet connection was slow, the lighting was poor, especially in the kitchen and bathroom, and now I also got the information that the ceiling has poor thermal isolation and that in the cold winter it is freezing inside in spite of heating being turned on fully.

Then also the landlord who is older woman lives just next door, meaning that I need to pass right her doors and porch in order to enter my apartment which is not very convenient. Firstly I expected that I will be in very good relationship with the landlord since she also studied spiritual books very intensely, however in time it turned out that she is not really very open-minded but part of a certain international spiritual group with such philosophy that prevents her to act grounded and consider this physical reality as something that has to be considered as primary point.

And the third reason why I am to move out is that I initially thought that living in the capital city will enable my business and non-profit projects to manifest faster, however it turned out that in the big cities, people are generally very nervous, full of fear, pressured with high rent prices and lack of time so it is not ideal place where my plans could be achieved effectively. I got information recently that it is generally best for any sales, especially if they are school and education related, to work outside big cities, especially in the northeast part of our country.

So while being born and living most of my life in northwest part of Slovenia and for the past four years living in the center of the country, I plan now to experience also life in the northeast region. I see this as kind of adventure and opportunity to gather more life experiences by meeting new people there. Also a lot of good friends live now in the surrounding of my future planned place of permanent residence so there will be many benefits.

Day 51: Moving out to new apartment

Yesterday I was about to sign a renting contract with owner of apartment and then he called me that he would not be able to giva his apartment for rent since he is not yet correctly recorded in the land register. So today I had to check again the rest of online real estate ads and make some additional calls. Some apartments were not available anymore, some people did not answer the call, some were too much outside the desired area, some were available only for students and some only for females, some had no photos attached, but after couple of hours of phone calles I finally found one that fits the price range, the location and the quality of interior.

I called the landlord and it was a polite older woman who answered. I asked if it is possible to look at the apartment in one hour and she confirmed. In about 20 minutes I arrived and it was a nice neighborhood of quite new houses. She accepted me nicely and showed me the interior. It was very nice, with new furniture, cool kitchen and cute bathroom. We immediately connected and after a couple of minutes of chat we were like old friends. Very different from my current landlord who does not care what I do as long as she gets the money. This is also why I want to move out since I do not want to give money to the person who does not respect me and what I do.

Now I have to prepare the renting agreement and tomorrow morning I expect to have it signed and then I will be fully focused on packing my staff and transporting it to the new location. Since I am moving to much smaller apartment with furniture already placed, I will be selling or giving out a lot of my current furniture. Some of my friends has been assisting me yesterday and today in the photo shoot of the biggest furniture peaces and I will prepare the online ads for them soon. I will have to think all the details about what things to keep and what not. This will be a cool cleaning project where I will get rid of a lot of stuff that I have stopped using due to change in my lifestyle and sort of business.

What I found strange is a great resistance towards activities of preparing the ads and packing things. The day after tomorrow a new tenant will come to look at my current apartment and I don't know if they would want to buy any of the furniture that I have. Also I don't know if I should keep some of the products that I was selling before or if I should sell them as soon as possible. Tomorrow my ex-girlfriend will come for a visit in order to assist me with packing. Moving to the new place is certainly a big step in everyone's life and this will be the sixth move in my life. However I will be having just one third of my current monthly costs and this will allow me to create more profit in order to invest in the development in my business. After the new projects will be fully running, then moving to bigger apartment or business office will be in play again.

Day 45: Motivation research Day two

A fey years ago I experienced like things were moving fast and smoothly. However in last two years I feel like it takes much more time for projects to succeed. Like someone is pushing brakes on the system. People do not respond easily, there is a lot of mistrust, fear, anger, desperation. Or is it just me experiencing the reality this way and thus creating my experiences based on my own image? 

I would like to find out what is the true reality, however this is hard. There is so much false information, lies and deceptions everywhere. Corporations and governments control the media and information flow, they use politics and weapons to enforce law that best suits their self-interest. And if one is to stop all this, a high capacity of information processing is necessary, high self-discipline and awareness, communication skills, managements and organization knowledge, collaboration with other individuals and groups and it looks very challenging. Also money is needed. A lot of money. Money moves things and without money nothing moves. So how to get money?

Incomes and outcomes. Currently I have a lot of fix monthly bills our outcomes. I have to generate a lot of income to create profit. And only the profit is the money that I can then use to move things. However incomes in last few months were basically nothing. So I face a decision. I am not sure how soon and how much income I would be able to generate. Moving to smaller and cheaper apartment seems to be a smart move. Maybe this would also motivate me more. Now in big nice apartment I fell safe and relaxed. Too relaxed. Shall I motivate myself by deliberately lowering my living standars? Is that what I need? An experience that puts me in the position where I do not want to be in order to motivate myself sufficiently to become more active and focused on creating more income and thus also reducing my monthly outcomes? Perhaps.

They say one must squat low in order to jump high. It looks like I do not appreciate enough what I currently have. And I have trouble motivating myself. I am to lazy. It like the story where someone visited a friend and his dog was laying on the porch. While talking to friend, the guy would notice that the dog would grouch from time to time. He asked the friend what with the dog and the friend explained that the dog is laying on a nail. When he asked him why the dog does not move, friend relied that it does not hurt him enough. Maybe I am that dog. Maybe it does not hurt me enough to move. So how much pain and suffering do I need to change, to take action. And why can I not move without pain? This must change.

Day 24: I decided to brake up with my girlfriend

In the previous post of this blog I wrote how the visit of my good friend opened up my eyes and assisted me in becoming aware how detrimental a relationship is where your partner is constantly telling you that it can not be done, that you will not succeed, that money is root of all evil and a lot of similar limiting and unsupportive claims. One can try consciously telling itself that these statements are not true, however when hearing them every single day for several times, they slip to the subconscious and unconscious mind and start to sabotage you without being aware of.

Yesterday I decided to have a talk with my girlfriend and told her that I suggest to part. She agreed and told me that she also expected me to come to this decision sooner or later since she also was not very committed to our relationships and desired a different lifestyle. I am planning to prepare myself for political an leadership activities and I need a capable and supportive partner who does want the same. However my girlfriend did not want even to dress different, but was always in casual new age clothes and wanted to live without any big responsibilities in the nature and do some agriculture or similar activities.

Our relationship was beneficial for both of us, we learned and realized a lot. I gain experience about how is to be fully physically loved and accepted and I saved here from previous violent relationship and showed her how man can communicate and act peacefully. However now is time to move one. I need a more supportive environment, friends who build me up, who see the solutions instead of problems, who realize that each one of us has power to achieve incredible things and that with dedication and focus we can relatively quickly turn this world into what is best for all.

So today my girlfriend is moving out to her parents place and will focus on finishing the exams for her high school of cosmetics before she graduates in one or two months. My business will thus also stop offering her massage services and I will from now on focus on counseling, educational and informational products that support life. I plan to develop my connections with groups of successful and responsible people that I have been involved in and use my time and abilities to create as big social impact as possible.

I see what are my next challenges and there are a lot of mountains to climb yet. I am looking forward to transform myself to more open, collaborative and successful person, meet new people, expand my perspective and activate unlimited potentials that await me. There are people out there with mentality that speed up creative process to unimaginable levels and there are possibilities that no one would ever dream of.