I have been observing my behavior patterns when I interact with other people. My observation intensity increased lately due to listening of some audio material that explain how successful people take full responsibility for their lives and how they let themselves to be taught by other successful people in order to change their behavior and make better use of their available time. One of the most prominent characteristics of successful people is to have genuine love or interest for other people, to care for them, and thus build yourself a very attractive charisma. Consequently your open and sincere attitude is accumulated also in many business opportunities that bring a lot of money.
Listening to these material challenges my believe that you can earn a lot of money only if you abuse other people and deliberately manipulate with them to buy what you are selling. I see that I inherited those believes from my parents, especially from my father, who was very critical and cynical towards politicians and rich people, defining them as those who exploit others and steal in very deceptive ways. My father holds a believe that you can earn decent money only if you work hard. He in very innovative in ways how to make money to support himself, but he is not successful in building a team of people that would make even more money. He is full of anger and blame and envy and very short tempered.
In the audio material that I listen, I learn that difference between very successful and less successful people is in taking full responsibility for your life. Successful people never blame others for anything that happens in their lives. They never define anything as bad, but see everything as challenge and opportunity to learn and to make themselves a better person. You always get money from other people, so in order for others to give you money, you need to provide them with something that they want, with something that will improve their lives. Others can sense if you are sincere or if you are just trying to take advantage of them. So being totally honest and truly caring is the key to lasting and increasing success.
When I observe myself and my interaction with other people, I see that I am very uncomfortable with making connections and starting conversations. I need some event to happen in order to break the ice. I need to see some common point of interest before I start sharing myself with others. I need to firstly see the potential of engaging in conversation so that I will get something in return or so that people that I speak with will appreciate what I have to say. Thus I firstly observe others and estimate their level of understanding and compatibility with me, before I consider them worth of contacting.
This point became even more prominent since I started to live with my girlfriend who has much more easy going character and is able to connect with anyone anytime without any judgement or fear. When she finds something or something attractive, she becomes like a child, approaches the subject with funny innocent gestures and voice, extends her arms and touches the subject sweet and gently. One advantage of hers is that she is a woman and they are already by nature more opened and easy to connect between each other, but even among females she is much more childish than others. However she lacks ability of sharing useful supportive content and mostly engages only in small talk.
The harders part of conversation with someone you don't know is starting conversation. One way of how to connect with others is to observe them and pick something that you really like about them. When you approach them you can say: "I really like your tie!" or something. This is cool ice-breaker and it opens subject for discussion. Everyone needs to be accepted and recognized and feel welcome. There is so much criticism in this world, and it is very easy to point fingers, blame, judge and be picky, and it is hard to say something nice about others. It is even harder to give a sincere compliment, without being dishonest and manipulative.
For me it is hard to open myself due to self-judgement, of being dependent on other people's opinion, so I am careful not to make myself a fool or communicate with those who I perceive that will be not interested in what I want to share. I act from a kind of self-protective position where I am more like observer than active participant. I have not yet become person who direct himself towards what is best for all and thus feels no shame or regret. Thus I am continuing with realizing that self-honesty is the key element for permanent succes in life. And it is also about standing for what is best for all no matter what. They say: "The higher the level, the higher the devil", so the one who stands up for life also need to be prepared to face great challenges that come along with this state of the mind.
Many, including me, do not want to disturb others, thus I hold myself back and live rather more quiet and isolated life than put myself in center of attention. I fear that if I would become more opened, others would want my attention, they would want to socialize with me as much as possible and that would drain my energy. I learned that some want to listen and follow others due to not wanting to take self-responsibility for their lives. So they follow easy going people just for entertainment, to distract their attention from the problems in their lives. And this is not what I want to do. I want everybody to take self-responsibility and face everything that they created in their lives. From my point of view, there is enough wisdom in this world that one can easily change their behavior patterns only if decides to stop.
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- I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself the believe that rich people are all abusers instead of realizing that one can become rich by not caring about others, but there are also a lot of millionaires that care for others very much, and use honesty and integrity as the directive principle of their business.
- I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself that one can earn decent money only by hard work with own bare hands, instead of realizing that in this way you can earn only limited amount of money, thus you can earn much more if you sell products that are required by a large amount of people, or create a business that provide services for many people.
- I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself the fear of what will others think of me, instead of realizing that this fear is based in self-judgement and what others think about me is their own creation and projection, thus it is best for me to direct myself in every breath in total self-honesty and self-trust towards what is best for all.
- I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to be afraid that I will run out of energy if I engage in long conversation with many people, instead of realizing that feeling of being drained always originates from the mind if someone communicates based on knowledge and information and not using common sense, and directive principle of oneness and equality and what is best for all.
- I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself the believe that it is best for not to disturb anybody an live peaceful life, instead of realizing that I am responsible for everything that exists in this world, thus by not acting and directing others to become self-honest and live here as responsible participants, I allow evil to continue in this world.
- I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to communicate from the point of hurry, blame, anger and resentment when I see some situation that needs to be aligned with the principle of what is best for all, instead of becoming one and equal with all participants, slow down, be here, and take all the necessary time to give proper information and direct event in order for sufficient realisation is established for the transformation of behavior patterns.
- When I meet other people, I become and and equal with them, immediately connect and start conversation with ease and then support others from starting point of self-honesty, equality and what is best for all.
- When I speak, I am breathe effectively, stay here, slow myself down, and speak from common sense, from my own personal realisation and thus stay stable and clear all the time, regardless of how long I speak.
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