Day 123: First step of moving to Maribor

Days 121 to 122 are in my Slovenian blog

Yesterday I drove with fully packed car to Maribor city. I have transported there the first quantity of my stuff to the temporary location in the center of the city near Lent region. I have checked out the location of my potential new apartment in the two-story old city house near a two-way road. The son of the owner of the house is living in one of the top apartments and is renovating all the apartments on father's behalf and converting them into rooms for the students. In the top as in the bottom floor there are three to four rooms with joint kitchen and bathroom.

In the first floor of the house there are already people living and one of them is a friend who I met couple of years ago and is deeply involved in spirituality. She moved there from the costal region to study at the Faculty of education. We had and interesting chat after I moved all my stuff from the car to one of the bottom rooms. I also met some of her visiting friends who is working in field of ecology and there was also a nice asian girl who decided to live in the city with her young child and a dog.

So while the top floor of the house has already been completely renovated and filled with people, the bottom floor yet needs a couple of days for the finishing touches. The landlord allowed me to store my stuff in one of the rooms and maybe I will decide to stay there for a while. It all depends how I will find living there appropriate. At this time the heating is off, the kitchen is not installed, light bulbs and shower are missing and the door frames are not completed.

What also bothers me there is that my potential room is near the road so there is some noise from the cars driving nearby. Also the parking is not very comfortable. Then I will have to see if there will be any other disturbing elements that will be unacceptable for me. So I am a bit nervous and anxious about all this movement to the new place and I feel a block in my belly. I am entering a new, unknown territory and obviously every moving of permanent residence is quite a big change.

Yesterday I also met another friend who has a master's degree in education, is author of three books and an interesting card sets that assist people in realizing and overcoming emotional limitations. We had quite a long talk, I estimate it was at least three hours and we shared a lot of interesting information. She is a very fast and extensive speaker, energetic person, very opened, kind and with lots of ideas. There is a lot of potential of mutual collaboration there and I am looking forward to it.

Now I will have to wait in Ljubljana for another two days until the rooms in the bottom floors will be ready for living and in that time I will pack the rest of my stuff in the boxes. I plan the next and final trip to Maribor on Sunday and from then on I will become a resident of Maribor city.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted the feeling of fear that I will not be comfortable in my new place after visiting the location where work is in the progress, instead of realizing that when I will move there is couple of days, the work will be already completely finished.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted the feeling of anxiety due to thinking that noise in the new apartment will be too much for me instead of realizing that I could get used to frequent sounds, like I got used to quite loud sound of the refrigerator in my current apartment which I found very disturbing initially.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to be afraid of the nearby very wide river to fill my future apartment with water in case of the floods instead of researching the history of floods in that area and verifying if my location is in fact on endangered locations.

I commit myself to breathe effectively and be full here, in this moment and act in accordance to real physical events and situations.

I commit myself to fully express myself and communicate with people that I am surrounded with and dependent so that they understand my needs and assist me in providing me with a suitable living conditions.

Day 88: Self-forgiveness on perfectionism

Days 86 and 87 are in my Slovenian blog

I was collecting contact information from web pages of entities that I was to contact and I intended to create a Google Maps custom layers with the position indicators of that entities. However for the Google to correctly recognize the address and creates a location marker, the street name has to be full length and completely correct otherwise it will not show up. And what I have found on the web sites of around half of entities, were the shortened or declined street names that I then had to individually reference in the search engine and identify the corresponding full name.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to become angry at the web site content creators that shortened or declined the street names instead of realizing that this is usually done in order to simplify long street descriptions and make them more friendly and not to deliberately make my life painful.

When I stumble upon a shortened or declined street name and if I for the purpose of automated information processing need a full long name, I stay here, breathe effectively and utilize the search engine until I get the required for of information.

A few days ago after a short but heavy rainy storm, a leak appeared in the wooden ceiling of my new apartment and the water drops created a big puddle on the floor.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted to be angry at my landlady who did not inform me about the leaking ceiling instead of realizing that she could believe that the leak has been fixed.

When I notice some damaged part of the apartment that does not perform as I expect, I breathe effectively, stay here and peacefully communicate with the landlady in order to remediate the problem as soon as possible with mutual satisfaction.

I am preparing to sell some products via direct marketing and I am procrastinating with my outdoor activities since I perceive myself not to be ready and skillful enough in executing effective presentation.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted the feeling of fear of rejection and loosing money since I perceive that I am not skillful enough instead of realizing that rejection in this lin of business is around 90% even if you are the most skillful communicator so it is purely a numbers game.

When I go out and make presentation of the product, in case of rejection I remain here, breathe effectively and understand that not every product is appropriate for every person at time of presentation and even if the person likes the product, they could be lacking of money or have different priorities in life. Thus I can always come around at a later stage and reattempt the sale. Many sales require around five attempts until the customer finally says yes and this is the true nature of this business.

Day 19: Expectations breed excitement and disappoitment

Days 16 to 18 are in my Slovenian blog

Throughout my life I have been doing different things. Every time I discovered something new, I became very excited and wanted to share my findings with others. I explained to others the magnificent details of the things that I found amazing. However in a while I went to the next step by discovering something that was even more exciting than the previous thing. It was like climbing the top of the mountains. Every time I would reach a peak, I would with enthusiasm share the magnificent view from the top, however in time I would discover that there is an ever higher mountain nearby.

In time I learned that I can not possible know how many mountains are still out there in the existence and what mountain is the ultimate in height. Thus I started to share my discoveries with others with less excitement, like I would talk about any other thing. I found out also that even if I would explained my finding to others with biggest enthusiasm, some would not be able to understand the point fully and would not be able to get excited as much as I did. Some would even start to pull me down and claim that I am crazy and that what I found out must be a lie and would not believe it. In that cases I would then become very disappointed, sad and angry.

Similar point has showed up in regards to my business and sales. It is common knowledge that if you are a businessman or salesman, the success of the sales depends upon your belief or understanding about the quality of the product. You have to get excited for the product or service that you are selling. You have the understand the value and the quality of the goods and that customers would be very satisfied if they would possess it. So then you start to explain the benefits of the product to the prospects with excitement and passion with hopes that they would take it. Consequently successful presentation brings joy and happiness and if there are no sales, disappointment, anger and depression appears in ones mind.

However successful businessman and salesman have learned not to swap moods regardless of the result of the sales presentation. With practice one develops the ability of staying emotionally stable on every single occasion. This is achieved by understanding the reality of every single business which is that regardless of how valuable product you have, never will everybody want or be able to buy the product when introduced with the benefits of the product. So every time you try to sell something, there would be some that will buy it and some that would not buy it even if you present with all the glamour in the world. Always there will be acceptance and rejection.

This is so because firstly the purchase power and peoples's interest change during time. For example you might in one occasion present the product to someone and the person would absolutely like and want the product but at that time it would be broke, it would not have enough money to buy it and it would thus decline the purchase. Then in some other occasion, the person that you present the product would have more than enough money to buy your product but would not like it or need it at that time due to different desires or priorities. However the person's interest or priorities or wants and the person's purchase power or the amount of money they currently poses constantly changes.

So the main point in every sales is to be always aware that NO does not mean, NO NEVER, but just NO AT THIS TIME. The same person that currently declined the purchase due to lack of money could soon get enough money and buy the product later. Or some person who has currently no interest in the product could soon become very interested in it due to change in it's life circumstances. Thus it is important to always accept this reality and never get to excited in someone buys the product and especially never get angry and create resentment towards the person who currently does not buy the product. It is best to every single time allow the prospect to say NO without any bad feelings.

Based on this realization it is suggested to at the beginning of presentation to clearly express to the prospect that it is OK to say NO, that you really do not care if they say YES or NO and that you will be just fine and in total acceptance with any decision about the purchase that they made at the end. And this is not best only in sales but in any single situation in life. Even in personal relationships with others you experience acceptances and rejections. So it is generally in all times suggested to always be aware of the fact that sometimes the answer is YES and sometimes is NO. And in each case you are to fully accept the reality, understand that there are substantial reasons for that decision and that by not accepting the reality you just harm yourself by creating the energy of the good or bad feelings in you mind.