2011 - How to give an effective support

Within my Deseni process of self-realization, I have been given different kind of support by different people. As part of Desteni I Process life coaching program, one is firstly introduced with basic principles of self-realization like Self-Honestly, Self-Directive Principle, What Is Best For All, Common Sense, mathematical equation 1+1=2, and basic tools like Breathing, Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Application. In next stage of Desteni I Process, one is given more advanced tools, like Mind Constructs and Muscle Communication. And as part of the process, one is requested to have a FaceBook profile, blog and YouTube channel using your real name. The process of blogging and vlogging is a very effective self-supportive tool in order to be able to slow down your thoughts, see your mind-patterns, and remove all your accepted and allowed believes, blames, justifications, projections, manipulations and judgements. These are all the information that, when becoming allowed and accepted into you, prevent you from being able to be here and to accept this reality in every moment of your breath, without triggering any subconscious emotions or feelings.

Within the process, we are supporting each other by following each other's blogs, vlogs, social profiles, forum posts and chats. The ones, who are involved in Desteni I Process, we have our buddies, who are responsible for directing us in order to effectively correct ourselves. When necessary, one is also given a specific support in terms of private videos and direct chats from Bernard, and if one comes to visit Desteni farm in South Africa, one is given even stronger and direct support in order to break as many damaging subconscious patterns as possible. But above all, one is expected to as soon as possible to fully become self-directive in terms what is best for all and to become a constant self-support, since eventually one needs to release dependancy on support from others and unconditionally stand as one and equal to all life.

When receiving support in form of others commenting my blogs posts and blogs, I have appreciated some support as valid and very supportive, and I have experienced some support as not valid an not useful at all. Some have started to comment as soon as they started the process and were not familiar with terminology and had not yet reached sufficient level of self-realisation on order to become a valid supporter, and have just tried to fit into Desteni and become accepted. I was one of them, so I then slowed down with commenting and started to focus more on my own process. Then I have also received a support from Destonians who were in process for many years, and perceived themselves as the ones who walk the talk and are unchallenged authority. They have expressed their perspective about how they perceive me and tried to expose me as someone with agendas of self-interest and not valid to be a member of Desteni group.

I have followed the process of those people throughout past year period and have noticed, that they follow their established patterns of communication and that they do not change. These are Destonians who want to be perfect, just, valid, and protectors of Desteni and all what Desteni stands for. They are producing large quantity of blogs and blogs and are active on formus and do extensive commenting. However in spite of what they are writing and saying, with extensive integration of Desteni vocabulary, I have perceived their support as not valid or effective. I see them as extensively integrating Desteni knowledge and information in their minds, but not actually realised it and integrated it into the physical. I see those people as ones who allow themselves to follow someone's process, and then emotionally react on specific words and information that they stumble upon.

These reactions are very subtle, and are related to unconscious mind patterns of wanting to be perfect, self-judgement and wanting to be a part of the group. These people thus make a great effort to present themselves in the group as valid participants by commenting and reporting others to the leaders of the group in order to impress them. They hold onto very highs standards of self-perfection and are thus very judgmental towards others. Their support is thus from an unconscious starting point of blame and criticism, without they realising this fact for themselves. They perceive their support as valid, and became in time very impatient and angry due to perception that one that they have given the support to does not want to change, instead of realising that they themselves are the one who need to change.

One needs to realise, that you are not able to see one who he really is as totality without firstly totally realising yourself. While you are in the process, you can only perceive others from the perspective of your current level of self-realisation. Thus, those that claim themselves to see others as what they really are, while they are still waking the process, is a clear self-deception. You can try to see others, but in the moment when you try to judge others and claim righteousness, you have in fact fallen. From the perspective of totality of existence, the truth is that no one is completely realised until every single being in existence has become self-realised, and this is what in fact means that we are all equal end one.

So if you want to give the support to others in order to speed-up their process of self-realisation, you have to firstly become one and equal with that person and give support as you would like to receive it if you were in that person's shoes. That means that you have to grasp this person as totality of what he has accepted and became and give the support in a way that he will be capable of accepting and integrating it and to functionally increase his level of self-realisation. So understand that if you give support to someone and this person did not change, this is in fact the indicator that you support was not valid, that you have not became one and equal with this person before giving him the support, that you have supported him from starting point of being someone more, using only knowledge and information, thus you need to take you responsibility, forgive and correct yourself.

This goes for all that have been in the Desteni process for many years, including the ones who have established themselves as leaders. So it is a great art to support others effectively and not allowing yourself and kind of subtle projected impatience, blame or judgement. So let the level of change at people who you have supported to be the indicator of the effectiveness of your support. Do not try to project your failure onto others, but correct your approach and walk the process with others as one and equal.
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2011 - Walking process alone vs. walking in the group

There are many ways of self-realization in this world. We all experience many things in daily life which assist us at realization how we function and how this world functions. We act and we see the results of our action. The speed of self-realization process depends of how one is dedicated to research the depths of self and world system. Throughout history there have been some people that reached very high level of self-realization and there are also some in the current time period. Each one had different background, unique experiences and environment that enabled him high speed of understanding which action leads to which consequence. But why were there only so little self-realized people, and why were they not able to influence the world in the way to stop the violence and destruction of fellow beings and this planet?

We all know the story of some guy by name Jesus Christ, who brought the suggestion of doing onto other what you would like others to do onto you, of loving your neighbor as thyself, but why is this message still not lived practically in this world? He was not aware of complete design of human mind and what is need to fee yourself from influence of unconscious thoughts, and his message has been used and abused in order for some individuals to gain great wealth and high social position, while totally ignoring the practical living of what Jesus has taught. The whole religious system, with new age spirituality has become nothing but a bunch of beautiful words, nice emotional feelings, expectations of some magical savior and beliefs about perfect life after death. It is basically not supporting the individual to gain self-realization, but offers only promises of enlightenment and ascension, while in facts contributes for individual to become more and more trapped in the mind.

After 10 years of research and experience of world religions and other paths of self-realization, I have not been able to find any group or source of information that would honestly and in detail provide information about why is the world the way it is, how have I become the way I am, and what is the solution for all to live in harmony on this magnificent planet, until one and half year ago, when I met Desteni. It is the collection of information and tools where I have experience the absolute level of honesty and functionality to remove everything that has been eating me from within, and is also contains the solution to fix the world economic system that is driving us towards destruction of living beings and resources. The tools of Desteni have helped me to become more emotional stable and aware of what is really here in every moment of my breath. It also supported me to realize the big picture and how I am equally responsible for everything that is going on in this world. Desteni learned on mistakes of self-realized beings in the past and is making sure to improve the approach in order to guarantee the success.

Ok so you might now say: “Cool, I am happy for you, but I decided to walk my process on my own. The path of self-realization is not important, since eventually we will all get to the finish.” Well, really? All you have is this life, this physical body that will be no more when you die. How do you know with certainty what will happen to you at the time of death? Will you be able to reincarnate and continue with you process of self-realization in your next life? Will you not forget the same way as you did when you were born in this body? So better than guessing is to walk this life with the maximum effect and use the most effective tools. Thus I suggest you to research Desteni and experience the effectiveness of its tools that you will receive throughout the Desteni I Process life-coaching program. And even if you walk your own path and become self-realized, enlightened, what then?

Understand that we are all one and that no one can become self-realized until we are all self-realized. Each of us is a part of existence, and each of us is co-creating this existence. So you will not be able to live here and enjoy yourself until beings will exist that will want to harm you or exploit you. Heaven on earth can be practically manifested only if we support and respect each other equally. So when you become self-realized, you will not be able to bear the view on fellow being who suffer. You will try to help them in order for them also to become self-realized. And this is exactly the reason why Desteni was established. You as individual do not have any significant power to change this world. Only if you connect with people who have the same goal and all walk as one, then there is a chance of success. So of you are serious at changing the world, the best way to do that is to join the group of Destonians, who are people from all over the world who walk as based on the principle of what is best for all, common sense and mathematical equation 1+1=2. Support you self-realization by walking the Desteni I Process and support the peaceful political democratic introduction of Equal Money System that represents the first step of providing dignified life for all living beings on this planet. Join us. Together we can do it!
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2011 - Group of Slovenian people with a kid who can see aura

Yesterday was extremely fascinating day with two very interesting meetings. I departure from my home at 7:30 and at 7:50 picked up a new female friend at Kranj city. We then continued highway to the second largest Slovenian city Maribor, where there was suppose to star a meeting of Zeitgeist Slovenia group at 10:00 at Adam & Eve healing tea shop. One day back I also sent the invitation to all active members of Desteni Slovenia, since most of them live in or near Maribor city. I suggested for us to have the meeting at the same place at 12:00, since they wanted to hear my story about holidays at Desteni farm, but Blaž replied that he would also like to come to Zeitgeist meeting. We arrived a bit early, around 9:40, so I called Blaž if he needs any assistance to find the place. He said that there is no need, and that Vitan will pick him up, and that also Barbara and Ajda will come. So the time was 10:00, there was six of us there and one guy, who wanted to meet the Zeitgeist people for the first time, but no one from Zeitgeist leader came, thus we decided to start a chat.

At about 10:30 three guys from Zeitgeist arrived, and I already knew one of them. His name was Andrej, he is also from Kranj, the student of medicine, and his whole family is also involved in medicine. I introduced him with Desteni one year ago, he also writes a blog, but did not want to align his process with Desteni terminology. Since he was familiar with Desteni approach, he suggested a discussion where we would share our realization to contribute towards some solution for this world. Since there was also some girl in the tea shop, who prepared the presentation of the Landmark Forum education, he explained that he also greatly benefited from this education and that it assisted him to completely free himself from the mind. We discussed his perception, trying to establish if that was the fact, but due different terminology, that was not very easy. So we rather focused of developing the Zeitgeist project and how to include Desteni solutions. One of Zeitgeist members suggested the screening of Zeitgeist movie in the schools as the powerful presentation of world problems, and in the second part, Desteni I Process and Equal Money System would be presented as practical solution to fix those problems.

I had a next meeting at capital city Ljubljana at 16:00, and also Blaž and Barbara wanted to join, so we departure from Maribor at 14:00. In Ljubljana we met a group of new people and they invited us to have a peaceful chat in small gym of local elementary school, since they are having occasional recreation there. They were about 30 to 40 years old, one girl and three guys. I befriended girl Urša on the FaceBook a week ago, based on suggestion from Sunette. I noticed that she had a lot of Destonian friends already, and I became very excited about new Destonian from Slovenia. But when I send her a welcome message, she told me that she is part of the group who follow the Desteni Slovenia group from beginning, but they are walking the process on their own. She told me, that they are having a boy who is able to see aura, and that this is a reference point for them to get a feedback if they are successful in their process.

The oldest guy among them is also a leader and is supporting them occasionally with deliberate anger to shake them, similar to Bernard. The child that can se aura is in fact his son, that is now about 14 years old. He was a gym coach, and after he divorced, the aura of his son cracked and disappeared due to immense shock and thus he became able to see the aura of living beings and also objects. He then started to report his father that we are all robots, so basically he was able to see all the systems. Together they started to research and test what is the meaning of colors in the aura and what aura is. The son did not agree with the new age picture presentation and explanations of the meaning of chakras, positioned vertically and colored from red, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple and white as the path to ascension. Thus they developed a symbolic horizontal chart of characters of people, each one equal, but with different characteristics or nature, based on the color of their aura.

For example he explained that black aura is typical for the people who suck energy from others like vampires, and that a lot of those are among school teachers, so they come to school basically to drain children from their life energy. The orange color is typical for the women, who want to attract males with their physical appearance, so basically the whores. The green aura is typical for the people who doe not have a clue, what is going on, like a grown up version of children. Blue aura is typical for politicians and company leaders, who exploit others for their own benefit. The red aura is indication of awareness, where you become angry about the corrupt system. The white aura is typical for the ones who meditate and gurus, but this stage is very delicate, since you can get trapped in the mind. The final step is transparent aura or no aura.

They have checked thousands of people in this world, from politicians, gurus, and discovered that many are fakers and that most of religions and groups exist not for benefit of all, but only for personal and financial benefit of the leaders. Few years ago someone forwarded them a YouTube video with Sunette. When the son saw the video, he freaked out and screamed that this girl is dead! When father asked him, he explained that her aura is transparent, the same as the ghosts of dead people who visit him at night. But after his father explained that this girl is still alive, the son said that she is speaking pure truth on the videos. So this made them become interested in Desteni as the only point discovered, worth of trust in this world. And the other guy who does not have any aura is Michael Tsarion and they gave me the DVD of his movie titled The Architects Of Control that reveals the secret mass manipulation of the human mind.

But this meeting was also to give me the feedback. They showed me the printed photos from my FaceBook profile from different time periods. On the videos that I made one year ago, my aura was blue, this means that I was not living the words that I was talking. At the time before my visit to farm Desteni, my aura has been the color of red, and after I returned from the farm, already the half of my aura was missing. This is how they proved themselves that the Desteni tools of self-realization actually have effect, and that visit to the farm was also very beneficial for me. So the tools of self-forgiveness and self-corrective application are the main difference that will able to bring a great change to the masses.

The father however does not use the tool of self-forgiveness, since he is able to correct himself in a breath. This is due his extensive training in sports, where he used the tool of breathing to decrease his pulse. After he watched the Desteni video Self-Forgiveness as life, he immediately start to apply it. So when a point comes up, he skips the self-forgiveness and immediately utilizes self-corrective application. And he does that without the need of writing.

But what shocked the father later was discovering of fact, that his son is lying to him. Currently his son is in puberty and he became interested in girls. Father heard from someone that his son was in certain company in the city, but when the son returned home, and father asked him if he was with specific person, he denied. Since father knew that his son with transparent aura is lying to him, he went ballistic, and his son ran away and changed aura to red, as it should be. The son knew somehow how to remove all the colors of his aura in a kind of mechanic way, so it was not really valid. The son thus now decided to walk the process the way it should be, from the point of his true current realization.

What is interesting is the fact that loosing aura in not in fact the ultimate enlightenment. Aura represents only the conscious level of the mind. Father noticed that even after loosing the aura, he still emotionally reacted in some occasions, thus no aura is not the final thing. After loosing aura, there is the process of removing also the subconscious and unconscious level of the mind. This is why the process takes about 7 to 20 years, as predicted by Desteni. And then we also need to change the world economic system, with the introduction of Equal Money System. A long way is ahead of us, so let as many people as possible join Desteni and benefit from Desteni I Process which is definitely the most effective program for self-realization currently in the whole planet, now cross referenced also with help of boy from Slovenia who can really see the true auras of being and objects.
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2011 - Dream about innocence, unconscious mind and self-responsibility

I had a dream tonight, about 5am, a night mare I can say, where I have been fighting the concept of innocence, conscious and unconscious mind and self-responsibility. I remember Sunette to be in the dream, and also Bernard. While I was lying on my bad and having this dream, I noticed how a vertigo started to emerge in my head and then I experienced a great urge to go to toilet. Despite my head spinning a bit, I managed to reach the toilet where I took a shit and piss. I did not experience any urge to vomit as usual when I experience vertigo. When I returned to my room, I drank some water. Then I went to bed and the temperature of my body increased and I started to sweat heavily. Again I experienced a great urge to take a shit, even greater than before, so I ran to toilet and a lot of shit came out of me and I was surprised that I still had so much shit in me. While taking a shit, this time a strong nausea also appeared, and I experienced immediate strong urge to vomit. So I immediately turned over, without having time to wipe my shitty ass, and emptied my stomach. It was mostly water that I drank before, but anyway. After that I felt pretty relieved and I went back to bed while still experiencing vertigo. Slowly the temperature of my body dropped and my head stabilized. Then I had a dream with some girl on the farm. We were in the mountains, where there were some caves with crystal clear water and very small, but deep lakes, and we were jumping in the water with a small dog and were diving naked and I observed the water surface from deep below the water. I slept till about 8am and then took a shower, since my head became stable enough to walk. While returning to my room I met Bernard and then I explained him the concept of my dream in the kitchen. He and Sunette commented on my experience and Bernard suggested me to write the dream and correct it in terms of taking self-responsibility, as he has done the same many times in regards to his dreams. Now to details of first and main dream.

Within dream I faced the memories where Bernard spoke with me, a few times with very strong energy, and introduced me to the perspective of myself that was mind-blowing. The first thing was that I was not allowed to us the lack of memory as excuse for what I have done in the past. And that included my past lives also on other planets. Then there were memories of points where Bernard, Sunette and other handled the physical pain and interpretations of the system that cause that pain. Observing these events made me think that there are dimensions of reality that I am unable to see, however they are suppose to be the manifestations of my subconscious and unconscious creation. So in the dream, I fought with these objectives where I was to take responsibility for something that I can not understand and see consciously. My justification was that I may be held responsible only for actions that are manifestations of my conscious mind, and not subconscious and unconscious. I tried to project blame towards Bernard ad Sunette, since I was not able to comprehend and have the same experience and understanding as they have. I was to be left alone and not charged with the crimes that I did not commit consciously.

But the fact is, that I was explained how mind works and that I am in every moment directed by thoughts that are automatically produced by my mind, which is my own creation due to long-lasting allowed and accepted accumulation of information and definitions. In time I have created this energetic entity of personality that has started to suppress me to the level where I almost completely diminished. Even though mind-consciousness system has been constructed in very subtle and deceptive way, it is still my responsibility for every moment when I participated in it. It was me who allowed to follow the thoughts and thus making them alive with my energy of attention. And since I was explained how I am in fact responsible for creating my ego personality, I can no longer be innocent. Thus I am no longer allowed to have the backchat without consequences. I need to stop any movement of the mind, breathe effectively and be here in the physical. Any projections of the past memories or thinking about the future without me actually directing the thoughts is not acceptable. However this is hard to be done due to my ego personality becoming so strong and infused with my physical, that I experience great unconscious physical fear that manifests as vertigo, heat, nausea and vomiting. However there is no other way to survive but to push myself through all of this, breathe through all uncomfortable physical experiences until I eventually birth myself as life as one and equal with all from the physical. I can not exist in this reality without becoming one with it and direct myself towards what is best for all living beings that are part of this reality. I can no longer exist as separate entity, only as observer, protecting only my self-interest and not giving a damn for others. The illusion of my individual mind-reality has to burst and be destroyed once and for all. It was the concept that could not stand the test of time in the first place. Existence can only be if all parts are aware of the full consequence of their actions, and direct themselves towards full support of all other parts of existence. Thus I as one part of existence need to take full responsibility of every single thought, feeling, emotion, voice or physical action, and support every single being as myself or I must no longer exist. No one that has any kind of intention to harm others will not be allowed to exist. So, this life is everyone's last opportunity to correct itself or to end its existence at physical death.

Self-forgiveness statements:

1. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself the feeling of envy towards Bernard, Sunette and other for possessing ability to experience, see and understand the systems and dimensions, instead of realizing that these abilities come with great responsibility that I can not even imagine, and that possessing certain abilities has nothing to do with self-realization, and is not the requirement or indicator of self-realization, since it is about all living being in this existence to self-realize together, as equal and one.
   
   
2. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel pity for myself due to experiencing vertigo, instead of realizing that this is the consequence of my past participation in the mind and that I need to handle it as release of all energy that I have compounded through the time.
   
   
3. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel uncomfortable when someone would ignore me due to expectation of everyone on the farm to treat me as one and equal, instead of stopping my desire to be noticed, understanding that how others react has nothing to do with me, and that it is my responsibility to be stable within, regardless where I am and who is in my presence.
   
   
4. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel ashamed for other to see me how I vomit, have vertigo and similar conditions due to my desire of being perfect and wanting to present myself to others as perfect, instead of realizing that I am far from perfection, that I am separated from all life extensively, and that I will need to walk a long path and experience all sort of accumulated consequence in order to actually become self-realized.
   
   
5. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge others for not being perfect, constantly observing everyone and noticing any mistake, instead of realizing that judging others is in fact self-judgement, and that I need to accept others as one and understand that we are all in the same process, and that it will take a lot of time for everyone to gain perfection in terms of self-expression as one and equal with every living being.
   
   
6. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to comprehend the thinking in term of voices in my head to be equally valid as speaking, instead of realizing that allowing and accepting any undirected voice in my head is the result of separation and will result only in abuse, thus it must be stopped immediately.
   
   
7. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for wanting to be special, caring only about my own self-realization and ignoring others, instead of realizing that self-realization is in fact the realization that we are all one and equal, all interconnected and interdependent and that self-realization can only be achieved if we all support each other in realizing this fact.
   
   
8. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel good if someone else gets hurt and experiences pain and interpreting this as their deserved punishment, instead of realizing that many of pain that other experience is the result of my creation and thus I am responsible for it, so I need to help others equally as myself in order to sort out this shit that I have allowed and accepted, otherwise it will turn back to me sooner or later.
   
   
9. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear others, instead of realizing the fear of others is actually fear of myself due to accepted and allowed abuse in this world and not taking self-responsibility for doing anything practical to assist in solving the problems that all living being experience in this moment.
   
   
10. I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to speak out loud and expressing myself vocally due to lack of my self-esteem, instead of realizing that communicating vocally as physical is necessary and only valid way of communication in order to fully express my every single perspective and not using secret mind, as the mind is the place of deception and abuse, thus every single thought has to be spoken out loud for everyone to hear and not be afraid of any more abuse from my side.
    
    
11. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that I am pretty much enlightened, instead of realizing that I am full of fear of others, constantly fearing to be hurt or to loose my money and property, thus in my secret mind I attack, abuse and destroy others as first in order not to give them any chance to harm me in any way.
    
    
12. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that I am totally cool and ok, intend of realizing that I am a very nasty and deceptive fucker, who use intelligence and knowledge to protect self-interest and leave others in deep shit.
    
    
13. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself the feeling of hate towards myself for being the nastiest fucker, intend of realizing that I have to accept myself firstly the way I am, and then immediately utilize the tools of self-forgiveness and self-corrective application to remove all the bullshit that I have accepted and allowed in my life.
    
    
14. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that everyone is self-responsible for current life experience, and taking care only for my satisfaction, instead of realizing that this perception is a White Light deception that creates illusion of everyone being separated and without any influence and need for responsibility towards others, but in fact we are all interconnected and we all influence each other thus we all are equal responsible for current situation in the word.
    
    
15. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to seek approval of others and fearing judgement of others due to lack of uncertainty, instead of realizing that I others can not baby-sit me for ever, and that I need to stand up and take self-responsibility by utilizing common sense, basic equality equation and principle that is "1+1=2" and "What is best for all".
    
    
16. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wait for others to tell me what to do, instead of realizing that there is enough shit in the world that need to be cleared, thus I need to stand up for all life and direct myself in every moment towards making this world a better place.
    
    
17. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be lazy and the feeling of tiredness, since tiredness comes from participation in the mind and perception of separation, instead of realizing that by breathing effectively and being aware of all fuckness that currently exists in the world, I am able to motivate myself towards actively participating in co-creating heaven on earth.
    
    
18. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself that I do not do enough to bring a change in this word, instead of realizing that the process will need a lot of time and that firstly I need to take care of myself and become a stable point, and then only will I be able to move faster and more effectively.

Self-corrective application:

1. When I notice that someone has some abilities, different from mine, I do not allow myself to compare myself with others, I breathe and remain here, since we have all different appearances and expressions, but are all the same as life.
   
   
2. When I experience any physical reaction, I understand that in that moment I can do nothing but to remain calm and breathe through, since it is all just a matter of time until it will go away.
   
   
3. When I meet other people, I do not expect from them to react in any particular way. I accept any reaction as their own creation and responsibility. I breathe and remain calm and do not allow for any emotion, word or act of others to influence me in any way whatsoever.
   
   
4. When I see people in trouble and distress, I consider them as one and equal and assist and help them to overcome their problems, without allowing any energetic movements before, during and after assistance.
   
   
5. When I notice my mind move, I immediately stop my participation in my mind. I breathe and focus on what is physically here, since the physical is the only valid reality. If the voices in my head are persistent, I assist myself with writhing, do mind construct, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application.
   
   
6. When I communicate with other people, I make sure that my mind does not move, and then I push myself to speak directly and clearly as me as the physical.
   
   
7. When I feel tired I consider other people in the world who live in scarcity, hunger and war and push myself to be active in birthing myself as the physical and supporting equality system that will enable dignified life for all living beings in this world.
   
   
8. When I don't know what to do, I apply mathematical equation 1+1=2, common sense, principle of what is best for all, and ask the members of equality group to establish which way to move myself.
   
   
9. When I want to hurry and become impatient, I slow myself down, breathe, remain here and support myself to firstly be a stable point, and then only act towards making this world a better place.

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2011 - Support for Relationship Demon possessed females

This is support for all women, who long for some specific person, who are in deep love into someone, but this someone is out of their reach or does not want to be in relationship with you.

Understand, that when you grow up, you are being imprinted with billions of information, mostly from your parents, and also from other people an media within your world. Some of those information are regarding relationships between man and a woman. You are fed with definitions of what is your role in this world as a female, how you should act and perform, and part of this female role is also to establish a relationship with some man, create family, have children and thus become a acceptable part of the society.

The parents are the first role model and then you observe also other relationships and copy the information into your subconscious mind. You start imagine your own ideal future relationship or family and thus produce desire for someone that would be able to fulfill this fantasy. Based on your past experience and programming from your parents, your fantasy is very specific of what the ideal partner should look like, how it should act and what shall provide for you in order for you to feel safe and loved.

Then within occasions where you are surrounded with other people, including men, you unconsciously start to observe and compare males with the ideal partner personality in your mind. When some gesture, word, or the looks of someone fits your inner picture of desired figure, then you start to project this ideal characteristics onto the selected male. You create the perception of this male as being something more, someone special, that is indispensable in your life in order to become completely fulfilled.

By this definition and labeling someone as more valuable as everything else, you create the point of inequality. You bring certain part of this creation above the other parts of existence and thus contribute to bringing the whole existence out of balance. Within the context of value, you separate something from everything else and give it much higher value, which result in creating two polarity points, one representing the desired female, and other representing the rest of existence. You stop paying your attention to everything around your equally and start focusing all your attention only on certain being.

Since you focus all your attention only onto someone, the friction within your mind-consciousness system occurs, and from this friction the energy is produced. This energy starts to flow and move within your psychical body and compound around your chest and belly region. The sensation of this energy you then call the feeling of love, and based on your accepted programming, you define this feeling as something normal, as part of the process of creating perfect, long lasting loving relationship. However you are not aware of the fact that it is your participation in your own mind who created this feeling, but project this manifestation out there, onto the person who you have started to define yourself, as being in love with.

However in reality, any being out there has nothing to do with how you feel. No one but yourself is responsible for you falling in love and experiencing the feeling of love. This is completely created by yourself within the mind-consciousness system by creating and holding onto point of inequality. If you continue to hold this point and time-loop in focusing all your mind attention onto someone, more and more energy is created. Within time, this anergy starts to become its own entity and thus the Relationship Demon is manifested.

This energetic demonic entity starts to posses you and slowly take control over you and your actions. You start to loose your mind and do not react in common sense anymore. You stop to treat everyone equally, you ignore their requests, wants and needs, and you start to move only in direction of fulfilling the desires of your Relationship Demon. You become obsessed with stalking selected male, writing him messages, expressing your love and dedication, describing how he is the only one that you are living for, and that he should give you a chance to live together, since you will do anything necessary to make him happy. Within your mind you enjoy the fantasy and pictures of the scenes where he and you will finally be together and live happily ever after.

If the male does not respond to your affectionate actions, then you start to become more and more desperate. Since you have defined the selected male as the source of your happiness and life fulfillment, by him not returning the attention, you define this state as the end of yourself, the road to life of misery and inner suffering. The consequences of feeding this energetic demon is manifested as pain in your body, you cry and desperately suffer. And once again, you are not aware that it is actually you who is inflicting the pain to yourself, but project the cause of the pain outside, onto the male who you desire.

By allowing yourself to go on with participating in this mind pattern, you feed the Relationship Demon to the extent that it totally possesses and consumes your. You end to exist as life and become nothing but energy that wants only more energy from other living beings. You do not take others into consideration, but only want to posses the targeted male, regardless of consequences. You try to get close to him, want to surprise him, perhaps even trap and rape him. If he would fight back, you would become violent and maybe even kill him. You actually do not care about him as a living being, you just want his energy of attention. So if he does not want to give you any attention, you allow yourself the emotion of envy and rather have him dead than allow him to give attention to any other being.

Thus, to prevent psychical or physical violence and murder, I suggest for every female, who experience the progression of described events, to stop immediately. Understand that energy is the trap and that results only in destruction. Life is not energy, the energy destroys life. Energy is produced by participating in mind-consciousness system that produces thoughts and fantasies. Whatever there is in your mind is all illusion. The reality is what is here as the physical in every moment of every breath. The mind allows you to create the bubble of separate individual reality that is different from the universal reality. When you try to impose your mind reality onto physical reality, the friction, energy, violence, pain and destruction is manifested. Thus I suggest not to participate in your mind at any time whatsoever and focus only on what is here in the physical.

The first support tool that helps you to ground yourself in the physical is breathing. If you are constantly aware of your breath, if every in-breath and out-breath is executed by your own will, than you effectively stop the thoughts to bother you and steal you attention from what is here. Thus make sure that you are aware of your breath constantly, in every single moment, without stopping. If you at any time notice, that you are in you mind, than you simply return your attention onto your breath. The other supportive tool is writing yourself to freedom, create mind constructs, indicate the accepted and allowed definitions that prevent you from considering all existence as one and equal, and then self-forgive those definitions. I recommend to research the Desteni I Process that will educate you effectively in tools to free yourself from influences of all energies and support your process of birthing yourself as life from the physical.

I am concluding this support with writing some self-forgiveness as one and equal with the female who has allowed and accepted to become possessed by self-created Relationship Demon. If you experience any level of possession, it is recommended that you read and speak this words out loud, since it will support you in shattering and defusing the mind patterns that in time crystalize and become one with the physical:

1. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fall in love with someone, instead of standing up as life as one end equal to everyone else.
   
   
2. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that falling in love is something normal and desirable, instead of realizing that this is just the information that I have accepted from my environment.
   
   
3. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fall with the excuse of love, instead of realizing that the world "fall" indicates that I am not "standing" anymore, and that I need to remove all things that make me "fall", regardless of their nature.
   
   
4. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define love only as the feeling, instead of realizing that every feeling is the friction-produced energy, and that real love is the practical living as one and equal to every single living being and doing what is best for all.
   
   
5. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that experiencing the feeling of love is the necessary experience that I need to get in order to complete my life, instead of realizing that in the moment that I desire something different from what is here in this moment, I actually stop myself as life and become energy that destroys all life.
   
   
6. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to seek for specific partner, based on my subconsciously created pictures and personality definitions of ideal male, instead of realizing that I can be in successful partnership with anyone who is willing to enter the agreement with me, where each one of us will support other equally.
   
   
7. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as female and allow myself to create female personality and act according to what others have told me that I have to act like just because of my sex, instead of realizing that who I am is life and that any definition that defines me as something less that life is just going to limit my self-expression.
   
   
8. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire the energetic experience of feelings and emotions, believing that to be able to feel is what makes me human and warm and pleasant person, instead of realizing that the nature of energy is to distract me from what is here and that allowing the energy will consequently bring me pain and death.
   
   
9. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think, believing that thinking is the part of who I am, instead of realizing that thoughts are produced by the mind-consciousness system that is enslaving us in time-loops where we repeat mistakes over and over, until we realize that mind is illusion and that what is real is only physical creation in this moment.
   
   
10. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define someone as something more, and then project my definitions out there, instead of realizing that all definitions are my own creation and that no one but me is responsible for how I perceive everything that exists.
    
    
11. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to uplift or degrade any part of reality and thus create the point of separation and polarity, instead of realizing that we are all one and equal and that any part of creation can not exist as more and less valuable than others.
    
    
12. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I can not live and be satisfied without some partner, instead of realizing that I am individual living being that does not need anyone to exist, live end express itself fully in every single moment.
    
    
13. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to forget to breathe and be here, instead of realizing that whenever I forget to breathe and start participating in my mind, I stop being aware of what I am actually doing and thus inflicting paint to myself and others.

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2011 - How physical supports me with itching and vertigo in detail

I have been raised up to become a good brave boy that my parents could be proud of. My mother worked as a midwife and my father was firstly a chimney sweeper, than a head of a air cleaning unit in the steel factory and then he finally started his own business. In the beginning we produced innovative products for steel industry and when recession started, we transformed into visual communications family business. With my younger brother I was helping to produce stuff and services since elementary school and we were not allowed to go out since we could end in the bad company.

During the years of working, I had to obey my father and do what he wanted me to, so I learned to suppress my emotions. This suppression started to manifest on my physical body as the itching region of the skin around my genitals. Firstly I did not know what the reason was, so I went to a doctor who prescribed the treatment with some ointment. This did not help, so I researched alternative medicine and visited several different Chinese and Ayurvedic specialist, but nothing helped. Then after years of the research and experiences, I recognized that there is nothing out there that can help me, since the cause of the problem is within me. I noticed that the pinching itching sensations manifested every time when I had certain kind of thoughts and emotional reactions. When I met Desteni in october 2009, I became familiar with the tools of self-forgiveness and advanced tools of mind constructs that supported me in defusing this emotional reactions. I have noticed, that within last year, I have gradually became more and more stable, the itching diminished extensively, and also the general skin condition improved significantly.

A few years ago I also started to experience vertigos. Several times a year I got so sudden strong vertigo with nausea that I vomited, but this lasted just one day. But a few months ago, I got I massive vertigo that diminished slowly only after one week. This happened after spending a weekend with some girl and then she returned home monday morning. I started to research what could be the cause of the vertigos. Some small vertigos also started to manifest suddenly during the day and I noticed that it appeared after certain form of thinking or mind patterns. I became very attentive about what I was thinking the moment before the vertigo appeared. Most of this small ones went away after I lied down on the sofa and took a short nap for half an hour or so. But I am noticing that I have become more and more sensitive to certain mind patterns and that I had to become more careful about what I am thinking. I could say that the physical has starting to become more and more demanding and that the tolerance level of my unequal thinking has reduced.

Now I have been researching what kind of mind patterns result in what kind of physical support and I came to the following conclusion. The support of itching is related to the mind patterns of anger, intolerance and rushing, thus also the skin developed a rash. It can also be described as the the production of hot energy that burns and disintegrates my skin. Thus I need to cool down my emotions, forgive myself and breathe effectively. And the support of vertigo is related to different kind of mind patterns, like over achiever, superiority and is linked also to emotions like envy and arrogance, wanting to become something more, higher, reaching the sky, thus my head stopped me with the vertigo in order to lower myself down to the equal level with others. The sensation when thinking this kind of mind patterns is like some kind of heavy fog or pickling and tingling feeling that compounds and expands and occupies my whole head. And when I start breathing effectively, my head becomes clear and table again.

So I need constantly to pay attention to my mind patterns and not allowing any anger or envy in order to avoid sensation of itching or vertigo and constantly breathe effectively. I am very thankful to physical for this support, since it mirrors my actions very clearly and supports me on the path to self-realization.
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2010 - Feeling better, processing posts, feedbacks, choosing celibacy

Today is the third day of suffering vertigo and the condition has improved significantly. Yesterday I spent most of the day lying on the sofa, resting and watching vlogs, blogs and one interesting, almost 2 hours long video lecture Capitalism Hits the Fan from professor of economics Richard D. Wolff, who shared his perspective about true reason behind current economic collapse in the USA. Then at about 5pm my some close relative asked me if I could do some designs for his clients at his place. He lives just 5 minutes walk away, but since my vertigo was too strong, he then picked me up with his car. I worked there until 9pm and then he drove me back. After that I spent reading blogs, forums, watching vlogs and chatting until 3am. By yesterday evening my vertigo diminished for about 40% and I got stable enough not to get nausea anymore. Today the vertigo has gone for about 80%, but I feel still too dizzy to go out and visit potential clients for my design services. So I decided to stay home, write this blog, watch some others blogs and vlogs and in the afternoon, when some close relative returns home, I got again some design work to do at his place.

Now about my previous two blogs, wherein I described my second experience with the new girl, I got two feedbacks. The first one was the SMS from the girl itself, who asked me if I got any better and she expressed her hope that I would be able to find some girlfriend that would suit my needs. Her message indicated that she read my blog, so this came quite as surprise, since I did not expect her to follow my posts. I was considering to send her the link to my blog, but since her level of understanding english is suppose to be poor, I estimated that she would not to be able to understand it that she would even get offended by sharing my experience with her publcly. But as I see, she did not only read it, but also understood and accepted it very well. We exchanged some more SMS messages afterwards and she expressed her remorse since her language skills and current life situation do not enable her to be kind of agreement like I would want to. However we spent great time together, and that is what counts the most.

The second feedback came from some Desteni Slovenia member, who experienced my writing as praising myself and trying others to feel envy. She instructed me to immediately do self-forgiveness on these points. We had online chat, and I explained her, that if she experienced any emotional reactions while reading my post, it is up to her to self-forgive any thoughts, feelings and emotions. From my point of view, she is still reacting very much from the point of preaching, criticizing, blaming and projecting her own energetic movements on to others. I noticed many of her FaceBook comments, when she would argue with others about Desteni message, and she would very soon loose her temper and use the expression like: "Face this or die!". While most of Desteni members know what this expression is about, I do not recommend to use it in the first chat with others, since they would understand it simply as life threat, and this is not the way the chat should be experienced, if you want to stand as one end equal with the person who you chat with.

I have been involved in lots of online chats lately and I realized that I have to be very patient and become one with the person in order to explain what process I am currently in and to invite one to join standing up as life. It takes a lot of time, and whenever I was in a hurry, I would just start criticizing and driving the person away. And this is certainly not the effect that I wanted to achieve. Desteni is not about mind knowledge, one needs to get true realization and properly defuse pretty much every emotional reaction first in order to be proper support for others. This is why I also hold myself back and try not to comment much at this time, since I see, that I have quite some issues to deal with myself. So I am currently focusing on watching blogs and vlogs of others and writing myself to freedom in order to become able leading constructive conversation.

So far I have dedicated myself to watch all the Desteni and Subscription Forum new videos, I am up to date with all Subscription Forum topics and with Equal Money Forum Introduce Yourself section topics. I have subscribed to all most active Desteni members blogs on Blogger, have read and commented all recent posts, and I am reading and commenting all new ones. Yesterday I have found a way to also add blogs of Desteni members form WordPress and Multiply platforms to my Google Reader application, so now there is already another 117 blog posts for me to read, which I will focus on slowly in the following days. Then I have a plan to read all the post on the Equal Money Forum, and then also to be more active in the Desteni Open Forum, at least in the Introduce Yourself section. And of course, I have started to blog more often, and I will also continue with vlogging.

Regarding my recent dating activities, I experienced it as something very time and also quite money consuming, and this is not really what I want. While holding hands, kissing, hugging and having sex is very nice, I consider all this just I waste of time, since everything in the world is falling apart, and if I do not focus now on contributing to solutions, I am allowing this agony to continue, until it would eventually also hit me very hard. So no time for distraction with relationships, and I have decided not only to continue with stopping masturbation, but even to have a celibacy, so no sex at all until this mess in the whole world is sorted out properly.

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2010 - My first blog post

Hi everyone and welcome to my new blog!

This blog is intended for my Desteni process support of self-realization. I will be sharing my 'Writing yourself to freedom' posts here that include thoughts, feelings and emotions descriptions, and self-forgiveness on the points where I deceive myself with accepted and allowed believes, ideas, definitions and expectations that distract my awareness from what is in this moment actually here. If you want to know more about Desteni and the process, please visit following links:

http://www.desteni.co.za
http://www.youtube.com/DesteniProductions
http://www.equalmoney.org
http://www.youtube.com/EqualMoney101
http://www.bernardpoolman.org/SRA
http://www.desteni.si
http://www.valentinrozman.si

Thanks and enjoy! Valentin
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