2011 - Valentin's impressions after returning from Desteni farm

I have 10 hour flight from Johannesburg airport in South Africa behind me, just finished passenger control procedures, it is 8:00 hours, I am at gate B13 of Frankfurt airport in Germany, expecting my last connecting flight to Ljubljana airport in my home Slovenia country at 10:30. I have decided to use this time to write about my experiences at Desteni farm from 11. February to 13. March 2011.

After meeting Desteni through YouTube vides in October 2009 and starting Structural Resonance Alignment Training with intent to become a facilitator, it was just a matter of time until I come to Desteni farm, since one month of accreditation procedure was firstly necessary to finish the SRAT and receive license to train others after finishing four years of SRA training. Meanwhile many things change, SRAT became part of newly structured Desteni I Process, and from January 2011 there is no longer mandatory visit to the farm.

Since starting the SRAT, I didn't know exactly when my visit to Desteni farm will take place. I decided to change my professional services from graphic design and photography to counseling and therapeutic services in January 2010 and the income started decreasing in June 2010 due to start of  economic crisis in our country. In order to cover my debts, I decided to sell my apartment and move to Ljubljana capital city, where I expect to earn more money, start study in psychology and support development of equality system more effectively. So after I sold my apartment in January 2011, I had enough of money to afford flight to South Africa.

Economy class airplane ticket from Slovenia costs 1.100,00 € in both sides and you have three connecting flights. Firstly from Ljubljana to Frankfurt that takes about 1 hour, then from Frankfurt to Johannesburg that takes 10 hours and finally the last flight from Johannesburg to Pietermaritzburg that takes 1 hour. On every airport you usually wait for about 4-5 hours to the next flight. In the price of airline ticket there are two peaces of luggage included. The big suitcase that is transported separately must not exceed weight of 20 kilograms, and the hand luggage that you may take on the airplane must not exceed 8 kilos. Theres are also security limitation that do not allow more than 100 ml of fluid in the hand baggage, any sharp and explosive objects, drugs and similar stuff.

When I had to decide what to pack for the travel, I took all my photography equipment that included SRL camera body, two lenses, one tripod and one monopod, notebook computer and additional accessories, together with clothes for hot and cold weather. So I packed only the most necessary stuff and hoped that the weight would not exceed the limitations. However when I came to Ljubljana airport, they discovered that my big suitcase weighted 30 kilos, that's 10 kilos overweight. So I had to pay 20,00 € for every excessive kilogram that summed 200,00 €. At return I tried to fill hand bag with maximum weight, so I had only 7 kilos of excessive weight. At Pietermaritzburg airport they charged me 20,00 € to Johannesburg and at Lufthansa in Johannesburg they said that standard price for extra weight is actually 40,00 € per kilo and that in Ljubljana they undercharged me. So for return, I had to pay all together 300,00 € for excessive weight. Total cost for air travel has thus summed to 1.600,00 €.

The price of Desteni holidays includes all the food on the farm. And if you go out of the farm, you have to pay for all the food and other stuff by yourself. So you require also some pocket money in South African Rands for your holidays on Desteni farm. I did not expect any travels outside Desteni farm, so I was nicely surprised when I had an opportunity to go with Bernard and other people at farm to several excursions to the sea beach, mountains and the river. Bernard covered all the cost of those excursions, but not every visitor to the farm should expect this, since Bernard decides how to treat each visitor, depending on how the visitor behaves.

One should understand, that Desteni farm is not a common holiday resort, and you are allowed to be there only if you are capable and willing of changing yourself. People there, especially Bernard and Sunette give each one powerful support in order to speed up the process of self-realization. For many years people at Desteni farm were giving free support to others. That means that they have actually payed for all the costs of support. It was expected that this support would be appreciated and that in terms of 'you receive what you give', others will start to donate and finically support efforts of Desteni to practically manifest heaven on earth. But since that did not happen due to extensive pre-programming of humans and fear of survival, Desteni had to pick other, commercial way of supporting itself. So it was not hard for me to pay for Desteni holidays due my deep appreciation of everything they had done so far and are still doing with immense dedication.

My largest discomfort when planning visit to Desteni farm were the dogs. I have had a dog when I was young, but for the last 10 years, I have been living in a very nice and teddy apartment, without any pets. I did not like dogs since they droll, roll in dust and everywhere, so I disliked the smell of their fur and hair falling out everywhere. They also like to jump on you and make you clothes dirty or even bite and tear it apart. I like the cats much more than dogs since they are much more clean. So my big concern was how to handle all the dogs in the farm, since they are big and many. There are 17 dogs and 15 cats on the farm. When I arrived there, I was introduced with every dog one after another. Soon I became used to their behavior and I stopped to bother about my clothes being dirty due to them jumping on me occasionally. They quickly became your friends if you throw them some ball. Fetching tennis balls and jumping into the pool is their main entertainment. You just need to be careful that you do not swim under the water, since they jump onto you since they think that you are drowning and they want to rescue you.

There are also 10 horses on the farm. Animals are on the farm as the point of stability, they support you at grounding and change the focus from working on computers. Almost each one on the farm takes after one of horses. There are two main events that take place every day in regards to horses. The first one is at 5:00 where horse stables ares cleaned from horse shit and piss, dirty hay transported to compost pile, water bucket emptied, fly masks put on horses head, and horses escorted to the pasture. The other event takes place at about 17:00, where horse stables are prepared, filled with fresh hay, buckets filled with fresh water, horses escorted from the pasture into stables, fly masks removed, horses checked for flees and bugs, temperature measured, and legs cleaned. During the day and night, horses are additionally checked if everything is ok. I also assisted at cleaning the stables for several times, but then I focused more on receiving enough sleep, as also Bernard suggested, since I started to experience reactions, related to my process and given support.

During my stay on the farm, I experienced how people here need to work with very limited options of communication, since there is only GPRS internet speed, and you have to use USB modem stick that connect you via mobile phone signal. So it takes several seconds or even minutes to open single web page. There is also satellite connection, but it is used only at urgent occasions due to very expensive online time. So in order for all Desteni videos to be uploaded, almost every day, two or three people go with the car about half un hour away to the flat in the Pietermaritzburg city, where there is faster internet connection. Joining the visits to the flat and experiencing the use of USB internet stick made me appreciate the immense effort that people on the farm contribute each day to bring the change in this world.

From all living beings on the farm, the one that impressed me the most is one cat, white and black color, quite slim, that is unbelievably expressive. Some cats have certain personality that I could describe with words like 'scared', 'greedy', 'lazy', 'exhibitionistic', 'defensive', but for this one I could easily use words like 'self-directive', 'unpredictable', 'live' or even 'enlightened'. It came also to my room through the windows and spent several nights with me. It is the only cat on the farm who allows to be held in the arms, when stroked, it does not becomes possessed with the nice feeling of touch and wanting more, like other cats, but accepts the touch, and remains itself. It constantly researches everything and everyone, does not posses any anger, spitefulness, does not harm anyone. It jumps and climbs the roofs, lyes in the gutter, is not afraid of dust or spider nets, even the movement of his tail is so unique, that I have never seen anything like that. Bottom line, it lives here, is full present, never scared, and takes everyone into consideration, has no desires and addictions and thus the perfect example of full expression of life as one and equal.

The most influential human living beings on the farm were of course Bernard and Sunette, especially Bernard, since I hardy spoken to Sunette. Bernard has pushed me extensively in realizing what I have accepted, allowed and became and that this is not acceptable. Naturally, I perceive myself as quite nice and cool guy, but from the perspective of equality of all living beings in existence, I am very far from being perfect. On subconscious and unconscious level I know that, and I have been for the last 10 years extensively seeking the ways how to break the self-illusion and clear all the bullshit. The way how Bernard supported me was not pleasant at all but it was just what I needed and I am thankful for that. It was a powerful shock that challenged my ego and released the suppressed accumulated energy of fear. This is also why I experienced vertigo and nausea. And all living being will need to face themselves in the similar way. The process is compounding, the accumulated consequences of past actions will take their toll, people will experience sudden energy release, some maybe even physical damage or death. The tolerance for abuse in this world is slowly decreasing down to zero. Every thought, feeling and action will result in immediate consequence. And this is the only way to solve this mess in our existence. The heaven or earth is being born. And nothing will be ever be the same. Gladly.
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