11 September 2011

2011 - Improving my interaction with others for better success

I have been observing my behavior patterns when I interact with other people. My observation intensity increased lately due to listening of some audio material that explain how successful people take full responsibility for their lives and how they let themselves to be taught by other successful people in order to change their behavior and make better use of their available time. One of the most prominent characteristics of successful people is to have genuine love or interest for other people, to care for them, and thus build yourself a very attractive charisma. Consequently your open and sincere attitude is accumulated also in many business opportunities that bring a lot of money.

Listening to these material challenges my believe that you can earn a lot of money only if you abuse other people and deliberately manipulate with them to buy what you are selling. I see that I inherited those believes from my parents, especially from my father, who was very critical and cynical towards politicians and rich people, defining them as those who exploit others and steal in very deceptive ways. My father holds a believe that you can earn decent money only if you work hard. He in very innovative in ways how to make money to support himself, but he is not successful in building a team of people that would make even more money. He is full of anger and blame and envy and very short tempered.

In the audio material that I listen, I learn that difference between very successful and less successful people is in taking full responsibility for your life. Successful people never blame others for anything that happens in their lives. They never define anything as bad, but see everything as challenge and opportunity to learn and to make themselves a better person. You always get money from other people, so in order for others to give you money, you need to provide them with something that they want, with something that will improve their lives. Others can sense if you are sincere or if you are just trying to take advantage of them. So being totally honest and truly caring is the key to lasting and increasing success.

When I observe myself and my interaction with other people, I see that I am very uncomfortable with making connections and starting conversations. I need some event to happen in order to break the ice. I need to see some common point of interest before I start sharing myself with others. I need to firstly see the potential of engaging in conversation so that I will get something in return or so that people that I speak with will appreciate what I have to say. Thus I firstly observe others and estimate their level of understanding and compatibility with me, before I consider them worth of contacting.

This point became even more prominent since I started to live with my girlfriend who has much more easy going character and is able to connect with anyone anytime without any judgement or fear. When she finds something or something attractive, she becomes like a child, approaches the subject with funny innocent gestures and voice, extends her arms and touches the subject sweet and gently. One advantage of hers is that she is a woman and they are already by nature more opened and easy to connect between each other, but even among females she is much more childish than others. However she lacks ability of sharing useful supportive content and mostly engages only in small talk.

The harders part of conversation with someone you don't know is starting conversation. One way of how to connect with others is to observe them and pick something that you really like about them. When you approach them you can say: "I really like your tie!" or something. This is cool ice-breaker and it opens subject for discussion. Everyone needs to be accepted and recognized and feel welcome. There is so much criticism in this world, and it is very easy to point fingers, blame, judge and be picky, and it is hard to say something nice about others. It is even harder to give a sincere compliment, without being dishonest and manipulative.

For me it is hard to open myself due to self-judgement, of being dependent on other people's opinion, so I am careful not to make myself a fool or communicate with those who I perceive that will be not interested in what I want to share. I act from a kind of self-protective position where I am more like observer than active participant. I have not yet become person who direct himself towards what is best for all and thus feels no shame or regret. Thus I am continuing with realizing that self-honesty is the key element for permanent succes in life. And it is also about standing for what is best for all no matter what. They say: "The higher the level, the higher the devil", so the one who stands up for life also need to be prepared to face great challenges that come along with this state of the mind.

Many, including me, do not want to disturb others, thus I hold myself back and live rather more quiet and isolated life than put myself in center of attention. I fear that if I would become more opened, others would want my attention, they would want to socialize with me as much as possible and that would drain my energy. I learned that some want to listen and follow others due to not wanting to take self-responsibility for their lives. So they follow easy going people just for entertainment, to distract their attention from the problems in their lives. And this is not what I want to do. I want everybody to take self-responsibility and face everything that they created in their lives. From my point of view, there is enough wisdom in this world that one can easily change their behavior patterns only if decides to stop.

Especially now, where there is awesome Desteni I Process self-development and leadership course available online to everybody, one is able to improve their life significantly. All can find out how mind works for real and get a fast realisation of how we create this world due to acceptance and allowance of repeating thinking and emotional patterns. If one takes full self-responsibility it is possible with use of self-forgiveness and self-corrective application to stop living in the mind and birth yourself as life from the physical. This way you stop being irresponsible observer of what is going on, and start being responsible and active participant that creates world that is best for all. With help of peaceful political agenda of an Equal Money System we have the power to effectively and practically remove also all current legal obstacles that prevent us to live here as in heaven on earth. We are the creator. Let's stop all the inherited evil that we project from past to present and create the world that support all living beings equally.

  1. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself the believe that rich people are all abusers instead of realizing that one can become rich by not caring about others, but there are also a lot of millionaires that care for others very much, and use honesty and integrity as the directive principle of their business.

  2. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself that one can earn decent money only by hard work with own bare hands, instead of realizing that in this way you can earn only limited amount of money, thus you can earn much more if you sell products that are required by a large amount of people, or create a business that provide services for many people.

  3. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself the fear of what will others think of me, instead of realizing that this fear is based in self-judgement and what others think about me is their own creation and projection, thus it is best for me to direct myself in every breath in total self-honesty and self-trust towards what is best for all.

  4. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to be afraid that I will run out of energy if I engage in long conversation with many people, instead of realizing that feeling of being drained always originates from the mind if someone communicates based on knowledge and information and not using common sense, and directive principle of oneness and equality and what is best for all.

  5. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself the believe that it is best for not to disturb anybody an live peaceful life, instead of realizing that I am responsible for everything that exists in this world, thus by not acting and directing others to become self-honest and live here as responsible participants, I allow evil to continue in this world.

  6. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to communicate from the point of hurry, blame, anger and resentment when I see some situation that needs to be aligned with the principle of what is best for all, instead of becoming one and equal with all participants, slow down, be here, and take all the necessary time to give proper information and direct event in order for sufficient realisation is established for the transformation of behavior patterns.

  7. When I meet other people, I become and and equal with them, immediately connect and start conversation with ease and then support others from starting point of self-honesty, equality and what is best for all.

  8. When I speak, I am breathe effectively, stay here, slow myself down, and speak from common sense, from my own personal realisation and thus stay stable and clear all the time, regardless of how long I speak.


06 September 2011

2011 - Perfectionism as the most prominent evil in my life

The most prominent point that I am currently facing with in my process of self-realisation is the subconscious or unconscious pattern of expecting things to be in certain way, as I imagine them in my mind, as ideals of perfections of how I want reality to be. When these ideals are then not fulfilled, I react with subconscious anger that manifest as skin irritation in my genital region. Let me give you some example:

Within development of the back-end distribution center for my Equality Store that will sell licensed promotional merchandising for Desteni world-wide, I decided to implement the 'Web Postal Window' which is the fresh new logistic solution of our national postal company. Usually if you need to send some package, you have to bring it to the nearest postal office and wait in the line. When it is your turn, the postal worker accepts your package, weights it and sticks the stamp in value, according to the weight and country where the package is to be delivered to. You then pay for the stamps, receive an invoice and you are done.

Well, the WPW is the solution where you do not need to go to the postal office to ship the packages, but you do it all at your own business office. However you need to invest in one of the prescribed compatible model of electronic scale which cost around 2000 € and in a termal printer that prints labels size around 4 x 7 centimeters and that costs around 400 €. Then you need to have computer with Windows operating system, since the WPW is the web browser application that requires Microsoft Explorer browser, which is the only browser that does not run on Apple computers that I use. So in order to use the application, I had to buy and install Parallels Desktop virtual machine software worth around 60 € and Windows 7 operating system with price tag from 100 to 200 €, depending on the version. So the sum of total investment in the WPW solution was around 2700 €, not counting the computer hardware.

After you buy all the compatible hardware and software, then you order the qualified electronic certificate at the postal company. The username and password for downloding of the certificate comes in two envelopes, delivered separately. When you successfully download and install the certificat, the computer technician comes and checks if all the equipment is compatible and initializes the WPW web application and makes a test weighting of some object on your electronic scale and prints respective postal label on your thermal printer. You are then qualified to sign the contract with the postal company and receive the instructions and training of how to use their web application.

When you then want to ship some package, you do not need to go to the postal office anymore, but weight the package on your own electronic scale which by USB cable automatically transfers the weight information to the WPW software which then prints respective official postal label on the thermal printer. After you have weighted all the packages that need to be shipped in the current day, you print the collective document and call the postal company delivery wan that collects the packages. You receive invoice and pay for all the postal shipping costs within the past month only at the end of each month. So this solution reduces the time and travel needed, which equal money, towards shipping in usual way.

In comparison to telecommunication providers, when you receive all the modems, routers and movie recording hardware for free and you only pay for the monthly subscription, I was here disappointed since I expected for the postal company to also provide all the necessary hardware for free. And I expected for everything to be sorted out not later than in a week or two, but all the procedure from having to purchase the hardware from all the system becoming functional took over 6 weeks. And even when the system was in place, I was disappointed since the WPW system only takes care for creation of official postal label that is equivalent to postal stamps. So you still need to somehow put the name and address of the sender and receiver on the package either by handwriting or printing two additional larger labels and some larger printer, since the termal printer is too small for this.

I have watched some movies of industrial shipping centers where everything was fully automated, so the system took care for one large label to be affixed on the package that included all the information, including sender, receiver and official postal information. So I was mad that in spite of quite large investment in the WPW system, I still needed to do a lot of additional handwriting or retyping of the same information twice. My expectations were too high, so I become disappointed and angry because they were not fulfilled. And this is only one example from my life where I allow myself subconsciously to hold to some ideal and then created friction and emotional energy of anger when the reality cames out different that I want it to be. So I need to take self-responsibility, forgive myself for living in my separate parallel illusional mind reality, start living here in the physical and accept the current situations in my life the way it is:
  1. I forgive myself for allowing myself to live in my separate illusional mind reality and thus creating conflict between the mind and the physical instead of realizing that life of harmony is possible only if we all live here as one and equal in this solid stable universal reality.

  2. I forgive myself for allowing myself to watch and observe situations and conditions and thus create ideal world in my mind and then become mad if the reality is not the way I imagine, instead of realizing that it is ok to have the vision of better world, but it needs to be created in the physical step by step by firstly accepting the reality the way it currently is.

  3. I forgive myself for allowing myself to define myself as innovative visionary personality, constantly criticizing current situation, imagining how it can be improved and feeling good for in this way defining myself as something more, instead of improving this world from point of oneness and equality, as life, without any good or bad feelings and emotions.

  4. I forgive myself for allowing myself to decide for something, hoping and expecting that things will develop in direction that I imagine, want and desire, instead of pushing myself through point of laziness and do necessary research of the facts so that I get the correct picture of the way the things will develop in this reality.

  5. I forgive myself for allowing myself to connect the high price with perfection instead of realizing that price can be set freely by anyone and it is just a result of decision and is not necessary reflecting the level of quality of some goods and services.

  6. I forgive myself for allowing myself to rush and want to things happen fast, instead of realizing that we live here in the physical reality and it takes time and space and a lot of patience before our imagination takes physical form and shape.

  7. I forgive myself for allowing myself to be dependent of other people's opinion and constantly striving for excellence, being afraid that others will not accept me if I do not prove myself, instead of realizing that life is not about competition and winning, but about mutual collaboration and support so that we are finally able to create a world that is best for all.

  8. I forgive myself for allowing myself to do everything myself in order to save time, effort and money when I order others to do something for me, instead of realizing that not trusting others in not trusting myself and by not allowing others to express themselves, I thus suppress and destroy myself within.

  9. I forgive myself for allowing myself to feel good when I observe and use the things that I possess and thus also feel discomfort when I see other people observe my possessions, instead of releasing my attachment to my possessions and realize that we can live here only when we stop all possessions and share all the available resources, products and services equally among all living beings, based on their physical needs.

  10. I forgive myself for allowing myself to forget that we are all part of the same reality, that we all share this world, thus collaboration from point of equality and what is best for all is the best and only solution to end all evil like scarcity, hunger, violence and war once and for all.

  11. When I communicate with other people, I speak from the point of oneness and equality, I put myself in the shoes/skin of being that I am communicating to, I breathe effectively, I am patient, I speak slowly, clearly, and direct myself and others towards what is best for all.

  12. When I plan something, I set the goal, but allow unlimited time and unpredictable sequence of events before the goal is reached, with awareness that there are a lof of beings in this world that also strive for their goals, so mutual respect and understanding is necessary.
If you want to align yourself with what is best for all, I invite you to join 'Desteni I Process' online self-realisation course and support peaceful democratic solution of an 'Equal Money System' that will guarantee dignified life for all living beings in this world.