After I allowed my father to force me in writing my 'public apology' exactly as he dictated, since he imposed his believe that I 'hurt his feelings', I woke with the pain in the center of my back the next day. I went to check and read the Veno's Structural Resonance document on the back points and saw that the center and lower back and the buttock points are about giving your 'power' or 'life energy' away to the 'mind-consciousness system'.
When I wrote the public apology I considered this act as 'becoming one and equal' with the 'mind-consciousness system' of my father and 'avoiding compromising' myself by short-term indulging the inability of my father to act from the common sense. I did not consider that by doing this I would suffer any consequences, since he agreed that my statement would not be in fact the act of self-honesty but lying and that this would be the last lye that he would demand from me.
However I understand the pain in my back as the consequence of in fact giving my power to the mind-consciousness system and allowing myself to have power over me, since I see no other events that would be able to cause my pain. So I am correcting myself in order to take my life energy back from the mind-consciousness system in order to remove the pain:
- I forgive myself for allowing myself to be intimidated by my father, using his anger and threats of suing me with the lawyer and removing me from his will and not paying me the money for the work that I done for his clients for the price that we both agree upon, since by allowing this I am not allowing my father not to take responsibility for his feelings and emotions.
- I forgive myself for allowing myself to be intimidated by anyone that is not willing to take responsibility for the feelings and emotions that they create for themselves, since every energetic movement is the responsibility of the person who is experiencing it and only they have the power to defuse it by applying self-forgiveness.
- I forgive myself for allowing myself to give my life energy away to other people and suffering their emotional projection and abuse in order to get the money.
- I forgive myself for allowing myself to be directed by mind-consciousness system and thus compromising myself as life, fearing of what other people might do to me and thus allowing energy to be more than life, instead of standing up unconditionally as life in total self-honesty and self-expression and for principles of oneness end equality.