For several weeks I have been experiencing chronic pain in my left elbow. The situation stayed the same regardless of what physical activities I did or how many days I rested. The pain is not constant and I do not feel it when my left arm is in certain positions, like if I am standing up, walking and my arm is just naturally hanging down. There is also no pain if I am lying in my bed in almost any position and the arm is not moving. I only feel the pain when I lift the lower part of the arm up or when I rotate it in a specific manner. I have been wondering if there is some nerve that has been pinched that produces such a feeling at certain movements of my left arm. It definitely is not muscle fatigue or the consequence of something hitting my arm or elbow. I tried to remember when the pain started to occur and there is some correlation with an event of me pruning a cherry tree on 10th June 2024. I spent 6 hours on the tree with a height of 6 meters and I used my arms a lot. In the middle of work, I took a break due to a short but heavy rain shower. So after I climbed back on the tree I had to be extremely careful not to slip on a wet bark.
The pain in my left elbow could be related to this pruning event or not. In a way, it does not make much sense since that pruning event was nothing out of the ordinary for me and I have done even more demanding tree care activities before and my elbows were fine. It is also strange that this particular pain did no go away like any other pain that occurred as the consequence of my physical muscle strain or injury due to some object hitting my body. So I have started to wonder if the origin of the pain is something related to what I have been experiencing on a non-physical level. I checked the information in the Desteni Structural Resonance document by Veno and found that the elbow points represent the antennas that control the direction of a move within the White Light gridline structure of the world according to conscious and subconscious mind personalized and individualized development and design during the experience of here on earth, also referred as The Choice System.
I do in fact am becoming more and more aware of how our lives have been preprogrammed and directed/limited by many systems, externally especially by the legal and money system. I am currently at a cross path when I have been deciding when if ever there will be a proper moment for me to transition from formally being unemployed to becoming self-employed again. In the current stage, I have more financial benefits however I am limited with how I can work and am not able to directly participate in larger arboricultural projects of the national budget consumers. I am in the final liquidation stages of my private institution where I have been in a position of a director. I am trying to remove all the tax debts so that I can register as a sole entrepreneur again. However, I am not happy about the fact that when I do register the government could issue any kind of fine due to breaking any of thousands of laws that I have even no capacity to hold in my memory.
Thus I have been looking at solutions related to the Quantum Grammar and Claim of the Life. I have already provided a document for myself that proves I am a fact and no longer a legal fiction in 2019. However, during the COVID-19 plandemic, I had limited success in using it to protect myself from the government. And also when the police came to my apartment on the order of the tax authority they ignored my documents and took me by force. I feel so much at a disadvantage considering law enforcement and how I can work hard to earn money for many years and then someone charges me for breaking some law and takes all my money, possessions, and freedom in an instant. I am thinking why bother doing anything in this world when it can be taken away or destroyed so quickly?
Also, it is hard to comprehend how existence works in totality since new things are being discovered every single moment. I initially learned a lot from the resources on the Eqafe website about the real history of mankind and the universe. After Bernard Poolmand passed I have been listening to United Network News reports of Kimberly Ann Goguen from The Office of the Guardian on how the systems are being removed, changed, and replaced with the goal of providing everything necessary to start the process of restoring our planet. Yet while it is cool to know that initial Alfa and Omega systems no longer exist and that a Golden Age system has been created, it is still not clear when if ever the promised funds from the KIMS - Key Integrated Monetary System will be available for all of us.
Recently I asked for assistance from the quantum change kinesiologist from the Space of Grace in order to gain additional perspective related to the pain in my elbow. The feedback stated that it is a personality activation of how I maneuver myself in my reality based on feelings/emotions of being used to getting what I want. She is seeing my relationship with my mother there as well so that is specific as in something I've copied from her or developed in relation to her for example she used to coddle me in some way, make me feel special in that way that I developed that belief or habitual pattern of just being used to getting what I want. It's a pattern of relating to my reality in a way that's based on a feeling experience of feeling/believing you need to get what you want. It's also testing out as a work-related injury but this point is also coming up as related to it.
If I look at my relationship with my mother who passed away several years ago due to suicide I can see that I was very close to her while my younger brother was very close to my father. My mother used to listen, understand, and protect me, including against the lies and deceptions of my brother and the pressures of my father. I am not able to recall any specifics of how she was able to assist me in getting what I wanted, however, she indeed was a general emotional support for me. It was more the father who projected power, directed our family business, and used the money to provide us with many of the material things that I desired. I am not sure to what level my mother played a role in convincing my father to buy me things that I wanted. When becoming sole entrepreneur for the first time in the year 2000 I was able to earn significant money and live a good life. I do not see the death of my mother as any pivotal point that influenced my ability to get things that I desire.
Currently, I am looking at what role I should play in my life considering my abilities, capacity, and gained perspectives. The profession of an arborist is something that I enjoy for different reasons however it also has downsides. It definitely enables me to exercise my physical body. Thus instead of me going to the gym and paying for lifting weights, other people are paying me for doing physical work of climbing and cutting trees. However, what I do not like is how the pressure of the climbing harness is stressing my physical body and also occasionally causing painful acne on the skin of my butt and hamstrings that heal very slowly. Also after several hours of heavy work, I need at least a day of rest in order to recuperate. My fingers especially need longer periods of healing due to pain in the joints after I do a lot of grabbing and pulling. I wonder how long and how much I will be able to endure due to aging so I am already moving towards diversification of my services and plan to do more counseling work in the future.
