Day 155: Painful manifestation on my butt

I seat a lot since my work is computer related. When I do something creative on my computer or if I watch some movie, I can seat for hours without standing up and I do not feel any physical discomfort. Despite of my bottom pressing again the chair for a long time, there are usually no long-term consequences of that. However occasionally I get some painful manifestations around the rectum that persist for several weeks and during that time it is very uncomfortable for me to seat on the chair and work with computer. Those manifestations are hardly visible to the naked eye, but when touched with the hand they feel like a hardened parts of the skin, usually elongated, like a vain, a few millimetres thick and a few centimetres long. Sometimes they include also a special painful spot, like a pimple however it is more solid and deeper than a common pimple. Such part of hardened skin with a very painful spot also manifested on my butt a week ago and this time I decided to do a deeper research about the cause of it in order to prevent it from reoccurring in the future.

Those of us who are part of Desteni group and walk Desteni I Process course for self-realisation have the privilege of support from experienced New Kinesiology practitioners. So I also scheduled a Skype session with one of them and explained my problem. The first thing that she indicated is that the painful manifestation on my buttocks is related to my mental processes. However she immediately also asked me if I already went to check it with a doctor because even though she tested out that it is a mind point, it may not automatically heal itself if and when I look at the mind point. Then she specified that the cause is a projection, specifically projecting emotions or expressions such as hostility, anger, hatefulness, selfishness, distance and irritation onto a person. In such emotional experience I reacted with sadness, guilt, remorsefulness, depression, tiredness, feeling stupid, inferiority and isolation. And the next related point that she indicated was a backchat of hatefulness, anger, hostility, criticism, selfishness, sarcasm and feeling hurt.

When I checked my memory what sorts of events I experienced around the time when the painful manifestation on my butt occurred I immediately remembered a visit of a policeman at my home. That policeman called me on the phone a day before and explained that he wants to talk to me since he is investigating a probable case of illegal money pyramid. I remember that immediately after the call, I had a massive backchat throughout the rest of the day and I imagined all kind of possible scenarios that might take place when he will arrive the next day. I have been pondering how to answer his questions, starting with introduction of myself. My encounters with police were very rare and I face them only several times in my life during the common traffic checks and when I reported couple of cases to them. However never have I been under investigation for anything illegal. Due to me wanting to be an example of a good person that does not harm anyone I wondered how even came so far that someone reported my activities as having something to do with breaking the law.

My core pattern that I have been transforming for the last several years has been fear about being criticised by others which is connected to my desire of wanting to get attention by impressing others with sharing of advanced knowledge and information. And I am still a bit sensitive about what others think about me especially if they blame me for something that I did not done or they perceive me as the opposite of how I want to be experienced by others. The next point that made me react especially to a person who has been in a role of policeman was information that I got in a study group where we researched the secret history and functioning of global legal and money system. It was explain that contrary to public believe that police is to protect us they are actually protectors of the public legal system that was created for the benefit of the Crown and the Pope who have been controlling and enslaving the humanity through religion and money system. Because as explained, by issuing of the birth certificate, we are turned into a legal fiction called the Person and taken all the human rights in exchange for the benefits of the public social system.

So the first thought that came through my mind after the policeman announced his visit was how shall I answer if he asks me if my name is Valentin Rozman. Because if I give him my full name as it stated on my birth certificate and my national ID card, legally I am confirming to be a legal fiction and will be handled as such. I started to project knowledge and information gained in the research group and created an enemy construct about the policeman. In my mind he was an evil representative of enslavement and abuse system with powers that he can use to arrest me and put me in jail. And because I was not skilled in legal terminology I would not be able to answer him in the way where my natural rights as a living human on land would be effectively protected. So I became quite scared and afraid what will happen when and as I face the policeman, especially because he will come to me in regards to a money related charges. About the operations that I have been involved in I have mede sure that all is legal and have several months ago contacted all the respective government agencies for them to confirm that everything that I have been doing is aligned with Slovenian legislation. Despite of knowing that the policeman will not be able to find any evidence of a criminal activity because all that I do is aligned with the law, I was still very uncomfortable due to possibility that he will be able to find something that I have missed to see.

When the next day the policeman came, I was surprised that he was not in the uniform, he just came in without introducing himself or asking me about my name and only after we sat down behind the table, he showed his badge and asked me about my birth date and place. He actually never asked for my name or any identification document. Then he explained that he came just to checked a few facts and that there is no person who suffered any damage due to my activities. He just needed to do some research on behalf of government financial agency in order to confirm that all is according to the law. We had quite a nice three hour talk where I enlightened him about many things that he was not aware of. Like that the fiat money system is actually the biggest theft in human history despite of being totally legal. All went fine however during the chat I noticed that I was still quite tense and in a slight emotional reaction because I did not consider the policeman as an equal but someone who is superior to me and is also in role of a someone who is violating natural rights despite of him probably thinking that what he does is for the good of the whole society.

After our chat I also sent him the proof of my previous communication with financial government agencies and their answers and I expect that this case will be closed soon. Now it is up to me to write some statements in order to transform my patterns of projecting blame and anger towards policeman and thus taking full self-responsibility for all the related reactions that me and no one else is responsible for:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to label the person who announced his visit only as the policeman and not as an equal human being who is only temporary acting in a role of a policeman. I realise that I was the one who actually violated natural human rights of the human who came to me by not treating him as equal being. I commit myself to when and as a human comes to me and introduces themselves as a representative of certain organisation and my mind produces thoughts like: “Oh wow, this human has special right and powers and I must submit to him!” to stop and breathe. I then communicate with them with awareness that all beings are one and equal as life and that we do only express ourselves though different body interfaces and play certain roles.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that there is no difference between the functioning of police in the United States and here in Slovenia. I realise that despite there are some general legal overlays that consider each country on this world equally, there are considerable differences about the legal system and functioning of the police in Slovenia. I commit myself to when and as I meet the policeman in Slovenia and my mind goes: “Remember the videos about how nasty police in the US treat the people so you have to equally be afraid of the police in Slovenia!” to stop and breathe. I then communicate with the Slovenian police not just with understanding that they are much less aggressive than in US but to also understand that they are humans like me and want to be equally treated with respect and kindness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am a good person that has done nothing wrong and that I must not be approached with any allegations. I realise that despite of someone doing only good to others and treating them as one and equal, they can still be attacked and accused by others due to different fears, misunderstandings, unclarity, caution and projection of past experiences. I commit myself to when and as someone is treating me as a suspect of doing something wrong and my mind is producing thoughts like: “I feel deeply insulted for someone even thinking that I am capable of harming others since I am the guy who does nothing but good to others!” to stop and breathe. I then continue to listen what the accusation are calmly and explain my perspective without taking it personally and understanding that until others will also not take full responsibility for their participation in the mind, I will still have to face the consequences of their points of separation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my responsibility is only to work on transforming my own mind patterns and after that my work is done and I can enjoy life in peace and happiness. I realise that this this is not true because we are all one and in this together and that no one is free unless we all are free. I commit myself to when and as I meet someone where I see that they are struggling with their mind patterns and I get thoughts like: “This is their own problem and I must not assist them but only leave them alone to face themselves!” to stop and breathe. I then support them the same as I have been supported by others in order to give forward what I have received within patience and persistence until all beings will transform their mind patterns to the level where we all will be able to live in harmony and abundance.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to engage in massive thinking about all possible sorts of scenarios of how the meeting with someone could look like immediately after someone announces that they want to meet with me. I realise that it is futile to think about how some event will look like in the future because such thinking is only separating me from what is currently here and is not assisting me in any way possible. I commit myself to when and as someone schedules a meeting with me and my mind starts to create all sort of imaginations about how the meeting might look like and what the results might be to stop and breathe. I then while waiting for the time of the meeting focus on being productive with what is here and prepare practically for that meeting and nothing more. The fact is that many scheduled meetings even do not take place since something can change and any meeting can thus be delayed or canceled even just a few minutes before the scheduled time of the meting.

In relation to this blog post, I invite you to assist also yourself with awesome self-perfecting tools within free online DIP Lite course and to listen to educational audio titled Working Through Your Blame from the Metaphysical Secrets of Imagination series at Eqafe web store with hundreds of extremely supportive educational items that hold answers to any imaginable question about life and this existence.

Day 154: Meeting Jehovah's Witness

Several days ago a man age around 40 dressed in a suit rang our house door bell. He gave me a leaflet and invited me to a meeting to discuss about life. I took a leaflet and just by the illustrations used I recognised that he is a member Jehovah's Witness religion group. At that time I was doing something and I expected the postman to arrive so I was surprised that someone else was at the door. Just that disappointment already created a subtle emotional reaction that then only started to accumulate. Then soon the postman actually came while I was still chatting with Jehovah's Witness at the main door. So I became dissatisfied that he is interfering with my communication with the postman that I expected. After the postman left I continued talking with the Jehovah's Witness and explained him my point of view until he eventually left knowing that he would not be able to convert me to his religion.

During the chat with Jehovah's Witness I remembered how my grandmother in her late years after her husband died and she moved to the retirement home, she also became member of this religion. She started to visit the meetings, read their bible however they did not let her to be baptised because she did not truly understand and accepted their belief. I drove her to their religious facility many times and I also attended a couple of session. In my past 15 years I read all the holy books of world religions that were available in our public library, I listened to many priests and gurus and also become part of several religions for a short period of time. I wanted to experience which religion is the best, which can explain the existence in the most detail and what explanation is actually the truth. 

Jehovah's Witness are definitely one of well organised religious groups that I met. Firstly they usually visit people's homes in couples. So I was a bit surprised that the guy who visited me was alone and I started to ask myself is this because number of their members had decreased and can not afford any longer to visit others in tandem. When in public Jehovah's Witness are also very well dressed, they keep detailed records who they have visited and what the response were and are very consistent. During the religious meetings they give excellent presentations with best sound equipment, dedicated stuff brings microphones to participants who want to say something and they have nice meeting halls. They are also very effective in raising funds and translating their texts to almost all world languages. 

However I learned during my research how religions were specifically created to mentally enslave humans, to control and divide us. I noticed how those who are part of Jehovah's Witness group are not capable of common sense and are equally possessed and blinded by their beliefs like any other religious groups. But the question here is if I have proved to be any better? Have I been teaching by my own example what is the utmost potential of human beings? The answer is no. Because it was not nice from me that I held quite emotional conversation with the poor guy only at the main house door and have not invited him to my living room. I know that he is blinded by religion but I have not become one and equal with him and was not effective in showing what is a better way for humanity to live in peace, abundance and mutual respect.

The point is that I have reacted to the visit of Jehovah's Witness from point of frustration, past experience projection, blame, spite, envy, fear, anger, hopelessness and superiority. And despite of consciously knowing what is the best approach in building a supportive relationships with other, I at that time did not applied those principles practically. Instead of becoming envy about their effectiveness to recruit new believers, it would be best for me to apply the principle of research everything and keep what is good. I could share the Desteni message with greater effect if I would invite the visitor to my living room and ask him about his life experiences and what lead him to becoming a Jehovah's Witness. Instead I emotionally reacted due to my belief that members of his religious group are so well brainwashed that trying to explain him anything that would challenge his beliefs it is a pure waste of time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to react with emotion of disappointment when I opened the front house doors and instead of the postman there was someone else there. I realise that despite of expecting someone to come at certain time there is always a possibility that someone else will come at that time. I commit myself to when and as I notice that someone else has arrived instead of expected individual and my mind is producing thoughts like: “What the fuck is now this person doing here instead of the individual that I am expecting!” to stop and breathe. I then ask the unexpected person what they want and explain that currently I do not have time to talk with theme since I am expecting someone else to come however they can return later or schedule a meeting with me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to react with emotion of superiority when I noticed that a member of religious group has come to visit me. I realise that Desteni message is about equality and oneness and that I am entitled to present myself as Destonian only if I also practically live Desteni principles in my everyday life. I commit myself to when and as I am confronted with people of religious views and my mind is producing thoughts like: “I must now quickly show how they are wrong and how I am right!” to stop and breathe. Then I engage in conversation with them, allowing enough time to create friendship, to research and understand their life story, what benefits they get from their religion and then to explain how humans do actually not need any religion but can live in harmony and mutual respect by simply following certain principles and taking responsibility for participating in our minds.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with emotion of envy when the member of Jehovah's Witness started to present the facts about how many members they have across the world and in how many languages their information has been translated. I realise that it is not productive to be envy about achievements of others. It is much better to learn from others who are successful and to eventually become equally successful in what we want to achieve. I commit myself to when and as I notice the achievements of other and my mind goes like: “What the hell, I hate them so much for their achievements!” to stop and breathe. I then ask what is their secret recipe and pick their brains so that I can get smarter and more effective in making this world the best place for all. 

In relation to this blog post, I invite you to assist also yourself with awesome self-perfecting tools within free online DIP Lite course and to listen to educational audio titled The Dawn of Religion from the Reptilians series at Eqafe web store with hundreds of extremely supportive educational items that hold answers to any imaginable question about life and this existence.