Today I have watched a two hour footage of lecture of Primož Verbič who is the president of SVOOD - Slovenian Society for Freedom of Choice. He had a speech in the Youth Cultural Center in Škofja Loka, where I am also to have a speech about my experiences with Desteni on 9. February 2011. He proved that vaccination is not only ineffective and that can also cause death, thus the doctors who enforce vaccination should be charged of murder.
Then I stumbled upon one video that some of my friend on FaceBook shared a YouTube video with Croatian subtitles on his wall and it held an information about Italian medical doctor Tullio Simoncini, who has been researching cancer for many years. In the footage of his lecture he claimed that cancer is the result of human body defense when Candida fungus starts to spread due to disrupted body acidity. He proved that cancer can be cured effectively simply if it gets in touch with sodium bicarbonate. And the skin cancer can be fully cured just with the iodine solution. All the information in shared in many languages, including Slovenian, on his web site > http://www.curenaturalicancro.com
Since the mother of my friend, who lives in the same building, is working on the Slovenian Oncology Hospital, I called her and shared the interesting information with her. Not long after I started to share her this information, she stopped me and said that she does not believe the information on the internet and that she trusts her colleagues that collect the most advanced knowledge on the many top world medical conferences. She did not bother to check the information for herself, and reacted simply out of ego end self-interest. This response of hers did not come as a great surprise, since I already shared her some useful information once and she proved that she does not give a fuck about patients, as long as she gets her big monthly paycheck. I gave her another try, but she exposed herself again as totally ignorant and irresponsible person.
As the lecture about vaccination and treating cancer exposed, there is a great resistance from the medical corporations, they make a great effort to discredit the free-thinking scientist, send annoying journalist and ridicule the discoveries in the media. Of course, simply because the new methods are not lucrative, but very cheap or free, so corporations and medical industry can not profit from patients anymore. And the doctors who spent a huge amount of money to get their medical diploma are not able to charge for their precious advices anymore. The whole medicine is corrupt, and it is the current money system that is holding everyone in the position of self-interest and greed. Thus this problem can not be fixed with small corrections, it will take a whole new system with the different values in order for all to break free from this slavery of banking terrorism. We need the Equal Money System that will support all life as one and equal and bring heaven on earth in the effective and practical way.
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22 January 2011
2011 - Message to the girl who is madly in love with me and the vertigo
Herewith I am going to expose my thoughts related to the girl who came to visit me all the way from other side of our country and stayed here for period of five days in order to also help me with packing and moving out from my apartment that I sold recently. But before I continue, I will note another vertigo that I experienced this morning.
For the past several days I have been staying up until 2am and then waking up around 8am, so I slept for 6 hours per night. In these days I was also very active with using computer, especially FaceBook, where I very intensively started to befriend all the people who I recognized as ones with potential to stand up for equality. All this actions were very focus intensive and I had to weight up who to ask for friendship and who not. This morning when I was in bed, and the alarm started to ring, I continued with sleeping. I noticed that subconsciously I started to think about something very intensely. I felt how this mind activity started to compound and build pressure in my head and the vertigo emerged. I started to sweat extensively, like getting fever, and I felt that my body is dehydrated and that if I would drink a glass of water, I would get ok. So I stood up and went in the bathroom while still experiencing the vertigo. Firstly I wanted to take a piss and shit, but while I was sitting on the toilet, the vertigo became so strong that I turned around and vomited. Since I had an empty stomach, only a bit of saliva came out of me. Then I took s few sips of water from the tap and returned to bed. After two hours of resting the vertigo went away completely and I was able to stand up and continue with my daily activities.
Now back to the main subject. It has been now around two weeks since the girl who spent five days with me went home. What is strange, is that she also experienced strong vertigo when she came home for a period of few days. And she has been calling me and sending me SMS messages daily, sometimes several time per day. She is telling that she is in love with me and that only once she loved a man so strong like me, that she is missing me and wants to be with me and hug me, and do whatever I would want her to do, and that she would go to the end of the world with me, and that I am so sweet and delicious that she wants to bite me and eat me alive, that I have stolen her hearth and soul, that she is going to love me even if I would be fat, old and ugly, that she is crying all the time and experiences a great pain in the chests since she is missing me so much, that my ears, nose and belly are so adorable, and that she would also shave her hair for me and follow me to Africa or to any place on this world, and that she wants to spend every single moment with me.
While some man would feel flattered by compliments like this, be thankful and accept the woman who is so dedicated, I response very different to this kind of words and actions. I invited this girl to visit me again since I required some help with packing stuff and moving out of my apartment, and since I liked the way how we interacted when she came to visit me for the first time. Now, when she came to visit me for the second time, the first thing what we did was having sex, since we both needed to release the energy that compounded in few weeks after the first visit. Then I planned for us to pack as many stuff as possible, but how the following few days actually resulted, was in having sex twice per day and hanging together without doing anything regarding packing stuff. It was only the fourth day when we finally got fed with each other and started to dismantle some furniture and fill the cardboard boxes with closed and shoes and similar stuff.
I enjoyed this experience, but I also became a bit tired of all this sticking together. I was not able to focus an writing blogs or watching Desteni videos and I was not able to be alone and enjoy the peace and silence. But what bothered me the most was that this girl did not care about my Desteni process, and was only interested in me as my physical body and personality. Although she has been in the process of self-realization by reading many spiritual book, she was not interested in the tools of writing herself to freedom and self-forgiveness. I explained her that her definitions of me and projections of her feelings of love are unacceptable and that I am only willing to be in an agreement with someone as one end equal with me, so we can support each other in the process of removing all the mind bullshit and take full responsibility of every single thought, feeling and emotions. I explain to her this every time when she calls me, but she does not take it seriously, she only smiles and wants to be funny and cute.
Yesterday she said that I may tell her directly if I do not want her to call me again, and I confirmed, since I wanted her to take time to cool down, but after few minutes, she called me again and said that she is unable to do that. So all this is indicating extreme mind possession, but since being in love is in our society so acceptable, she is not aware about the seriousness of her allowed and accepted anergy possession. I still respond to every single phone call of hers, since I do not mind if anyone calls me from time to time. There are some attributes regarding her physical body that I do not find very attractive, like that she is several years order than me, that the skin in her face looks very tired and that she has extensive deep blue circles around her eyes, that indicates some kind of strong inner imbalance. I also do not like long hair, since it is impractical and bothers the intimate physical interaction. I find her slender body quite attractive and her voice is very tender, soft and caring. But even if she would be younger than me, with perfect face skin and short hair, I would still not want to be with someone that is totally possessed with me.
I like to be alone, since I need peace in order to focus on my process of self-realization, support others and contribute to the solutions like Equal Money System that would provide for all living beings on this world equally and restore the balance. So I am only willing to accept someone that is equally inspired by Desteni and will join me as a part of the group who speaks and walks as one in order to impact this world effectively and bring the heaven on earth as soon as possible.
.
For the past several days I have been staying up until 2am and then waking up around 8am, so I slept for 6 hours per night. In these days I was also very active with using computer, especially FaceBook, where I very intensively started to befriend all the people who I recognized as ones with potential to stand up for equality. All this actions were very focus intensive and I had to weight up who to ask for friendship and who not. This morning when I was in bed, and the alarm started to ring, I continued with sleeping. I noticed that subconsciously I started to think about something very intensely. I felt how this mind activity started to compound and build pressure in my head and the vertigo emerged. I started to sweat extensively, like getting fever, and I felt that my body is dehydrated and that if I would drink a glass of water, I would get ok. So I stood up and went in the bathroom while still experiencing the vertigo. Firstly I wanted to take a piss and shit, but while I was sitting on the toilet, the vertigo became so strong that I turned around and vomited. Since I had an empty stomach, only a bit of saliva came out of me. Then I took s few sips of water from the tap and returned to bed. After two hours of resting the vertigo went away completely and I was able to stand up and continue with my daily activities.
Now back to the main subject. It has been now around two weeks since the girl who spent five days with me went home. What is strange, is that she also experienced strong vertigo when she came home for a period of few days. And she has been calling me and sending me SMS messages daily, sometimes several time per day. She is telling that she is in love with me and that only once she loved a man so strong like me, that she is missing me and wants to be with me and hug me, and do whatever I would want her to do, and that she would go to the end of the world with me, and that I am so sweet and delicious that she wants to bite me and eat me alive, that I have stolen her hearth and soul, that she is going to love me even if I would be fat, old and ugly, that she is crying all the time and experiences a great pain in the chests since she is missing me so much, that my ears, nose and belly are so adorable, and that she would also shave her hair for me and follow me to Africa or to any place on this world, and that she wants to spend every single moment with me.
While some man would feel flattered by compliments like this, be thankful and accept the woman who is so dedicated, I response very different to this kind of words and actions. I invited this girl to visit me again since I required some help with packing stuff and moving out of my apartment, and since I liked the way how we interacted when she came to visit me for the first time. Now, when she came to visit me for the second time, the first thing what we did was having sex, since we both needed to release the energy that compounded in few weeks after the first visit. Then I planned for us to pack as many stuff as possible, but how the following few days actually resulted, was in having sex twice per day and hanging together without doing anything regarding packing stuff. It was only the fourth day when we finally got fed with each other and started to dismantle some furniture and fill the cardboard boxes with closed and shoes and similar stuff.
I enjoyed this experience, but I also became a bit tired of all this sticking together. I was not able to focus an writing blogs or watching Desteni videos and I was not able to be alone and enjoy the peace and silence. But what bothered me the most was that this girl did not care about my Desteni process, and was only interested in me as my physical body and personality. Although she has been in the process of self-realization by reading many spiritual book, she was not interested in the tools of writing herself to freedom and self-forgiveness. I explained her that her definitions of me and projections of her feelings of love are unacceptable and that I am only willing to be in an agreement with someone as one end equal with me, so we can support each other in the process of removing all the mind bullshit and take full responsibility of every single thought, feeling and emotions. I explain to her this every time when she calls me, but she does not take it seriously, she only smiles and wants to be funny and cute.
Yesterday she said that I may tell her directly if I do not want her to call me again, and I confirmed, since I wanted her to take time to cool down, but after few minutes, she called me again and said that she is unable to do that. So all this is indicating extreme mind possession, but since being in love is in our society so acceptable, she is not aware about the seriousness of her allowed and accepted anergy possession. I still respond to every single phone call of hers, since I do not mind if anyone calls me from time to time. There are some attributes regarding her physical body that I do not find very attractive, like that she is several years order than me, that the skin in her face looks very tired and that she has extensive deep blue circles around her eyes, that indicates some kind of strong inner imbalance. I also do not like long hair, since it is impractical and bothers the intimate physical interaction. I find her slender body quite attractive and her voice is very tender, soft and caring. But even if she would be younger than me, with perfect face skin and short hair, I would still not want to be with someone that is totally possessed with me.
I like to be alone, since I need peace in order to focus on my process of self-realization, support others and contribute to the solutions like Equal Money System that would provide for all living beings on this world equally and restore the balance. So I am only willing to accept someone that is equally inspired by Desteni and will join me as a part of the group who speaks and walks as one in order to impact this world effectively and bring the heaven on earth as soon as possible.
.
21 January 2011
2011 - How physical supports me with itching and vertigo in detail
I have been raised up to become a good brave boy that my parents could be proud of. My mother worked as a midwife and my father was firstly a chimney sweeper, than a head of a air cleaning unit in the steel factory and then he finally started his own business. In the beginning we produced innovative products for steel industry and when recession started, we transformed into visual communications family business. With my younger brother I was helping to produce stuff and services since elementary school and we were not allowed to go out since we could end in the bad company.
During the years of working, I had to obey my father and do what he wanted me to, so I learned to suppress my emotions. This suppression started to manifest on my physical body as the itching region of the skin around my genitals. Firstly I did not know what the reason was, so I went to a doctor who prescribed the treatment with some ointment. This did not help, so I researched alternative medicine and visited several different Chinese and Ayurvedic specialist, but nothing helped. Then after years of the research and experiences, I recognized that there is nothing out there that can help me, since the cause of the problem is within me. I noticed that the pinching itching sensations manifested every time when I had certain kind of thoughts and emotional reactions. When I met Desteni in october 2009, I became familiar with the tools of self-forgiveness and advanced tools of mind constructs that supported me in defusing this emotional reactions. I have noticed, that within last year, I have gradually became more and more stable, the itching diminished extensively, and also the general skin condition improved significantly.
A few years ago I also started to experience vertigos. Several times a year I got so sudden strong vertigo with nausea that I vomited, but this lasted just one day. But a few months ago, I got I massive vertigo that diminished slowly only after one week. This happened after spending a weekend with some girl and then she returned home monday morning. I started to research what could be the cause of the vertigos. Some small vertigos also started to manifest suddenly during the day and I noticed that it appeared after certain form of thinking or mind patterns. I became very attentive about what I was thinking the moment before the vertigo appeared. Most of this small ones went away after I lied down on the sofa and took a short nap for half an hour or so. But I am noticing that I have become more and more sensitive to certain mind patterns and that I had to become more careful about what I am thinking. I could say that the physical has starting to become more and more demanding and that the tolerance level of my unequal thinking has reduced.
Now I have been researching what kind of mind patterns result in what kind of physical support and I came to the following conclusion. The support of itching is related to the mind patterns of anger, intolerance and rushing, thus also the skin developed a rash. It can also be described as the the production of hot energy that burns and disintegrates my skin. Thus I need to cool down my emotions, forgive myself and breathe effectively. And the support of vertigo is related to different kind of mind patterns, like over achiever, superiority and is linked also to emotions like envy and arrogance, wanting to become something more, higher, reaching the sky, thus my head stopped me with the vertigo in order to lower myself down to the equal level with others. The sensation when thinking this kind of mind patterns is like some kind of heavy fog or pickling and tingling feeling that compounds and expands and occupies my whole head. And when I start breathing effectively, my head becomes clear and table again.
So I need constantly to pay attention to my mind patterns and not allowing any anger or envy in order to avoid sensation of itching or vertigo and constantly breathe effectively. I am very thankful to physical for this support, since it mirrors my actions very clearly and supports me on the path to self-realization.
.
During the years of working, I had to obey my father and do what he wanted me to, so I learned to suppress my emotions. This suppression started to manifest on my physical body as the itching region of the skin around my genitals. Firstly I did not know what the reason was, so I went to a doctor who prescribed the treatment with some ointment. This did not help, so I researched alternative medicine and visited several different Chinese and Ayurvedic specialist, but nothing helped. Then after years of the research and experiences, I recognized that there is nothing out there that can help me, since the cause of the problem is within me. I noticed that the pinching itching sensations manifested every time when I had certain kind of thoughts and emotional reactions. When I met Desteni in october 2009, I became familiar with the tools of self-forgiveness and advanced tools of mind constructs that supported me in defusing this emotional reactions. I have noticed, that within last year, I have gradually became more and more stable, the itching diminished extensively, and also the general skin condition improved significantly.
A few years ago I also started to experience vertigos. Several times a year I got so sudden strong vertigo with nausea that I vomited, but this lasted just one day. But a few months ago, I got I massive vertigo that diminished slowly only after one week. This happened after spending a weekend with some girl and then she returned home monday morning. I started to research what could be the cause of the vertigos. Some small vertigos also started to manifest suddenly during the day and I noticed that it appeared after certain form of thinking or mind patterns. I became very attentive about what I was thinking the moment before the vertigo appeared. Most of this small ones went away after I lied down on the sofa and took a short nap for half an hour or so. But I am noticing that I have become more and more sensitive to certain mind patterns and that I had to become more careful about what I am thinking. I could say that the physical has starting to become more and more demanding and that the tolerance level of my unequal thinking has reduced.
Now I have been researching what kind of mind patterns result in what kind of physical support and I came to the following conclusion. The support of itching is related to the mind patterns of anger, intolerance and rushing, thus also the skin developed a rash. It can also be described as the the production of hot energy that burns and disintegrates my skin. Thus I need to cool down my emotions, forgive myself and breathe effectively. And the support of vertigo is related to different kind of mind patterns, like over achiever, superiority and is linked also to emotions like envy and arrogance, wanting to become something more, higher, reaching the sky, thus my head stopped me with the vertigo in order to lower myself down to the equal level with others. The sensation when thinking this kind of mind patterns is like some kind of heavy fog or pickling and tingling feeling that compounds and expands and occupies my whole head. And when I start breathing effectively, my head becomes clear and table again.
So I need constantly to pay attention to my mind patterns and not allowing any anger or envy in order to avoid sensation of itching or vertigo and constantly breathe effectively. I am very thankful to physical for this support, since it mirrors my actions very clearly and supports me on the path to self-realization.
.
2011 - Got money from selling apartment, bought ticket to Desteni farm
After two days of delay, the buyer of my apartment finally wired me the money, thus my apartment definitely got a new owner. So for the past few day, I have been very busy with paying all the past bills, delayed taxes, closing bank credits, ordering passport, preparing the visa application, making flight reservation and Desteni Farm holiday booking. Today I plan to open the bank account at new bank, since I had bad experiences with my current bank, and I will have to wait only two weeks in order to get credit card, and not two months as my current bank demands. I also have to pay commission to the real estate agency and check if all the taxes are payed in accordance to our laws. By Saturday I plan to move out of apartment completely and temporary settle at my father's upper flat. I then plan to update my computer graphic design software, buy a camera and start to produce vlogs and blogs more regularly.
.
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17 January 2011
2011 - Considering farming in order to relieve my butt
It has been now almost one year since I started Structural Resonance Alignment Training. When it was firstly introduced, there was no detailed description of what it would include and how will the lessons be structured, so I was not able to predict how will it influence my life. I pictured it as being only a deep study and guidance on tools like self-forgiveness and self-corrective application. So I was quite surprised when we started with muscle-communication, which was totally mind-blowing and I still get amazed every time when using it. Then the mind constructs lessons started and I saw how deep and detailed analysis of our mind patterns can be. And filling response sheets with information about what our unconscious mind networks exist as was also quite a challenge. In spite of great resistance that I had with pulling out all of information, I was able to push myself and do all the homework in time, so I am quit satisfied with myself.
However it was not until six months after beginning of my SRAT study when I realized that extensive blogging and vlogging would also have to become major part of my life. It would be far more convenient for me if I could continue with my current style of life, doing my business and enjoying whatever I would like to do throughout the day. I expected that my SRAT tutor would only give me some goal-oriented assignments and when I would finish them, I would have no more obligations in regards to the process. But slowly I started to realize that Desteni process is not about executing specific assignments, but about birthing yourself as life from the physical and living the message of oneness and equality and doing what is best for all in every single breath. This means to become constantly stable inside and to direct yourself not as energy, but as the principle. Just understanding this concept is very challenging and to actually become life that stands the test of time, is an hard-to-imagine achievement.
The way how my parents raised me and influenced me, especially my father, was to obey him and do exactly what he wants and to not what he does not want. So I became used to move myself only if there was some other impulse, meaning, if other people would instruct or order me to do something. I have became obedient worker without self-will, bravely executing orders of others, and when I finished the job, I stopped moving. And I am still looking forward for someone to direct me, to give me some assignment, and if there is no impulse from outside, I became lazy.
If there is nothing specific that someone wants me to do, I go into low-esteem mode, researching, enjoying and resting. In some way, I have abdicated my self-will, so I find hard to direct myself when I am alone. In that occasions I allow my mind to move me. If I do not know what to do, I lye down on the sofa and take a nap. While resting, I start to think and then I come to idea what would be cool to do next. Then I wake up and start moving myself towards execution that idea. Most of ideas that I come up with are oriented towards research, self-realization and making this world a better place, but they do not have significant impact. The thing I enjoy the most is watching and sharing Desteni videos and other information. I like befriending people who want to discover themselves and invite them to research Desteni. But there are also stuff that I do not like as much, since they involve reading texts and removing mind-fucks.
As a DIP recruiter, I am also receiving ITD lessons so I can get acquainted with the process that ITD student are walking in order to be a proper buddy to my recruits in the future. I have noticed that the second lesson includes suggestion to blog every single day. While I have decided to blog more frequent a few months ago, the initial information about the minimum amount of blog posts for the beginners was about one post per month. That seemed to me too infrequent, so I was very surprised when I heard about daily blogging for the ITD students. As a future buddy, I wanted to be equal to the ITD students, so I read all the lessons and re-watched the suggested videos, but now I am also faced with the challenge to blog daily. While I compared myself to other Destonians from Slovenia who blogged just a few times per month, I have been very satisfied with my achievement of blogging several times per week. But now, when ITD students from Slovenia started to blog daily, I have lost my lead. Thus I will have to push myself even more to catch up with the rest of the group.
But no problem, if others can do it, I can do it also. Well it is not so hard for me to write myself out mentally, but it is the physical that is making me problems. I mean the physical pain system and the gravity are making me hard to blog. Since every blog takes from one to two hours to write, I need my body to be still in order to hit the keyboard on the screen accurately and write what I have on my mind. But after some time of not moving my physical body, the force of gravity starts to press on my skin and muscles which results in increasing pain that redirects my attention from writing. Thus I need to stop writing, move my body and then continue. Since I spend a lot of time sitting and using computer already for my business, research and entertainment need, having to blog daily means to increase the amount of time while sitting and using computer even more. So my butt suffers extremely and extensively and the nasty and painfully boils start to appear on the skin of my ass.
I see the computer as a very useful tool to communicate with lots of people regardless of their locations, and it also tool that I use to create graphic design, execute pre-press, and retouch photos as part of my business services. If I add watching videos for education and entertainments, I can conclude that I am using computer for most of my day. I have no problems with my eyes while watching for so long, it is only the buttocks that takes all the stress. So I consider changing my professional services into something that would result in more physical activities and would not include using computer. Thus owning and working on some far is a very attractive Idea. It would bring me the opportunity to ground and earth me much better and to be in touch with other living beings, since now I am mostly separated from natural environment, spending all day in my apartment. So when I return from the holidays on the Desteni farm, I will check the available options of buying a small farm somewhere in our country or joining some group that already owns and lives on the farm.
.
However it was not until six months after beginning of my SRAT study when I realized that extensive blogging and vlogging would also have to become major part of my life. It would be far more convenient for me if I could continue with my current style of life, doing my business and enjoying whatever I would like to do throughout the day. I expected that my SRAT tutor would only give me some goal-oriented assignments and when I would finish them, I would have no more obligations in regards to the process. But slowly I started to realize that Desteni process is not about executing specific assignments, but about birthing yourself as life from the physical and living the message of oneness and equality and doing what is best for all in every single breath. This means to become constantly stable inside and to direct yourself not as energy, but as the principle. Just understanding this concept is very challenging and to actually become life that stands the test of time, is an hard-to-imagine achievement.
The way how my parents raised me and influenced me, especially my father, was to obey him and do exactly what he wants and to not what he does not want. So I became used to move myself only if there was some other impulse, meaning, if other people would instruct or order me to do something. I have became obedient worker without self-will, bravely executing orders of others, and when I finished the job, I stopped moving. And I am still looking forward for someone to direct me, to give me some assignment, and if there is no impulse from outside, I became lazy.
If there is nothing specific that someone wants me to do, I go into low-esteem mode, researching, enjoying and resting. In some way, I have abdicated my self-will, so I find hard to direct myself when I am alone. In that occasions I allow my mind to move me. If I do not know what to do, I lye down on the sofa and take a nap. While resting, I start to think and then I come to idea what would be cool to do next. Then I wake up and start moving myself towards execution that idea. Most of ideas that I come up with are oriented towards research, self-realization and making this world a better place, but they do not have significant impact. The thing I enjoy the most is watching and sharing Desteni videos and other information. I like befriending people who want to discover themselves and invite them to research Desteni. But there are also stuff that I do not like as much, since they involve reading texts and removing mind-fucks.
As a DIP recruiter, I am also receiving ITD lessons so I can get acquainted with the process that ITD student are walking in order to be a proper buddy to my recruits in the future. I have noticed that the second lesson includes suggestion to blog every single day. While I have decided to blog more frequent a few months ago, the initial information about the minimum amount of blog posts for the beginners was about one post per month. That seemed to me too infrequent, so I was very surprised when I heard about daily blogging for the ITD students. As a future buddy, I wanted to be equal to the ITD students, so I read all the lessons and re-watched the suggested videos, but now I am also faced with the challenge to blog daily. While I compared myself to other Destonians from Slovenia who blogged just a few times per month, I have been very satisfied with my achievement of blogging several times per week. But now, when ITD students from Slovenia started to blog daily, I have lost my lead. Thus I will have to push myself even more to catch up with the rest of the group.
But no problem, if others can do it, I can do it also. Well it is not so hard for me to write myself out mentally, but it is the physical that is making me problems. I mean the physical pain system and the gravity are making me hard to blog. Since every blog takes from one to two hours to write, I need my body to be still in order to hit the keyboard on the screen accurately and write what I have on my mind. But after some time of not moving my physical body, the force of gravity starts to press on my skin and muscles which results in increasing pain that redirects my attention from writing. Thus I need to stop writing, move my body and then continue. Since I spend a lot of time sitting and using computer already for my business, research and entertainment need, having to blog daily means to increase the amount of time while sitting and using computer even more. So my butt suffers extremely and extensively and the nasty and painfully boils start to appear on the skin of my ass.
I see the computer as a very useful tool to communicate with lots of people regardless of their locations, and it also tool that I use to create graphic design, execute pre-press, and retouch photos as part of my business services. If I add watching videos for education and entertainments, I can conclude that I am using computer for most of my day. I have no problems with my eyes while watching for so long, it is only the buttocks that takes all the stress. So I consider changing my professional services into something that would result in more physical activities and would not include using computer. Thus owning and working on some far is a very attractive Idea. It would bring me the opportunity to ground and earth me much better and to be in touch with other living beings, since now I am mostly separated from natural environment, spending all day in my apartment. So when I return from the holidays on the Desteni farm, I will check the available options of buying a small farm somewhere in our country or joining some group that already owns and lives on the farm.
.
15 January 2011
2011 - Zeitgeist Moving Forward - Movie review
Today was the world premiere of the third Zeitgeist movie titled "Moving Forward". I reserved the ticket a few weeks ago, since I am in touch and following the activities of the Zeitgeist Movement in Slovenia. The screening took place in several major town in our country, and I went to Kranj, which is closest town to my place. The movie started at 6pm and it was over 2,5 hour long. I went to watch the movie with expectations, like the title suggested, that Zeitgeist had moved forward, made some new steps, so I wanted to see what new solutions would bring the movie in order to manifest the idea of moneyless society and round cities with resource-based economy.
The movie started with some explanation that addictions and violence are not genetically caused, but are the result of social environment. Interviews with several experts were part of the movie in order to underline every conclusion. Then the part of how money is currently created and all the related frauds have been pictured. The atmosphere became more and more intense with the introduction of dramatic music and scenes that predicted mass riots. Then the music changed in touchingly guitar solo and the clips of solution in form of resource based society and sustainable round cities was introduced. This part was so touching that I had to push myself and breathe very deep and fast in order not to cry because of joyful feelings.
There was some part in the movie that pointed equality as the crucial factor in gaining peoples satisfaction and prosperity. Some talk was also in regards to forgiveness and that it should be not used, but I did not understood everything that was said due to very small subtitles. And also feelings and emotions have been mentions, since the lack of money is not the cause of the stress, but the bad feeling because of not having it. However the role of equality point and power of feelings and emotions was not presented as the major factor. And only the physical brain has been presented as origin of human behavior, totally disregarding non-physical dimensions.
The whole planet has been presented purely as the location of human resources, on hand purely for the exploitation of the human kind. There was no mentioning of the rest of the species, like animals and plants, focusing only on the metals and minerals as the building elements for the devices that will bring us pleasure. The robotic automation and computers were praised as the solution to relieve humans from unwanted jobs. The produced goods would be build at highest quality standards to last as long as possible. And the purpose and joy of the humans is suppose to be in creating things.
At the end was the breaking point where pressure compounded and the human crowd and the police force were to face and hit each other. Then some man from the office called the chief of police and then it took of his helmet and dropped it on the floor. And on the side of the civilians, some businessman threw his suitcase full of money in the air so it smashed on the floor, broke open and the money fell on the ground. Then slowly the rest of the crowd followed and they all trashed their bags of money, as they realized that they do not need it anymore, and all became very blissful and joyful.
So this are all the major points of the movie that remained in my memory. I can say that the movie was a great disappointed, since I expected to hear about some new and practical solution about how to fix this world. It was a disgrace that animals and plants have been totally ignored as being, not worth of inclusion in the equality equation. The movie gave the man all the right to exploit the whole planet just for his own pleasure, introducing sustainable economy not from the point of accepting every living being as one and equal, but as the superior and dominant species, worth of ruling this planet. No actions were to be made in order to remove human ego, and the responsibility of individuals for their thought, feelings and emotions was not taken into consideration.
The idea of the introduction of the resource based economy was based on the imagination of human as species coming from outer space to this planet, that was not yet inhabited. We were to look at the whole planet and see the similarity between the ecosystem and the connectedness of the internal organs of human body, thus we were to treat the planet as a whole balanced system. And the idea of ending all problems of this world was based on the spontaneous moment, when we would all collectively miraculously come at the same time to enlightenment and realization that we do not need the money anymore, would get rid of it in a single moment, and then we would live happily ever after.
I saw no actual difference between this movie and the previous ones. The same points were propagated as before, only the script was a bit different, more structured and clear. So Zeitgeist is Moving Forward, by staying on the same spot. No actual practical solutions how to make the transition from current money system to no money system. No deep understanding of how mind-conscious system is enslaving and possessing us by producing thoughts, feelings and emotions, and no realization about how each of us is responsible for everything that we allow and accept and that there is no other solutions but self-forgiveness. Zeitgeist has the vision, but their vision is the continuation of human elitism end technological superiority, without understanding of all the point and dimensions that exist and create this reality.
However I introduced myself to the girl who was a head of the screening and I asked her if there will be any discussion afterward. She told me, that it will take place in two weeks and all the Zeitgeist members from Slovenia that would like to contribute, will be invited. I gave her my contacts and said that I would like to introduce the solutions of Desteni, but I do not know it they will actually want to hear, since I already shared information to some of the members, but they did not express much interest yet. But she told me, that every suggestion is welcome and that she is totally open for anyone who has got some useful idea. So I plan to share Desteni solutions at the group discussion, and maybe I will meet her even before the meeting and explain her my experiences face to face.
The movie started with some explanation that addictions and violence are not genetically caused, but are the result of social environment. Interviews with several experts were part of the movie in order to underline every conclusion. Then the part of how money is currently created and all the related frauds have been pictured. The atmosphere became more and more intense with the introduction of dramatic music and scenes that predicted mass riots. Then the music changed in touchingly guitar solo and the clips of solution in form of resource based society and sustainable round cities was introduced. This part was so touching that I had to push myself and breathe very deep and fast in order not to cry because of joyful feelings.
There was some part in the movie that pointed equality as the crucial factor in gaining peoples satisfaction and prosperity. Some talk was also in regards to forgiveness and that it should be not used, but I did not understood everything that was said due to very small subtitles. And also feelings and emotions have been mentions, since the lack of money is not the cause of the stress, but the bad feeling because of not having it. However the role of equality point and power of feelings and emotions was not presented as the major factor. And only the physical brain has been presented as origin of human behavior, totally disregarding non-physical dimensions.
The whole planet has been presented purely as the location of human resources, on hand purely for the exploitation of the human kind. There was no mentioning of the rest of the species, like animals and plants, focusing only on the metals and minerals as the building elements for the devices that will bring us pleasure. The robotic automation and computers were praised as the solution to relieve humans from unwanted jobs. The produced goods would be build at highest quality standards to last as long as possible. And the purpose and joy of the humans is suppose to be in creating things.
At the end was the breaking point where pressure compounded and the human crowd and the police force were to face and hit each other. Then some man from the office called the chief of police and then it took of his helmet and dropped it on the floor. And on the side of the civilians, some businessman threw his suitcase full of money in the air so it smashed on the floor, broke open and the money fell on the ground. Then slowly the rest of the crowd followed and they all trashed their bags of money, as they realized that they do not need it anymore, and all became very blissful and joyful.
So this are all the major points of the movie that remained in my memory. I can say that the movie was a great disappointed, since I expected to hear about some new and practical solution about how to fix this world. It was a disgrace that animals and plants have been totally ignored as being, not worth of inclusion in the equality equation. The movie gave the man all the right to exploit the whole planet just for his own pleasure, introducing sustainable economy not from the point of accepting every living being as one and equal, but as the superior and dominant species, worth of ruling this planet. No actions were to be made in order to remove human ego, and the responsibility of individuals for their thought, feelings and emotions was not taken into consideration.
The idea of the introduction of the resource based economy was based on the imagination of human as species coming from outer space to this planet, that was not yet inhabited. We were to look at the whole planet and see the similarity between the ecosystem and the connectedness of the internal organs of human body, thus we were to treat the planet as a whole balanced system. And the idea of ending all problems of this world was based on the spontaneous moment, when we would all collectively miraculously come at the same time to enlightenment and realization that we do not need the money anymore, would get rid of it in a single moment, and then we would live happily ever after.
I saw no actual difference between this movie and the previous ones. The same points were propagated as before, only the script was a bit different, more structured and clear. So Zeitgeist is Moving Forward, by staying on the same spot. No actual practical solutions how to make the transition from current money system to no money system. No deep understanding of how mind-conscious system is enslaving and possessing us by producing thoughts, feelings and emotions, and no realization about how each of us is responsible for everything that we allow and accept and that there is no other solutions but self-forgiveness. Zeitgeist has the vision, but their vision is the continuation of human elitism end technological superiority, without understanding of all the point and dimensions that exist and create this reality.
However I introduced myself to the girl who was a head of the screening and I asked her if there will be any discussion afterward. She told me, that it will take place in two weeks and all the Zeitgeist members from Slovenia that would like to contribute, will be invited. I gave her my contacts and said that I would like to introduce the solutions of Desteni, but I do not know it they will actually want to hear, since I already shared information to some of the members, but they did not express much interest yet. But she told me, that every suggestion is welcome and that she is totally open for anyone who has got some useful idea. So I plan to share Desteni solutions at the group discussion, and maybe I will meet her even before the meeting and explain her my experiences face to face.
- I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have a feeling of superiority while introducing Desteni to the girl, chief of screening, instead of realizing that she is equal to me, and that Desteni message needs to be lived by not allowing any energetic possession.
- I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become angry and then suppress this feeling while listening to some illusional claims in the Zeitgeist movie and thus manifesting itching on the skin, instead of realizing that I need to stop all judgements, breathe effectively, listen without any emotional reactions and then communicate the solutions that are best for all with complete inner stability as life.
.
12 January 2011
2011 - Contract closed, climbed the hill, researched sexual intimacy
Today I went to real estate agency and signed a contract with the couple who decided to buy my apartment. All went well and I should receive money to my bank account next Monday. Thus I have pushed the preparations for holidays on the Desteni farm and visited travel agency who also organized travel to South African football world cup a few months ago and got all the information what steps will I need to take.
Firstly I went to photographer that took the pictures for the documents. Then I went to local administrative unit and ordered the making of passport since I do not have one yet and it will take about one week to receive it. Then I wil need to bring the passport to the travel agency and the agency will sent it, together with the written invitation from the farm and my financial information, to the South African Embassy in Vienna. The embassy will check my information, print the visa in the passport and send back the passport in about 10 days period. Meanwhile I need to book the plain tickets since they are cheaper if you book them as soon as possible. If everything will go well, on 10. February 2011 I will be on my plane to the other side of the globe.
While I was busy with the formalities, my girlfriend has been staying alone at my apartment. When I returned back, she has been again all over me and we went all the way. We had a long sex while she was on the top all the time, and I let her do all the moving. I wanted to know how she experiences it, what she is feeling, but she told me not to disturb her, since she wants to focus on the feeling. It is interesting that usually she talks all the time, but now she was not willing to share any information. I enjoyed very much but I also wanted to understand what she feels, since I also explained her yesterday how I experience sex and what kind of touch is for me pleasant and which is unpleasant. So far she only explained that she is usually experiencing several small orgasms and after she gets the big one, she is not in the mood to continue anymore. I found this information interesting, since as I read about woman's orgasm, that they are able to experience it sequential one after another without desire to stop at some point. So this has been something new to me.
Then we got out and climbed the local hill and the girl complained how her legs are all soft and rubber like. But we managed to reach the peak successfully and had a nice cup of tea at the farm of Mrs Milka. It was already pretty dark while we were heading down the hill. Since my father called me to immediately come to his office and do some small project on the computer, we stopped bye at his place and I introduced him with my girlfriend. After I finished the job, we went home, had shower and I had something to eat. Then she went to bed and I finally got some peaceful time in order to watch the new daily Desteni videos and start writing this blog.
In regards to this girl visiting me, I noticed that I had trouble with finding the sufficient time to do all the stuff that I usually do when I am alone. She constantly needs my attention, touches, caresses and kisses me all the time and talks and makes questions non-stop, even if I watch some video. She explained how she desires touching, since she has been divorced for may years, her son has already grown up and does not allow her to hug him anymore, so the way she compensated her feeling of loneliness in recent time was by frequently hugging her teddy-bear. No wonder why she is so lustful, since now I have become her bear and I am much more appropriate to cuttle and beyond. Tomorrow we are going to start packing stuff to move myself out and I am looking forward to the experience of this joined project.
Spending time with this girl has been a opportunity to put myself on the test. While she physically moved and talked, I was careful about any of my emotional reactions. I pushed myself to breathe effectively and remain here, not to have any expectations and tried to communicate with her effectively. I can not say that I had none reactions whatsoever, but still I am satisfied that I have become much stable than like a was few months ago. The Desteni tools of self-forgiveness and Structural Resonance Alignment Training has definitely improved my emotional stability extensively and I expect to go even further by walking my process in the future.
.
Firstly I went to photographer that took the pictures for the documents. Then I went to local administrative unit and ordered the making of passport since I do not have one yet and it will take about one week to receive it. Then I wil need to bring the passport to the travel agency and the agency will sent it, together with the written invitation from the farm and my financial information, to the South African Embassy in Vienna. The embassy will check my information, print the visa in the passport and send back the passport in about 10 days period. Meanwhile I need to book the plain tickets since they are cheaper if you book them as soon as possible. If everything will go well, on 10. February 2011 I will be on my plane to the other side of the globe.
While I was busy with the formalities, my girlfriend has been staying alone at my apartment. When I returned back, she has been again all over me and we went all the way. We had a long sex while she was on the top all the time, and I let her do all the moving. I wanted to know how she experiences it, what she is feeling, but she told me not to disturb her, since she wants to focus on the feeling. It is interesting that usually she talks all the time, but now she was not willing to share any information. I enjoyed very much but I also wanted to understand what she feels, since I also explained her yesterday how I experience sex and what kind of touch is for me pleasant and which is unpleasant. So far she only explained that she is usually experiencing several small orgasms and after she gets the big one, she is not in the mood to continue anymore. I found this information interesting, since as I read about woman's orgasm, that they are able to experience it sequential one after another without desire to stop at some point. So this has been something new to me.
Then we got out and climbed the local hill and the girl complained how her legs are all soft and rubber like. But we managed to reach the peak successfully and had a nice cup of tea at the farm of Mrs Milka. It was already pretty dark while we were heading down the hill. Since my father called me to immediately come to his office and do some small project on the computer, we stopped bye at his place and I introduced him with my girlfriend. After I finished the job, we went home, had shower and I had something to eat. Then she went to bed and I finally got some peaceful time in order to watch the new daily Desteni videos and start writing this blog.
In regards to this girl visiting me, I noticed that I had trouble with finding the sufficient time to do all the stuff that I usually do when I am alone. She constantly needs my attention, touches, caresses and kisses me all the time and talks and makes questions non-stop, even if I watch some video. She explained how she desires touching, since she has been divorced for may years, her son has already grown up and does not allow her to hug him anymore, so the way she compensated her feeling of loneliness in recent time was by frequently hugging her teddy-bear. No wonder why she is so lustful, since now I have become her bear and I am much more appropriate to cuttle and beyond. Tomorrow we are going to start packing stuff to move myself out and I am looking forward to the experience of this joined project.
Spending time with this girl has been a opportunity to put myself on the test. While she physically moved and talked, I was careful about any of my emotional reactions. I pushed myself to breathe effectively and remain here, not to have any expectations and tried to communicate with her effectively. I can not say that I had none reactions whatsoever, but still I am satisfied that I have become much stable than like a was few months ago. The Desteni tools of self-forgiveness and Structural Resonance Alignment Training has definitely improved my emotional stability extensively and I expect to go even further by walking my process in the future.
.
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